ATBWSTBP Chapter 9

Chapter 9: The Source of the Onset

Jin Mo entered Jin Baiyan’s room, turned on the light, closed the door, took off his coat, and collapsed onto the bed.

He curled up, buried his face in Jin Baiyan’s pillow, and remained motionless, like a wax figure.

After a long while, intermittent sobs emanated from the pillow.

He had been suppressing it all day, constantly telling himself that his brother was just hiding, and as long as he searched diligently, he would find him soon!

Just like when they played hide-and-seek as children!

The pillow still held his brother’s unique scent, clear and refreshing like plants, the most captivating scent in the world for him.

But these scents would completely dissipate in a few days!

He had a faint premonition that this time, finding Jin Baiyan would not be so easy!

After feeling sentimental for a while, he suddenly got up.

He went into the bathroom, took a shower, washed away the decadence and sentimentality, and then came out.

He picked up his phone and opened the files Dr. Qin had sent him, which included several videos and some medical reports.

…

“Jin Baiyan!”

“Yes!”

“Can you describe in detail the problems you’re experiencing?”

“I don’t know if it’s because I’ve been under a lot of pressure lately! I always feel like my mind is very muddled!”

In the video, Jin Baiyan’s face was pale, and he kept rubbing his temples, looking like he was in bad shape.

“How muddled?” Dr. Qin stared intently at Jin Baiyan across from him.

“It’s just… two voices appear in my head from time to time, constantly arguing! It hurts my head so much!”

As Jin Baiyan spoke, he slapped his head irritably.

“When did this start happening?”

“For a while now!”

“What are they arguing about?”

“It’s…” Jin Baiyan started to speak, but then stopped, stood up, and walked straight to a corner.

Seeing this, Jin Mo’s heart pounded.

Jin Baiyan in the video was clearly showing signs of an onset.

Dr. Qin also realized this and didn’t say anything more, but quietly got up and followed behind Jin Baiyan.

The video didn’t show Jin Baiyan’s expression, only his voice could be heard.

“Jin Baiyan, are you just going to abandon Little Mo like this?” a gloomy and cold voice came out.

Jin Mo couldn’t help but shiver; he could hardly believe his ears.

That voice just now, as cold as a demon, sent chills down his spine, and it actually came from Jin Baiyan’s mouth!

How was this possible?

He raised his hand and rewound the video a little, staring intently at the screen again.

That’s right, the voice was definitely coming from his brother, although he couldn’t see his expression.

“He’s already a freshman, an adult, not at the age where I can just tell him what to do, and he’ll do it!”

This was a gentle voice, filled with weariness, the familiar voice he had been hearing from Jin Baiyan every time he spoke to him for the past two or three years.

Jin Mo covered his mouth, tears falling straight down.

He had heard this voice for two years, and only now, in retrospect, did he suddenly realize that it was different from the voice he had before their fallout three years ago.

Three years ago, his brother’s voice was neither so gentle nor so gloomy; it was a gentleness with a hint of coldness.

“Hmph! So what if he’s a freshman, so what if he’s an adult, that means he can freely go in and out of bars! Go to those… *stinky air* places and mess around!”

The gloomy voice suddenly rose, startling Dr. Qin, who was standing nearby.

“Then what can I do? Wasn’t it precisely because I interfered too much in the past that he rebelled, and in the end…”

“If you ask me, you should tie him up, lock him in a room, and make him reflect properly!”

“No, do you want what happened half a year ago to happen again! Little Mo was in a coma for a month, and almost didn’t wake up!”

“Then you’re just going to watch him get a boyfriend? Watch him degenerate? Watch him drift further and further away from you?”

The gloomy voice was sharp and shrill, full of anger, like a trapped beast roaring!

The gentle voice took a long time to reply, “No matter what, I can’t hurt Little Mo again. As long as he’s happy and safe, I’ll do anything!”

“One day, you’ll regret it!”

“I won’t!”

Jin Baiyan in the video didn’t say anything more, his body tilted, and he fell to the ground.

Dr. Qin walked around Jin Baiyan, and seeing that he was unconscious, he pulled him up and placed him on a chair.

Jin Mo reached out, stroking Jin Baiyan’s bloodless face through the screen.

So, he was the source of his brother’s onset.

He had been avoiding the events of three years ago, not wanting to recall the content of their argument, and not wanting to think about the reasons behind their argument.

The memories that had been suppressed for three years were awakened by this video.

On a certain weekend three years ago, he had just returned from school and was originally happily planning to give Jin Baiyan a surprise, but he unexpectedly overheard a shock.

At that time, he and Jin Baiyan still lived in the Jin family’s old house.

“Huaiyang, next week is Qingqing and Baiyan’s engagement ceremony, can you check if there’s anything missing from this list?”

Jin Mother’s voice came from inside the room, causing him to stop, and then his pupils dilated in shock.

His brother was going to get engaged to Pei Qingqing!

The date was actually next week!

He didn’t even know!

In an instant, he felt bone-chilling coldness! A sense of despair as if the sky had fallen.

He didn’t listen to the rest of the conversation but turned and left the Jin family’s old house.

That night, he didn’t return to school, nor did he go home.

Jin Baiyan called him countless times, but he didn’t answer any of them.

He sat by Tianxin Lake all night!

He couldn’t understand why his brother would hide his engagement to Pei Qingqing from him!

Disappointment, resentment, jealousy, betrayal, sadness…

All sorts of feelings filled his body!

In the end, only one thought remained!

Jin Baiyan had abandoned him, so he didn’t want him anymore!

The next morning, he dragged his cold and stiff body back to school and slept in the dormitory all day.

It wasn’t until the evening, when the other students returned, that they found him.

“Your brother is looking for you like crazy!”

“Hurry up and call your brother back!”

“No, I’ll tell your brother!”

…

At that time, his head was dizzy, and he didn’t want to hear anything about his brother.

He climbed down from the bed and rushed straight out of the dormitory, wanting to find a quiet place to be alone.

However, things didn’t go as planned.

He met Jin Baiyan, who was looking for him, at the school gate.

The Jin Baiyan at that time was not the gentle Jin Baiyan he later became.

As soon as he saw Jin Mo, he grabbed him urgently and roared at him.

“Where did you go? I’ve been looking for you like crazy! You’re so old, and you don’t even bother to let anyone know you’re safe.”

Jin Baiyan’s eyes were bloodshot, his hair was messy, and he hadn’t even had time to shave the stubble on his chin, clearly, he was really worried.

After three years, Jin Mo could still clearly recall Jin Baiyan’s appearance at that time.

However, the feeling then was completely different from the feeling now.

At that time, his mind was full of: I don’t want you as my brother! You’re a liar! I don’t want you to control me anymore!

Things then went in an uncontrollable direction, like a runaway train.