Suo Qingjun Chapter 91
byfind belonging
When we came out of Tongzi Tower, the sky was completely bright. The sunshine was spreading in the old alley, and even the wind was a little softer.
Mother Lin took Lin Xingmian’s hand, warned her again and again, and thanked Qing Feng’an and the others again and again. She didn’t slowly close the door until she saw them walking away.
This time, there are no worries behind the door, only steadiness.
Lin Xingmian followed behind the three of them, his steps much lighter, no longer as vain as before, ready to collapse at any moment.
Qing Feng’an walked beside him, looking sideways at him from time to time, and said in a gentle tone: “Come back to the apartment with us first, take a good rest, don’t worry about anything else.”
Xu Baiyan immediately answered: “Yes, go back and take a shower and have a hot meal. It’s better than anything else. Don’t stay in that shabby place of yours. If you miss your mother in the future, we will go back with you to see you. Just stay with us on a regular basis.”
Jin Xianling didn’t say much, just leaned closer to him, as if silently telling him – there is someone with you, don’t be afraid.
Lin Xingmian said “Hmm” softly, her voice was very soft, but it was calmer than ever before.
He never dared to think that one day he would be able to follow a few people and walk into a place that truly belonged to them, without having to be wary, calculating, or watching their faces carefully.
The car was parked under an ordinary apartment building. It was not luxurious, but it was clean and tidy, with a relaxing atmosphere.
The moment he entered the door, Lin Xingmian paused subconsciously and clenched the corners of his clothes awkwardly.
This is their place. He is a latecomer, someone who has gotten into trouble and lied. He is afraid that he will not fit in.
Qing Feng’an seemed to have read through his mind and patted his shoulder gently: “Come in, this is where you can stay in the future.”
Xu Baiyan calmly sat down on the sofa and waved his hand: “Don’t stand there. Just treat it as your own home. There are no restrictions. We don’t eat people.”
Jin Xianling had already turned around and entered the kitchen, probably to see what she could make for breakfast.
Lin Xingmian walked in slowly and looked around.
The living room is not big, the sofa is soft, there are a few books and a random remote control on the coffee table, and a few clean clothes are hanging on the balcony. Everything is ordinary, but there is popularity everywhere.
It’s not a cold hotel or a cramped tower, it’s a place with people living and breathing.
As soon as he sat down on the sofa, there was the sound of a key turning at the door.
Xu Baiyan’s eyes lit up: “It must be Song Xu!”
The door was pushed open, and Song Xu stood at the door, carrying a bit of the breeze outside, his expression calmer than usual, but less alienated.
He glanced across the room, and his first sight fell on Lin Xingmian. He paused and said calmly: “I’m back.”
Lin Xingmian’s heart tightened, and she subconsciously stood up, curling her fingers slightly.
He always felt the most guilty and indebted to Song Xu, and was the most afraid to look directly at him.
But this time, Song Xu didn’t feel cold at all, nor did he say any words of accountability. He just closed the door naturally and walked in.
“Things have been taken care of.” Song Xu said in a calm voice, “No one will trouble you again in the future, and no one will threaten you with your mother.”
One sentence, an understatement, completely relaxed Lin Xingmian’s last tense string.
Qing Feng’an smiled: “Just in time, we are going to have something to eat together.”
Jin Xianling poked her head out of the kitchen and said concisely: “The porridge is almost ready.”
Xu Baiyan jumped up immediately: “I’m going to set the dishes and chopsticks! Get an extra pair, and Xing Mian will come with you.”
Lin Xingmian stood there, feeling a little at a loss for a moment.
He thought that he was at most a sheltered person, a trouble, and an outsider, but he never thought that they would give him a set of dishes and chopsticks so naturally.
The dining table is not big, but the four people turned into five people, which actually makes it more lively.
Jin Xianling brought out soft and glutinous white porridge, a few plates of light side dishes, and warm milk. It was simple but heart-warming.
Xu Baiyan quickly arranged the dishes, filled the porridge, and pushed it in front of Lin Xingmian: “Eat quickly, you have been hungry for so long, and you need to recuperate your stomach first.”
Qing Feng’an looked at him and said in a gentle tone: “Eat slowly, don’t be in a hurry.”
Jin Xianling silently pushed the plate of side dishes near him towards him.
Song Xu picked up the spoon, took a sip of the porridge, and then spoke calmly, his eyes falling on Lin Xingmian: “I won’t talk about the past. I just need to be safe when I come back.”
Lin Xingmian held the spoon, her fingertips trembling slightly.
He lowered his head, the heat of the porridge blurring his vision. Tears almost fell, but he held them back.
He had lied to them, used them, pushed himself into a corner, and almost dragged them into trouble.
But they didn’t blame him, didn’t drive him away, and didn’t treat him as an outsider.
Just let him sit together quietly and have a hot meal.
Xu Baiyan saw that he didn’t move for a long time, thinking that he was still awkward. He curled his lips, but his tone softened: “Don’t always act like you want to cry or not. We didn’t say we don’t want you. Even if you were wrong in the past, that’s in the past. Just be good in the future.”
Qing Feng’an nodded lightly: “Yes, let the past go. From now on, you will be with us. If you have any difficulties, you can talk about it. You can talk about what is on your mind. You don’t have to carry it alone.”
Jin Xianling added lightly: “If something happens, let’s take care of it together.”
Song Xu put down the spoon and looked at Lin Xingmian, his eyes serious but not threatening: “You are not a trouble, nor a burden. From today on, you are on our side.”
The words “our people here” were soft and delicate, but they hit Lin Xingmian’s heart and made the tip of his nose sore.
He used to live in darkness, surrounded by walls, with no one who could tell the truth, and he didn’t even dare to think that he would have “people on this side.”
Lin Xingmian raised his head, his eyes were slightly red, but he tried his best to smile very softly, his voice was hoarse but serious:
“I…I will never lie to you again, run around by myself, or cause you any more trouble.”
Xu Baiyan sneered, but there was warmth in his smile: “No one wants you not to cause trouble. If you dare not say anything if something happens, I will still scold you. Remember, you are not allowed to push yourself to death alone in the future.”
Qing Feng’an said gently: “Don’t be cautious, just be yourself. We accept you, not Lin Xingmian who is always trying to please you.”
Song Xu looked at him and said in a calm but determined tone: “Stay with peace of mind. There is a place for you here.”
A simple breakfast, no delicacies, no polite scenes, just a few bowls of hot porridge, a few plates of side dishes, five people sitting together.
The sun shone in through the window, falling on the dining table and on everyone. It was so warm that people didn’t want to talk, they just wanted to remember this moment.
Lin Xingmian sipped the porridge, and the warmth slid down her throat into her stomach, warming her heart all the way.
He finally understood that he was not alone.
Qing Fengan’s tolerance, Jin Xianling’s silent protection, Xu Baiyan’s hard mouth and soft heart, Song Xu’s calm support…
These people really regarded him as their friend and one of their own.
After eating, Xu Baiyan took the initiative to clear away the dishes, Jin Xianling went in to help, and Qing Feng sat on the sofa and poured a glass of warm water for Lin Xingmian.
Song Xu leaned against the window, looked outside, and suddenly said softly: “I said hello to the people at the flower shop. If you want to go and help in the future, you can always do it. It doesn’t matter if you don’t want to go. Take good care of yourself first.”
Lin Xingmian held the water glass, feeling the warmth from her fingertips, and nodded vigorously: “I want to go… I want to do a good job and not drag you down.”
Qing Feng’an smiled: “It’s not a burden, we just live together.”
That whole day, the apartment was quiet, but there was a sense of security everywhere.
Some were watching TV, some were reading, and some were basking in the sun on the balcony. Lin Xingmian sat in the middle. For the first time, he didn’t have to tense up, be on guard, or be ready to escape at any time.
He can sit quietly, listen to them talk, watch them busy, and feel that he is accepted, tolerated, and taken into consideration.
In the evening, Xu Baiyan suddenly clapped his hands: “I’ll cook tonight. I’ll cook a few more dishes and have a good meal. Just treat it as… welcoming Xing Mian to officially join the team.”
Jin Xianling raised her eyes: “I’ll help you.”
Qing Feng’an laughed: “Then I will be responsible for setting the table.”
Song Xu responded calmly: “I’m going to buy something.”
Lin Xingmian’s eyes started to heat up again as he watched them all assign things naturally.
When it gets dark, hot dishes are placed on the table.
Five people sat together, the lights were soft, and the food was fragrant.
There were no unnecessary words, no solemn ceremonies, just eating, chatting and joking together in a normal way.
Lin Xingmian picked up a mouthful of vegetables and chewed it slowly, feeling at ease.
Halfway through the meal, Lin Xingmian put down his chopsticks, looked at the four of them seriously, and said softly but clearly:
“Thank you… for wanting me.”
Xu Baiyan rolled her eyes at him, but smiled and gave him a chopstick of food: “Nonsense, we have recognized you a long time ago, otherwise why would we bring you back?”
Qing Feng’an nodded gently: “We will all be a family from now on.”
Jin Xianling said a faint “hmm”, which was the most serious response.
Song Xu looked at him, with a faint smile flashing in his eyes: “Eat well, the days will be long in the future.”
Lin Xingmian smiled. This time, he smiled easily and openly, with light in his eyes.
After the meal, Xu Baiyan shouted to wash the dishes. Jin Xianling walked into the kitchen without saying a word to help. Qing Fengan handed Lin Xingmian a set of clean pajamas and pointed to the direction of the bathroom: “Go take a hot bath first, wash off the moisture on your body, and get some rest early.”
“Yeah.” Lin Xingmian took the pajamas, her fingertips touched the soft fabric, and her heart trembled slightly.
He walked into the bathroom, and hot water poured down, washing away the dust along the way.
Until this moment, he really felt that he was “alive” – not lingering in the tube tower that could collapse at any time, but in a warm and safe place.
After taking a shower, he came out wrapped in a bath towel, his hair still a little damp.
As soon as he walked out of the bathroom door, Xu Baiyan pulled him over: “Come on, let’s blow dry your hair.”
Xu Baiyan held the hair dryer, and his technique was not very professional. He blew it softly, but he said, “From now on, you will treat this place as your own home. You can do whatever you want. I have tidied up the room for you. It’s right next door.”
Lin Xingmian lowered his head and responded softly: “Okay.”
After blowing his hair, Qing Feng’an opened the door for him: “It’s all packed up. The bedding is freshly dried and smells of the sun. If it’s cold at night, there’s a blanket on the sofa. You can take it at any time.”
Lin Xingmian opened the door and was stunned for a moment.
The room is not big, but it is well decorated.
There was a single bed placed by the window, and a pot of small green radish was placed on the table, which was somewhat similar to the ones his mother raised.
There is a very simple poster on the wall. It is a group photo of several people taken together. The sun is bright and the smiles are clean.
“This…” Lin Xingmian was a little at a loss, “Am I too much trouble for you?”
“What’s the trouble?” Xu Baiyan leaned against the door frame and raised his eyebrows, “Welcome to join our team, this is the move-in gift. From now on, you, me, Brother An, Brother Ling, and Song Xu who just came back, the five of us will live together in this apartment.”
Jin Xianling brought in a glass of warm milk from outside and put it on the table: “Drink it to help you sleep.”
Song Xu stood by the balcony, looked back at him, and said in a very calm tone: “Don’t be restrained, no one here will drive you away.”
Lin Xingmian looked at the milk on the table, the plain room, and the four people standing at the door, and her eyes started to heat up slightly.
He clutched the cup, his fingertips turned white, but he still smiled: “Thank you.”
Qing Feng’an gently rubbed his head, like coaxing a wronged child: “Good night, tomorrow will be a new day.”
“Yeah.” Lin Xingmian nodded.
Several people left one after another, and the door was gently closed.
He was the only one left in the room, the light was soft, and there was a faint smell of milk and sunshine in the air.
Lin Xingmian climbed onto the bed and lay down on the soft quilt.
This is not an old bed with a musty smell, but a bed that can really make people sleep peacefully.
He reached out and touched the pillow, feeling that the stone that had been hanging in his heart for a long time finally landed firmly on the ground.
Banxia novel, a lot of fun