Suo Qingjun Chapter 14
byImprisoning the Crane, Locking the Heart
The morning light grew stronger, and the spiritual mist completely dissipated. The bluestone path of Qihe Peak was warmed by the sun, yet it could not penetrate the chill within Jin Xianling’s courtyard.
Qing Feng’an leaned against the headboard, his gaze falling upon the moon-white longsword hanging by the window. The sword tassel dangled, swaying gently with the breeze, stirring memories of his past training—back then, Jin Xianling was still young and loved to stand aside and watch. His eyes were full of admiration and longing, and he would hand over warm tea when Qing Feng’an sheathed his sword, asking softly, “Master, when will I be as powerful as you?”
But now, that innocent youth had become an obsessive man who imprisoned him within this small space.
He slowly raised his hand, his fingertips resting on his own pulse. The flow of his internal energy remained sluggish. Jin Xianling’s acupoint sealing technique was peculiar; it was not a common martial arts technique but felt more like a sinister restriction that prevented him from smoothly mobilizing his True Qi. Last night’s indulgence had severely depleted his vitality, and even a slight exertion now made his head swim.
“What is Master looking at?”
Jin Xianling entered the room carrying breakfast. On the tray were light porridge, side dishes, and a plate of nourishing pastries—all of Qing Feng’an’s favorites. He placed the tray on the small table by the bed and sat on the edge of the mattress. His gaze followed Qing Feng’an’s to the longsword. A flicker of complex emotion crossed his eyes before being replaced by obsession.
“If Master wishes to practice the sword, I will accompany you once you are feeling better.” He picked up a spoon, scooped some porridge, blew on it to cool it, and held it to Qing Feng’an’s lips. “But Master must promise me not to point your sword at me again, and certainly not to think of using it to break down the courtyard gate and escape.”
Qing Feng’an turned his head away, refusing to eat. Now a prisoner who had lost all dignity, he was unwilling to accept this shackled care.
Jin Xianling’s eyes darkened, but he did not flare up like he had the previous night. He set down the spoon and gently brushed his fingertips over the red marks on Qing Feng’an’s cheek. His voice was low and lingering. “Master, why must you make things difficult for yourself? By refusing to eat or drink, you only hurt your own body. It pains my heart.”
“If you truly do not want me to feed you, then eat by yourself.” He pushed the dishes toward Qing Feng’an, his tone carrying a hint of compromise. “I won’t force you, as long as you live well and stay by my side.”
Having said that, he rose and walked to the window, standing with his back to Qing Feng’an. The hem of his black robe trailed on the floor, outlining a tall yet lonely silhouette. “Master, I know you still resent me. But I had no choice. Other than trapping you by my side, I could find no other way to keep you.”
“Years ago, when you were seriously injured and unconscious for three months to save that so-called Leader of the Righteous Alliance, I stayed by your bedside, praying day and night for you to wake up. But the first thing you did upon waking was to instruct me to prioritize the common people and not act impulsively.” His voice carried a hint of a sob. “The common people? When did Master ever care about the common people of this disciple?”
“My feelings for you have never been those of a disciple for a master. Three years ago by the cold pool, I wanted to tell you that I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you. But your eyes held only the Way of the Sword and the common people; you couldn’t see me at all.”
“Now that my martial arts are perfected, I can protect you and keep you by my side. Why can’t Master just turn around and look at me?”
Qing Feng’an closed his eyes, listening to the accusations with a heart full of mixed emotions. He had never imagined that his lifelong teachings and expectations would be perceived as neglect and indifference by Jin Xianling. He did indeed care for the common people, and he truly regarded Jin Xianling as his most prized disciple, teaching him everything and nurturing him with care. He never dreamed that this bond of master and disciple had long since twisted into a paranoid obsession in Jin Xianling’s heart.
“There is a distinction between master and disciple; there is an order to ethics and morality.” Qing Feng’an’s voice was soft, yet it carried an undeniable firmness. “Jin Xianling, wake up. What you feel for me is not love, but an obsession.”
“What if it is an obsession?” Jin Xianling turned around abruptly, his eyes swirling with a frantic love. “As long as I can keep you, I would gladly embrace it even if it is an obsession. Master, you will eventually understand that in this world, only my feelings for you are the purest and most sincere.”
He walked slowly toward the bed, leaning down close to Qing Feng’an until his nose almost touched the other’s forehead. “I have already ordered Qihe Peak to be sealed off. No one from the outside can enter, and no one from the inside can leave. Master, give up any thought of escaping. Stay by my side peacefully as my lover, my only concern.”
Qing Feng’an felt a surge of suffocation. He jerked his head away, but Jin Xianling pinched his chin, forcing him to meet his gaze. Those deep eyes reflected his pale face and an unshakeable possessiveness.
“Master, don’t push me anymore.” Jin Xianling’s tone held a hint of warning. “I don’t want to lay hands on you again, and I certainly don’t want to see you hurt. Be obedient, and we can be just as we were before—only no longer as master and disciple, but as companions for life.”
His kiss fell upon Qing Feng’an’s lips, carrying an irresistible plunder and lingering heat. Qing Feng’an struggled with all his might, but due to his lack of internal energy, he could only let the other have his way. The bitterness and humiliation intertwined between his teeth, making him feel as though he might faint.