MTMIO Chapter 87

Chapter 87: Sitting Alone in a Small Boat

Grandma and Auntie Liu got up, and when they came out of the room, they heard rustling sounds downstairs. They leaned on the railing and looked down.

Lu You was tearing open a bag of quinoa toast, eating it while wandering around the living room, looking around as if searching for something.

The little Bichon Frise followed her, its four paws pattering on the floor.

“What are you looking for?” Grandma asked, “When did you get back?”

Lu You looked up, swallowed the bread in her mouth, her voice hoarse and weak: “Just got back, my blue suitcase, have you seen it? I remember putting it in the living room.”

Auntie Liu said: “It’s in your room.”

She looked at Lu You, her lips moved, as if she still had something to say, but she didn’t speak.

“Where are you planning to go?” Grandma asked as she walked downstairs.

Lu You said: “Feifei’s hometown, I’m going to find her and play for a few days.”

“Feifei went back to her hometown? Didn’t she say she was taking her mother around?” Grandma was slightly surprised.

“I don’t know, she said her mother suddenly wanted to go back.”

Grandma’s expression froze for a few seconds, and she hesitantly asked: “How is her mother’s illness being treated?”

Lu You shook her head, partly because she didn’t know, and partly because she wasn’t optimistic.

Grandma sighed silently.

As if sighing at someone else’s inevitable fate.

“How many days are you planning to play there?” Grandma asked.

Walking to the dining table, Lu You picked up the kettle with her left hand and poured water into the cup. Hearing this, her hand stopped.

Her little finger was slightly raised, without the pinky ring to cover it, the scar was like it had broken free from its constraints, twisted and conspicuously coiled on her knuckle.

Her gaze fell there, and Lu You remembered the stepmother who left her with this scar.

She was the one among Lu Huai’an’s constantly changing women who most resembled Zhang Wenyin.

In fact, at first, her stepmother wasn’t bad to her. It was only after seeing a photo of Zhang Wenyin one day that she changed, becoming more and more neurotic, more and more hysterical.

She still remembered the last time they met, the woman covered her face and sobbed to the policewoman: “The first time I came to her house, her dad gave me shoe covers, but she gave me slippers. On the wedding day, I didn’t eat anything all day, and my blood sugar was so low. She gave me two candies and gave me her share of KFC. When I had a fever, she didn’t sleep all night and used her dad’s liquor to cool me down. I really thought about treating her like a daughter. Why did it turn out like this? Why did it become like this?”

The policewoman said: “It’s no use regretting it, but please remember this regret, please always remember, don’t forget all the good things about the other person the moment your emotions come up, even if there’s only a little bit of reason, you have to catch it, restrain yourself, and don’t do things that will make you regret it.”

She didn’t know if that woman remembered it.

Lu You remembered it clearly.

So, she thought, she had to at least stay until she could calmly make a decision.

And she couldn’t determine the specific date.

“It might be a while, not too short, but probably not too long.” The water was almost overflowing the cup, and Lu You put down the kettle. “I’ll try to adjust as soon as possible and come back soon…”

Grandma walked to her side, raised her hand and touched her head, smoothing her long hair down. “Grandma’s not trying to rush you, just wants to have an idea. Feifei’s hometown has beautiful scenery, go see the mountains and rivers, and when you feel better, more open-minded, and think things through, then come back…”

Lu You understood the unfinished meaning in the end. It was to come back and solve a bunch of complicated emotional problems.

“So tired, I’m going to take a shower and sleep for a while.”

Grandma patted her shoulder, and when she withdrew her hand, she suddenly thought to ask: “Are you leaving today?”

“Yeah, I’ll leave after I wake up, I’m planning to take the high-speed train.” Lu You raised her hand, paused suddenly, and her gaze fell into the watch face, but didn’t focus on the hands.

Unconsciously, she had become accustomed to looking at her watch to confirm the time.

–“My time is all with you.”

–“The power of decision is with you.”

So similar words, but they gave people completely different feelings.

The feeling of the watch band clasping on her hand suddenly became extremely clear, as if it was about to embed itself in her flesh.

So tight, so painful.

Lu You put down the unfinished toast on the dining table and slowly began to unfasten the watch band.

“Then buy the ticket first, buy it and then go to sleep, if you buy it early, you can still get a seat.”

Seeing her expressionlessly unfastening the watch band and stuffing the watch into her coat pocket, Grandma paused for a few seconds before saying, “Keep an eye on the time, set an alarm, don’t oversleep.”

Lu You “Mm”ed.

“You and Yunxi… are you two fighting?” Grandma asked.

Because the way she stuffed the watch into her pocket just now was like writing “I’m unhappy because of Yue Yunxi” all over her face.

“Grandma… please don’t mention her to me for now.” Lu You ordered the ticket on her phone.

Grandma opened her mouth, hesitated for a long time, but still couldn’t help asking: “What’s the matter? Is it because of yester–”

“Grandma.” Lu You helplessly stopped her from mentioning yesterday, “I’ve booked the ticket, Auntie Liu–if I haven’t left the room by one o’clock, please come upstairs and wake me up.”

Auntie Liu responded with an “Okay.”

Lu You went straight upstairs.

Back in the room, she took a shower, and collapsed into the bedding, only to remember that her little deer doll was still in that messy bag, and the bag was downstairs.

Too lazy to get up and get it.

In this way, negative emotions such as grievances and collapse surged up because her Abebe wasn’t there.

Her hand slowly clenched the bed sheet, pulling out a deep wrinkle. Through the thin material, her fingertips pinched her knuckles.

Tears seeped into the bed sheet.

The physiological pain slowly and arduously covered the pain that surged up from the depths.

Unfortunately, there was no substitute, only entanglement.

She seemed to be trapped in quicksand, her breathing was blocked, and her throat was dry and painful.

Fortunately, she was very tired. This tormenting state didn’t last long. Soon, there was no consciousness, no thoughts, no emotions.

Not even a dream, only a formatted blank.

The alarm rang and was unconsciously turned off by her.

It wasn’t until Auntie Liu came to knock on the door that Lu You struggled to open her eyes from her drowsiness. Her first reaction was to look at her watch. Her hand was empty. She was stunned for a moment, and then looked at her phone.

Instantly awake, she sat up and threw off the quilt, getting out of bed, “Help!”

Auntie Liu was about to leave, but she was startled by this sound and hurriedly turned back, not bothering to knock on the door, and pushed the door open directly.

Lu You put on her clothes, scooped out a head of long hair pressed under her collar, and said in a semi-spoiled and semi-complaining tone: “Auntie Liu… didn’t you say that if I didn’t leave the room by one o’clock, you would wake me up? Why did you come at twenty past?”

“I saw you looked so tired, with dark circles under your eyes. I wanted you to sleep a little longer.”

Lu You sneezed.

Auntie Liu glanced at the half-open window, and the cold wind was pouring into the room. She was about to walk over to close the window.

“Leave it open, let it air out.” Lu You stopped her and pleaded, “Auntie Liu, please help me, I won’t have time to pack…”

Lu You grabbed the handle of the suitcase and laid it down, but her movements stalled.

The weight wasn’t right.

She frowned and pulled the zipper.

“There’s plenty of time. That luggage, Teacher Yue has already packed it almost.”

The moment Auntie Liu said “Teacher Yue,” the suitcase was completely opened.

Lu You was stunned.

The suitcase was packed full. She roughly flipped through it.

The little deer doll, the sheet music she planned to play for her next competition, the clothes she usually wore, the steam eye masks she needed when her eyes were tired, the sanitary napkins she needed when her period was coming, the water cup she always took with her when she went out, earplugs…

At the same time, Auntie Liu said: “Yesterday, Teacher Yue said that maybe you needed to go out and relax, and she was worried that you wouldn’t be in a good state and would forget something when you packed your things yourself, so she stayed here and helped me pack for you.”

No wonder Yue Yunxi hadn’t gone back yet when she arrived yesterday.

She really understood her to the point of being thorough.

Lu You hugged the little deer doll and squatted in front of the suitcase, with mixed feelings.

She didn’t know whether she should be happy to be taken care of so thoughtfully, or whether she should be unconvinced and unwilling, because everything about her was within that person’s expectations and control.

“See if there’s anything missing, and add it.” Auntie Liu said.

The things in the suitcase were neatly arranged. Judging from Yue Yunxi’s thoughtfulness, she was afraid that she had thought of everything she could think of and couldn’t think of, and put it in there.

Like an umbrella.

She could even stuff it into the corner for her.

“I’m going to cook noodles for you.” Auntie Liu said, and prepared to leave.

“Hey, Auntie Liu.” Lu You called her to stop, took out the umbrella and asked, “Where’s the bag I originally used to put this umbrella?”

Auntie Liu said: “It’s in the interlayer. Teacher Yue said that it’s troublesome to carry a suitcase. You might carry a smaller bag. When you don’t have a suitcase, you like a bigger bag when you’re out for a long time, so she put it in the suitcase for you.”

“…”

So annoying,

This person.

Lu You pulled open the zipper of the interlayer, took out the bag, and opened it to take a look. “Where’s that blue folder inside? Is it also in the suitcase?”

Auntie Liu thought for a while and shook her head, “It’s taken out. Are you going to take it with you? I’ll go get it for you.”

–“Never mind, it’s not important anymore.”

Thinking of Yue Yunxi’s own attitude towards the folder, Lu You bit her lip and said, “Never mind.”

Auntie Liu responded with an okay, and when she was about to walk out of the door, Lu You called her to stop again, with a bit of shyness: “That… I’ll still take it with me.”

“Okay, I’ll go get it for you.”

“Never mind, never mind… I’m not taking it after all.”

“Okay.”

“Hey–”

“.”

Auntie Liu ignored her and turned around to leave.

Lu You sat down on the edge of the bed dejectedly, holding the deer ears of the doll, and stared at the open suitcase.

She inexplicably thought of the beginning of her truly getting closer to Yue Yunxi—going to listen to that public rehearsal.

Her mood at the moment was very similar to the Ravel’s La Valse she heard at that time.

It was like a cluster of fire burning in the heavy snow, about to rise but not rising, about to be extinguished but not extinguished.

Before long, Auntie Liu brought the blue folder over, saying that Yue Yunxi was also so conflicted about this folder when she was packing yesterday.

“Put it in the suitcase, take it out, then put it in again, and finally take it out again, ready to take it away, but it fell on the entrance cabinet, and then I put it in the cabinet.”

“If this wasn’t really a folder, I would have thought it was a hot potato in the shape of a folder!”

After throwing down this humorous complaint, Auntie Liu really left this time.

The sound of the door closing fell softly into the wind.

Lu You grabbed this “hot potato” and re-enacted the actions of Auntie Liu describing Yue Yunxi in another form.

Open, close, throw it into the suitcase, pull it out, open it, close it…

Finally, she casually threw the folder into the suitcase.

She couldn’t see anything at the moment, and her current state wasn’t suitable for seeing it either. It would only make her emotions complicated and difficult to digest.

Since it wasn’t important anyway, she wasn’t afraid to open it two days later.

The phone on the bedside table vibrated, and Lu You picked it up to look.

Chen Feifei sent a message: [My dear Lu Bao, what time is your ticket? I had my motorcycle serviced, and I bought you a helmet, hum hum, I’ll drive it to pick you up then, we’ll be the prettiest girls in the village [cool]]

[Lu]: [Two thirty]

Chen Feifei: [By the way, bring warm clothes, it’s freezing in the countryside [shivering]]

Her gaze swept over the suitcase and returned to the phone screen.

Lu You asked straight to the point: [Yesterday, was it Yue Yunxi who asked you to come to me and tell me that you were in your hometown, and asked me to go to you to play?]

After two or three minutes, Chen Feifei sent a reply: [Yeah, Goddess said you were in a bad mood. Originally, she wanted me to invite you to travel together, but I said I was in my hometown. She asked me if you had ever been to my hometown before. I said I had, fishing and catching crabs, it was a lot of fun. She asked me to call you to come to my hometown to play, and she also sent me a super big red envelope, telling me to buy tonics for my mother and prepare some desserts for you by the way.]

Chen Feifei: [[Smirking] If it wasn’t for my goddess, I would have exposed her directly! Buying tonics for my mother is the main thing! By the way, I bought you a lot of desserts.]

Chen Feifei: [She also prepared a lot of snacks for you, and had them delivered by the same city. There were so many, lol. If she wasn’t feeding you like a pig, there would definitely be some for me. I ate some in advance, hehe~]

Lu You: “…”

Chen Feifei: [By the way, why are you in a bad mood?]

[Lu]: [Didn’t she tell you?]

Chen Feifei: [No, I asked her, and she told me to talk to you myself, to see if you wanted to say it.]

Lu You clenched her phone, speechless for a moment.

Chen Feifei: [[Picture]]

Chen Feifei: [Look, my mom specially prepared a big floral quilt for you hahaha, at night we’ll each have a quilt tunnel, if you want to talk, the night is long, we’ll talk slowly, if you don’t want to talk, we’ll watch variety shows together.]

Lu You curved the corners of her mouth very slightly, temporarily putting aside her cluttered thoughts and complicated mood in Chen Feifei’s words.

This mood was like a spider web, messy cotton silk. When you brushed it away, it would Twiston your body, and before you could straighten it out, a new web would be woven again.

Just like at this moment.

She accidentally pressed the deer horn and heard the recording inside. Those two lines of lyrics were replaced with a new one–

“If you want to escape, then I’ll help you pack your luggage, but… remember to come back.”

Even more annoying.

This person.

She pressed the other recording deer horn, wanting to say something to replace this sentence.

The cold wind poured in through the half-open window, causing the window frame to rattle slightly. Maybe she was too hungry, she felt a little dizzy.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, in the damp wind, she seemed to be sitting alone in a small boat, and the tides from all directions were pushing her in the same direction.

At that end, whether in the sky or in the water, there was a moon with its waxing and waning phases.

Finally, in the strength of grasping and releasing, she recorded a lengthy silence.