RMACAUH Chapter 51
by VolareChapter 51 This Deep-Seated Adoration Had Long Become…
Chu Lingqiao looked at him, his eyes filled with nothing but heartache. “You… are your family not good to you?”
Feng Chao was stunned for a moment. No one had ever asked him such a question. Family… it was something distant to him, a luxury he had once yearned for but never received.
“I have many brothers and sisters. Besides my official wife, my father has many concubines, each with their own offspring. Although the family business is large, there are too many monks and not enough porridge. How much one can get depends on their own abilities.”
A gust of cold wind blew in, and raindrops drifted under the eaves, dampening Feng Chao’s temples and right cheek. Chu Lingqiao raised his sleeve to shield him from the rain. The gesture was somewhat ambiguous, but neither of them avoided it.
“Young master, the carriage is here.” At this moment, Lin Huai hurried over with an umbrella, overjoyed to see Chu Lingqiao. “Oh, isn’t this Divine Doctor Chu? What good timing! Our young master’s illness hasn’t improved after taking so much medicine, and we’re really worried! And here you are!”
Chu Lingqiao forced a smile. “Yes, what a coincidence.”
Actually, it wasn’t a coincidence at all. He had closed his clinic in the capital and had been here for almost half a year, walking the streets and alleys every day to treat people and earn a living, hoping that one day he might meet him on the street.
He spent day after day with this expectation, and just as he was about to give up, he stood here and saw that person on the bridge, hardly daring to believe his eyes.
Finding something after wearing out iron shoes, it comes without any effort.
He didn’t know how many times he had walked past this place, never encountering him before, but it just so happened that today, in the misty rain, he inadvertently caught a glimpse and saw him.
It turned out that everything in the world has its fate and destiny, and one cannot force it by even a second.
“Get in my carriage?”
Chu Lingqiao’s ears turned red. “Okay.” He replied, following Feng Chao as if in a daze.
The carriage wasn’t large, and the two sat facing each other. Feng Chao poured tea for him. “My residence here is only a few miles from the bridgehead, so we’ll be there soon.”
“You…”
“Mm?”
“Do you live alone?”
“Of course not.”
Chu Lingqiao’s heart tightened. “Then who else is there?”
“Lin Huai lives with me as well.”
Hearing that it was Lin Huai, Chu Lingqiao breathed a sigh of relief. With his personality, who knew how many lovers he had?
Perhaps he shouldn’t have come looking for him. He knew it clearly in his heart, but his mind was filled with him, thinking about him in everything he did, and constantly dreaming about their night of pleasure, making him even more unclear-headed.
Now, he had little reason left. Even if he did nothing, just looking at him made him happy.
Chu Lingqiao held the teacup and sipped the tea, unable to hide the smile on his lips.
Feng Chao thought, “I don’t know what he’s so happy about. He’s been smiling foolishly ever since he got into the carriage. Was he always this silly?”
After getting out of the carriage, the rain lessened a lot. On the gloomy, rainy evening, it got dark quickly. Lin Huai entered the house and lit the lamps.
The residence was very ordinary. On both sides of the main room were east and west wing rooms. Behind the house was a backyard and a small kitchen. In the front yard, there was an osmanthus tree planted next to a small pond with water lilies and a few small fish.
It looked very simple and casual, but it revealed elegance and artistic conception everywhere.
Just like the owner of this residence, every move, every smile, had no unnecessary actions or embellishments, but was full of elegance and composure.
Chu Lingqiao followed him into the main house, which was filled with the scent of books and ink. The desk and bookshelves were full of books, disordered yet orderly.
“Just find a place to sit.”
“Okay.” Chu Lingqiao put down his medical kit and sat down on a bamboo chair.
Feng Chao took some clothes and walked behind the screen to quickly change out of his damp clothes.
Chu Lingqiao could only hear the rustling sound of the brocade rubbing behind the screen, but his mind began to run wild uncontrollably.
To stop these obscene thoughts, he began to recite the *Suwen* chapter.
“In the past, the Yellow Emperor was born with divine wisdom, able to speak when weak, understanding when young, kind and wise when grown, and ascended to heaven when mature…”
Feng Chao came out after changing his clothes and saw him muttering something with his eyes closed, and couldn’t help but wonder if he had encountered something incomprehensible on this trip?
“Doctor Chu?”
“Huh??”
“You seem to have something on your mind?”
“No,” Chu Lingqiao saw that he had changed into a light blue shirt and had taken off his hair crown, using only a green hairpin to casually tie his hair behind his head.
He was slender and elegant, and looked very graceful and handsome in this outfit.
Feng Chao ignored him and sat down at the desk, picking up some documents to review.
Chu Lingqiao wanted to talk to him more, but couldn’t find an opportunity at this time, seeing him so seriously working at his desk, thinking that he must have many matters waiting for him to handle.
No wonder he had become thinner, with so much pressure and not sleeping well. He wondered if Lin Huai was taking good care of him?
Chu Lingqiao quietly accompanied him in this way, watching him working at his desk until it was completely dark outside.
At this time, Lin Huai came from the backyard and smiled, “Young master, Doctor Chu, it’s time for dinner.”
Chu Lingqiao saw that Lin Huai was dressed plainly and didn’t look like someone who had been in the kitchen, so he asked, “Does someone cook at home?”
“We hired a local cook. She only cooks dinner every day, and goes back to her own home after she’s done.”
“I see.”
Feng Chao put down his brush and put away the documents, smiling, “Doctor Chu, let’s go eat together.”
“Thank you for the invitation.”
“It’s just some home-style dishes. Please forgive me for the inadequate hospitality.”
“Home-style dishes are fine.”
Three dishes and a soup, a total of four dishes. For an ordinary family, this was actually very good.
Chu Lingqiao tasted the food, and the cook’s cooking skills were very good.
At this time, the cook finished cleaning up in the back kitchen and came to the front house, bowing to Feng Chao. “Young master, I’ll go back first today. You can leave everything as it is after you’re done eating, and I’ll come back to clean up tomorrow morning.”
Feng Chao smiled and nodded. “Thank you for your trouble.”
“It’s my duty.”
The two sat quietly together, eating dinner. This feeling was very wonderful, making Chu Lingqiao’s heart feel settled and at home. He suddenly said, “The last time I ate like this with someone was ten years ago.”
Feng Chao: “This is the first time I’ve sat down to eat with someone like this. Who were you with ten years ago?”
“It was with my parents and my younger sister.”
Feng Chao’s heart tightened. “Where are they now?”
Chu Lingqiao swallowed the food in his throat with a hint of bitterness. “At that time, there were bandits causing trouble on the border. My parents and sister all died. I was lucky enough to be picked up by my master.”
“Your master?”
“He was a Taoist, a wandering cultivator with no name and no fixed abode. I followed him, traveling north and south, begging for alms and practicing medicine until I was eighteen. One morning when I woke up, he left a letter saying that our fate was over, and that I had to rely on myself in the future. He just left like that, and I never saw him again.”
“You must have been very sad, right?”
Chu Lingqiao couldn’t help but smile and shake his head. “Not very sad.”
“Why?”
“That’s just how my master was. He came and went like a free wind. The wind is formless. He couldn’t stop, and he wouldn’t stop for anyone. From the first day I followed him, he told me that he was a passerby in my life, perhaps due to a karmic connection from a previous life. In this life, he came to see me off and would leave after completing his mission.”
“It sounds like your master was truly an extraordinary person. His medical skills must have been very superb too, right?”
Speaking of this, Chu Lingqiao couldn’t help but laugh. “Not at all. He didn’t understand any medical skills, but he had some lost medical books. He supervised me every day, making me study hard. When I had learned something, he would take me to see patients, and most of the money from the consultations would be used to buy him wine and meat.”
“Hahahaha…” Feng Chao laughed out loud. “Interesting! Your master is truly a wonderful person, wonderful indeed!”
“Actually, sometimes I still miss him very much. I wonder if I’ll ever see him again in my lifetime.”
“If there is fate, you will definitely meet again.”
Chu Lingqiao stared at him with burning eyes. “You said this to me too. You also said that if we meet again, you would tell me your name.”
“My surname is Huang, and my given name is Feng Chao.” As he spoke, he dipped his finger in tea and wrote the name ‘Huang Feng Chao’ on the table.
“Feng Chao? A very nice name.”
“Lingqiao is also very nice. Did your parents give it to you?”
“The surname is my original surname, but the name was given to me by my master. He said that everything of yesterday is like yesterday’s death, and everything of today is like today’s birth. People come into this world to constantly experience and go through things. They must look forward and not look back at the past.”
“So, you let go of the hatred and started your life anew?”
“Yes. If I had been obsessed with hatred, I might not be in this world anymore, right? I would have tried to take revenge, but probably would have died along with my family.”
Feng Chao nodded thoughtfully. “You have now become a famous divine doctor, able to heal the wounded and rescue the dying, which is better than most people in this world.”
“Do you really think so?”
“Yes, your medical skills are very superb.” They were even slightly better than the imperial physician in the palace.
“How have you been feeling lately?”
“It’s just some old problems. You should know that.”
Chu Lingqiao frowned, looked solemn, and remained silent for a long time before saying, “How long can you stay here?”
“Probably about three years.”
“That’s enough.”
“Mm?”
“For these three years, I will treat your body. If you can cooperate with me in acupuncture and taking medicine, I can guarantee that you will be safe and sound for the next twenty years.”
“Then what about after twenty years?”
“You don’t need to consider those things. Anyway, as long as I’m here, you can live well.”
“Why are you suddenly so concerned about me?”
Chu Lingqiao felt a burst of frustration. He didn’t know if he was asking knowingly or if he simply didn’t care.
Perhaps in his eyes, that night didn’t count for anything at all.
“It’s getting late. I’ll go back to the inn first. Tomorrow…” He was just about to ask him when it would be convenient for him to come over tomorrow when Feng Chao pulled on his sleeve.
“Or, just stay?”
Chu Lingqiao’s heart pounded, and even his breathing trembled slightly. A person as clever as him should know what would happen if he asked him to stay so late.
Seeing him stunned, Feng Chao smiled and released his sleeve. “If you want to go back, there’s an umbrella at the door. You can take it and don’t need to return it.”
As he spoke, he turned around and went to his desk to continue looking at the documents.
Chu Lingqiao froze in place for a few breaths, then suddenly turned around and tightly embraced him from behind.
Feng Chao’s heart skipped a beat. A sourness mixed with sweetness filled his heart, which eventually turned into joy.
“I miss you, I miss you so much…” Chu Lingqiao pressed his cheek against his ear and rubbed against it, his voice hoarse and choked with emotion. “Actually, I’ve been in Chu Ting for almost half a year, but you didn’t tell me where you were.”
“To find you, I’ve been going out with my medicine kit every day to treat people, searching for your figure in the vast sea of people, and have been disappointed many times, until the longing gradually numbed me.”
“I thought you wouldn’t appear again. Actually, after tonight, I was preparing to go back, but God sent you to my eyes again.”
“Feng Chao, I’m very happy in my heart. I’ve never been so happy as I am today. I don’t know what I am to you in your heart. You…”
“If you just want to amuse yourself with me, to relieve these boring and empty days, then tell me clearly, and I will make plans early and won’t have too many delusions. Otherwise, in the end, I won’t be able to let go and it will become an unsolvable obsession.”
Feng Chao lowered his eyes, and said weakly, “You also know that I show myself as a man. My family has been fighting over the family property. If you insist on wanting me to give you an explanation, then it won’t be convenient for you to stay tonight. You should go back.”
Chu Lingqiao’s heart tightened. Reason told him that he should let go, but his hands hugged him even tighter unwillingly.
He finally understood that no matter what he said about making plans early, it was impossible to make any plans at all. This deep-seated adoration had long become an unsolvable obsession.
Like poison, it had already penetrated deep into his lungs, corroding his bones and breaking his heart.
He was unwilling in his heart, but he was retreating step by step. Unable to bear the separation, he could only let him amuse himself for pleasure.
Love in the world has always been like this, and sincerity is not always reciprocated with sincerity.
Feng Chao raised his hand and gently stroked the palms on his waist that were tightly holding him. “Why aren’t you talking?”
Chu Lingqiao’s voice was muffled. “I’m not leaving.”
“I didn’t chase you away. If you want to stay, you can naturally stay.”
“Feng Chao, I’ve never seen anyone who is better at playing with people’s hearts than you!”
Feng Chao laughed. “Since you knew, you shouldn’t have entered the game.”
“Then do you know how charming you are? You seduced me first, but you’re so unfeeling to me!”
Feng Chao turned around and cupped his cheeks, which were wet with tears. He raised his head and kissed his chin. The bitterness and saltiness of the tears made Feng Chao feel both heartache and amusement.
“Don’t cry. When have I been unfeeling to you? Don’t worry, I will definitely treat you well in the future.”
Chu Lingqiao closed his eyes and said nothing, his eyelashes still wet with tears, looking like a victim who had been ravaged.
“I’ll have Lin Huai get you hot water to bathe in. After you wash up, go wait for me in bed. I still have some accounts to go over, and I’ll be done soon.”
Chu Lingqiao nodded humbly, accepting the reality without backbone. Who told him he liked this person? What else could he do?
If he left, with Feng Chao’s personality, there would definitely be no future.
But he couldn’t let him go now. His master had said that man follows the earth, the earth follows heaven, heaven follows the Tao, and the Tao follows nature. Only when knowledge and action are united can one achieve the great Tao.
Chu Lingqiao took a bath, changed into clean underwear, and waited in bed for a long time. The candlelight flickered outside the curtain, but he was still at his desk, not moving.
After waiting for another quarter of an hour, Chu Lingqiao suddenly lifted the curtain, pursed his lips, and glared at Feng Chao without saying a word.
Feng Chao felt his resentment, and finally put down the documents in his hand, got up, blew out the candles, and walked to the bedside.
As soon as he reached the bedside, Feng Chao was pulled back into the curtain by a pair of large, dry hands.
Chu Lingqiao pressed him down, and his hurried kisses were both fierce and deep. Feng Chao gently rubbed his waist with his calf, seemingly to soothe his emotions.
Chu Lingqiao vented his long-accumulated longing, and his storm-like kisses gradually softened like a spring breeze and drizzle.
“Why are you in such a hurry?”
“I’ve been thinking about you for a long time. Tonight, you kept me waiting for half the night. You’re really bad!”
“It’s my fault. Don’t be angry with me, Doctor Chu, okay?”
He spoke to him in a sweet and coquettish tone, and Chu Lingqiao’s heart was about to be softened. How could he still be angry?
“A Chao…”
“A Chao?” Feng Chao savored this address carefully and whispered, “No one has ever called my name like that. You’re the first.”
“Then what do they call you?”
“When my mother was alive, she called me Chao’er. Everyone else just calls me young master.”
“A Chao, Chao’er, Chao’er~”
Feng Chao responded softly and hugged him tightly, without a gap between them.
“Lingqiao, I want you.”
Chu Lingqiao’s lower abdomen tightened, and a heat rushed from the soles of his feet straight to his head, making him feel restless and unbearable.
“If you can’t bear it later, just say so, and I won’t force you.” He knew his physical condition was not suitable for these things, so he had to exercise extreme restraint.
“Don’t talk nonsense!” Feng Chao grabbed his collar and pulled him towards him. Chu Lingqiao couldn’t bear it any longer and pressed him down fiercely, indulging in sensual pleasure.
*
Feng Yue wrote a letter in the study, to be sent to Nan Zhao for Alan.
The first one should be arriving soon.
Alan’s marriage to Nan Zhao was a fate that he couldn’t change at the time. In order to change his own fate, he had already been moving forward laboriously.
But since he already knew the ending of Alan’s previous life, he couldn’t sit idly by.
Alan would eventually choose to end his life by hanging herself, not because there was no way out, but because she couldn’t overcome the hurdle in her heart.
If these letters could become Alan’s spiritual support, in three years’ time, he would have the ability to lead his subordinates there and bring him back from there.
As he finished the last stroke, the study door was knocked.
“Enter.”
Xiao Feng walked in with a tray in his hands. He was now five months pregnant, and as it was early summer, the clothes he wore were thin and could no longer hide it.
“The kitchen made ice cream. I’ll bring you a bowl to cool down.”
Feng Yue’s tone was somewhat blame: “You should have asked the servants to do these things. Now that your body is inconvenient, what if you fall or bump yourself?”
“The doctor said that you can’t always stay in the house all day without moving. You still need to move around more. A teahouse opened in the city with singing, dancing, puppet shows, and acrobatics to watch. I’ve already made arrangements with A Cai to go see it tomorrow.”
“That place is…”
Before Feng Yue could finish speaking, Wei Xiaofeng nodded repeatedly. “I know! I won’t joke with my body.”
As he spoke, he pushed the ice cream closer to him. “Eat it quickly, or the ice will melt.”
Wei Xiaofeng smiled ingratiatingly, fearing that Feng Yue would still have people watch him tomorrow, not allowing this or that. He was really going to be suffocated!
Thinking of this, the fist under the table clenched tightly. No matter what, the travel plan for tomorrow would not change.
“Then take a few more followers.”
“Do I really have to take so many followers?”
“This time I won’t let them get too close, and I won’t control you too much.”
“Okay then.” Wei Xiaofeng reluctantly agreed.
Suddenly, Wei Xiaofeng saw the letter he had written to Feng Xilan on the table. It had his name written on it. “You’re going to send a letter to Alan?”
“There’s a Guangling caravan that goes to Nan Zhao every two months. Alan is there alone, unfamiliar with the place, so he must be very lonely. I write a letter every two months to comfort him.”
“When does the caravan leave?”
“The day after tomorrow.”
“Eat quickly, and after you’re done, come with me to the storage room. I want to pack some things to take to Alan.”
“Okay, okay, I’m eating.” Feng Yue stuffed his mouth full, looking helpless, his tongue numb from the ice.
After Feng Yue finished eating, Wei Xiaofeng happily pulled him up and walked to his storage room.
The Wangfu’s storage room was separate from Wei Xiaofeng’s storage room. Wei Xiaofeng’s storage room only stored his things.
The gold and silver jewelry that Feng Yue gave him, as well as the dowry he brought, and many small trinkets he usually bought, were all piled up in his storage room.
His storage room was truly dazzling, with more than a dozen shelves all filled.
There were as many as a hundred boxes on the ground.
Wei Xiaofeng asked people to empty a box and put many small trinkets into the empty box.
“What are all these?”
Wei Xiaofeng told him about them as if reciting a list of treasures: “This is a sandalwood fan. I bought three. I gave one to A Cai, and this one is for Alan. This is a kongzhu, which is so fun to play with! This ivory comb is especially comfortable for combing hair. This is a linglong lock, this is an ivory ball, also called a ghost craft ball. When I first got it, I could look at it all day!”
He didn’t know how long he talked, his mouth was dry, and the box was full. “Let’s send this much this time. Can I send more next time?”
Feng Yue couldn’t help but laugh. “Yes, Alan should be very happy to receive these. What do you want to tell him? I’ll write it in the letter as well.”
Wei Xiaofeng thought for a long time, and finally just said, “There’s nothing to say. Let him eat well, drink well, sleep well, and be happy. When I have time in the future, I’ll go play with him.”
Feng Yue lightly lifted his chin and kissed him. Wei Xiaofeng was stunned. “Why did you suddenly kiss me?”
“I kissed my fu lang, not someone else.”
Who told him that he was extremely cute just now? He could sweeten people’s hearts.
The next morning, Wei Xiaofeng and Sang Cai went to the teahouse by carriage to have fun.
Feng Yue took Mu Yunhua to the manor more than twenty miles outside the city.
The manor had poor harvests over the years, and the land was surrounded by high mountains and rocks. So, Feng Yue transferred the servants from the manor to other places, cleaned it up, and turned it into a training ground.
It was both hidden and good for deploying troops.
It was a capital crime for a vassal king to hide troops, but this place was very far from the capital. Guangling was now under his control, and as long as it wasn’t with his permission, no news could be sent out from here.
“How many people have you recruited recently?”
“Three thousand militiamen have been recruited, and three hundred warhorses have been bought from the people. Our own horse farm has bred more than two hundred horses. Do you want to expand and raise more horses? Pigs and sheep can also be raised!”
“Did you come to Guangling to open a farm?”
“If we raise pigs, we can slaughter them during the New Year’s Festival and distribute them to the soldiers to take back to make dumplings. Isn’t that great?”
Seeing that Mu Yunhua might really want to raise pigs, Feng Yue didn’t say anything more, and only said, “You can raise them.”