PPS Chapter 51

Chapter 51: Separate Beds

“Why are we sleeping in separate beds?” Chu Zhaoyi, wearing pajamas and clutching a blanket, sat domineeringly in the center of the bed, pouting when he heard Gu Yusen’s words.

“Because we’re both getting older. There’s no reason for us to keep sleeping together.”

“Men and women shouldn’t touch hands when giving or receiving things, and neither should men and men.”

“Understand, my delicate Chu?”

Gu Yusen stood by the bed with an air of righteousness, also holding a blanket in his hands.

He looked like he might bolt out the door any second.

“But there’s only one bedroom here,” Chu Zhaoyi blinked.

This was just a two-bedroom apartment; the other room had been converted into a painting studio. There simply wasn’t a second bedroom for him to sleep in.

“It’s okay, there’s a bed in the painting studio. I’ll sleep there for now,” Gu Yusen had already made up his mind.

Anywhere was fine.

“Sleeping there isn’t comfortable, Brother Sanmu, don’t make a fuss. I’m sleepy,” Chu Zhaoyi yawned. Ever since he came to the Gu family, they had always slept together. He didn’t understand why they suddenly had to separate.

“It’s comfortable.”

Whether it was comfortable or not was a secondary concern; maintaining a safe distance from Chu Zhaoyi was the most important thing.

Gu Yusen was determined; nothing could change his mind.

“Don’t you want me anymore? Brother Sanmu?” Chu Zhaoyi tilted his head, accusing him unhappily.

He knew Gu Yusen’s personality. Although he didn’t know why, every time he said something like this, Gu Yusen would always compromise, nodding to whatever he said.

It always worked.

Until today, when it didn’t.

“It’s not that I don’t want you, but you’re already nineteen, an adult. How can you keep clinging to your brother to sleep with?” Gu Yusen deliberately emphasized the word “brother,” closely observing Chu Zhaoyi’s expression after hearing it.

If Chu Zhaoyi really had some presumptuous thoughts about him, he would definitely be sensitive to the word “brother” and would reject it.

Chu Zhaoyi frowned as expected, but not in the way Gu Yusen expected. Instead, he realized that he didn’t seem to have any reason to refute Gu Yusen’s statement.

“Brother Sanmu…” Chu Zhaoyi touched the blanket on his body.

Why?

Why were they separating the beds?

Why did they suddenly have to sleep apart?

Everything was fine before. Why did Brother Sanmu have this idea?

“Is Brother Sanmu angry with me?” This was the only possibility he could think of.

“No, I just think we’re grown up and shouldn’t always sleep together. It’ll be a bad influence if word gets out.”

“It won’t get out. I won’t tell anyone.”

“That’s not the point. The point is the first part of the sentence.”

“But we only met two months ago. We didn’t suddenly grow up in two months,” Chu Zhaoyi said more than usual. As they went back and forth, the atmosphere suddenly became a little strange.

Gu Yusen froze, also realizing that he was being unreasonable. Didn’t this mean that they were the same age when they first met, so why was it okay then but not now?

“Brother Sanmu, that’s not your reason,” Chu Zhaoyi looked at Gu Yusen’s face, noticing his slightly stiff expression, although he quickly recovered. Still, he noticed it.

That wasn’t the reason for separating.

Something must have happened today that made Gu Yusen suddenly realize that there was a problem with them sleeping in the same bed.

Yes, Chu Zhaoyi had always known that it wasn’t normal for two grown men to sleep together every night.

But so what?

He had used many methods, acting pitiful and well-behaved, to get what he wanted.

Why couldn’t he?

Gu Yusen suddenly felt a little tired. Chu Zhaoyi’s thinking was different from ordinary people, which wasn’t new, but this was the first time he felt it so clearly.

But he found that he couldn’t refute it.

“It is a reason, A-Yi. You’ve grown up, and I’ve grown up. This is inherently unreasonable. When you first came, I was worried you wouldn’t adapt, so I agreed to let you sleep in my bedroom, but it’s been two months now. A-Yi needs to learn to grow up on your own, to be independent.”

“I don’t want to! I have Brother Sanmu, why do I need to grow up? Why do I need to be independent?” Chu Zhaoyi’s reaction was bigger than expected. His dark eyes looked even emptier under the light. These two sentences affected him even more than separating the beds.

“I can’t be with you all the time,” Gu Yusen felt that he had been led into a dead end by Chu Zhaoyi. He even wondered if it was right or wrong to have agreed to let Chu Zhaoyi into his bedroom to appease him, and even to have indulged this person so much afterwards.

The most terrible thing in the world is the degree to which one person depends on another, reaching an untouchable level.

“Yes, you have to be with me all the time!”

Gu Yusen felt a strange emotion in his heart. Although he didn’t want to admit it, this emotion was similar to secret delight…

“Cough cough,” Gu Yusen brushed aside this strange emotion, cleared his throat twice, and met the young man’s red-rimmed eyes, softened completely.

“I will always be with you, but we need to maintain a distance,” Gu Yusen insisted.

He understood that if he didn’t have special feelings for Chu Zhaoyi, it would be irresponsible to indulge Chu Zhaoyi’s closeness.

He thought he didn’t have special feelings. He was a Yan Kong who liked beautiful people, and Chu Zhaoyi’s face was perfectly aligned with his aesthetic preferences.

But he always understood one thing: feelings based on appearance can only come from desire.

Not a true longing of the heart.

“But you’re worried about me sleeping alone,” Chu Zhaoyi had noticed before that Gu Yusen hadn’t let him sleep alone since his last episode, even during naps.

As if he was afraid that he wouldn’t see him when he woke up.

Gu Yusen cursed inwardly, damn it, he forgot about that. He didn’t expect Chu Zhaoyi to notice it too.

After that episode, he asked Mason, who said that when a person sleeps for a long time and wakes up to find the sky outside is gray, it is easy to generate feelings of loneliness and isolation.

These emotions are normal for ordinary people.

But for Chu Zhaoyi, it was different. Any negative emotion could lead to Chu Zhaoyi’s relapse.

From then on, Gu Yusen never dared to let Chu Zhaoyi sleep alone again, or he would always time it so that he entered at the time Chu Zhaoyi would wake up.

Ensuring the young man would see him when he woke up.

He was really confused, his mind was full of keeping his distance and forgot all about it.

“Then I’ll make a makeshift bed on the floor,” Gu Yusen thought for a second and came up with a win-win solution. After tonight, he would just get another bed and put it in.

Anyway, this bedroom was big enough to fit two beds.

Chu Zhaoyi saw that Gu Yusen was determined and wouldn’t budge. He didn’t show much expression on his face, just moved his gaze away from Gu Yusen, pulled off his hearing aid from his ear and threw it on the bedside table, grabbed the blanket, lay down and turned his back to Gu Yusen.

Clearly, he was angry and didn’t want to communicate.

“Hey, be careful when you take off your hearing aid, don’t hurt yourself.”

Gu Yusen could see it all too well, sighed. Wasn’t this for Chu Zhaoyi’s own good? When he couldn’t win the argument, he would get angry, and when he was angry, he would pull out his hearing aid and refuse to communicate.

What a bad temper he had indulged.

Chu Zhaoyi huddled in the blanket, listening to the rustling sounds of Gu Yusen making a makeshift bed behind him. Gu Yusen was efficient and quickly finished.

With a “click,” Gu Yusen turned off the light, and the whole room plunged into darkness.

Chu Zhaoyi stared at the floor in the darkness, not closing his eyes for a long time.