MNL Chapter 117

Chapter 117: As Wished “I am forever willing.”

Chapter 117 As Wished “I am forever willing.”

“Whoosh–”

The fierce glacial wind tousled his hair. The young man at the foot of the mountain narrowed his eyes and looked up at the distant white peak.

“Hello, my name is Jiang Ping. I am the leader responsible for this ascent of Mount Yamb. Don’t worry, stick close to me, and I guarantee you will all return safely.”

The loud and strong voice of a man came from not far away, and a group of people followed closely.

The man zipped his windbreaker to the top and put on his mountaineering bag.

To avoid communicating with his companions, the man stayed at the back of the group. The initial stage went smoothly. Four hours later, the man looked at the altimeter. There was still a vertical distance of 1,600 meters from the summit, but he was already experiencing mild altitude sickness, which forced him to slow down.

Half an hour later, the man sat down to rest at an altitude of 4,100 meters, putting some distance between himself and the mountaineering team led by Jiang Ping.

After taking two doses of glucose, the altitude sickness eased a lot. The man got up and was about to continue when he heard a crisp cracking sound. It came from somewhere, like something breaking.

The man’s nerves suddenly tensed, but he found the sound getting louder and louder, eventually turning into a low roar coming from the mountain peak.

–An avalanche!

The man immediately threw away the heavy objects and ran uphill. However, it was too late. He saw a cloud of snow mist rising in the distance, and a white torrent suddenly struck, with a suffocating speed.

The man clung tightly to the nearest rock, but the speed of the snow flow was too fast. In the blink of an eye, the white giant wave had rushed in front of him, pressing down like a high wall. The ice and gravel mixed in it scraped past his ears, making a harsh impact sound, and snow powder poured into his mouth and nose, making breathing extremely difficult.

Countless snow blocks hit his head. The man couldn’t hold on and was about to let go, but at the critical moment, a steady and powerful hand suddenly reached through the wind and snow and grabbed his wrist.

The man looked up and vaguely recognized a figure in a black mountaineering suit in the snowstorm. In the cold of minus twenty degrees Celsius, the temperature from the other person’s palm was particularly clear.

Countless snow waves mixed with hard objects roared past. The man could feel the hand trembling constantly, but the grip did not diminish at all.

However, the airflow became stronger and stronger, and it was ultimately beyond human power to resist. Two tightly clasped hands were forced to let go. The man was thrown into the air by the wind and waves, then crashed into the rock wall, constantly tumbling, falling, and finally swallowed by the endless white.

After a fifteen-minute avalanche, the entire snow mountain fell into a deathly silence again.

The man woke up from a cold and dark world. The dense and thick snow completely pressed down on his body. His chest, abdomen, and limbs were numb. Endless cold penetrated into his bone marrow. Severe hypoxia meant he couldn’t last long.

Before dying, the man thought of many things, happy, fearful, painful, and confused, but they all eventually became regrets.

As his consciousness was about to dissipate, the man heard a faint sound, like someone calling, or like the sound of the wind. So he concentrated his last strength to try to call for help, but his throat seemed to be sealed by ice and snow, and he could only make a few soft moans like a mosquito.

His heartbeat became heavier and heavier, and his breath became weaker and weaker. The man stopped struggling and calmly accepted this reality.

However, he didn’t know how long it had passed when suddenly a faint ray of light penetrated the snow layer, forcibly breaking the darkness in front of him. The man felt like he had come to another world. A tall figure appeared in his blurry vision, standing tall like a king.

The man desperately wanted to see who that person was, but the light and shadow in front of him and the sound in his ears began to become blurred and distant. He felt his body sinking continuously. Coldness, pain, fatigue, numbness…all feelings were disappearing, and finally the world in front of him collapsed into fragments, and everything in the world evaporated.

The weight of the body gradually recovered, and the senses were returning little by little.

…

Two o’clock in the morning.

The person on the hospital bed opened his eyes.

The mechanical ticking sound of the instruments beside him pulled Xu Jing back to reality from the chaos.

He thought he really had a long dream, so long that it felt like he had really died once.

His throat was as dry as if it had been rubbed with sandpaper. Xu Jing opened his mouth but made no sound. He turned his head slightly and saw Shen Yan leaning aside with his eyes closed, and he instantly felt a lot of peace.

He wanted to get up to go to the bathroom, but as soon as he turned over, a burst of deadly pain came from his chest. Xu Jing couldn’t help but gasp. Shen Yan opened his eyes almost at the same time.

Their eyes met, and Xu Jing didn’t struggle anymore. He said hoarsely, “I want to go to the bathroom.”

“I’ll carry you.”

Shen Yan was about to reach out, but Xu Jing stopped him.

“…It’s inconvenient.”

His sense of shame hadn’t dropped to the point where he could let Shen Yan urinate for him. Shen Yan glanced at the half-bottle of saline solution and didn’t insist. He helped Xu Jing into the bathroom, who was panting every three steps and pausing every five steps.

After using the toilet, Xu Jing paid attention to the mirror and was almost startled by the person inside with frizzy hair, pale lips, bluish eye sockets, and even stubble that was a bit glaring.

Was this him? Was this really him?

They had both been in the hospital for a few days, but how could Shen Yan still be so handsome, while he looked like a senior second-dimensional otaku who had been guiding continuously at home for half a month, revealing a sense of kidney deficiency throughout his body.

Seeing that Xu Jing’s expression was a little wrong after he came out, Shen Yan quickly asked, “What’s wrong?”

Xu Jing lay weakly back on the hospital bed and said weakly, “How many days have I been in a coma?”

“Three days.”

How could he become like this in just three days? Xu Jing couldn’t help but sigh.

Until the doctor came in to check and said that he was fine and could be discharged after a good rest, Shen Yan’s heart, which had been hanging for a few days, finally fell. He sat down on the edge of the hospital bed and apologized.

Xu Jing was stunned before he remembered that there was something more important that he hadn’t figured out. He immediately put aside the unspeakable thoughts he had just had and said sternly, “I don’t accept it.”

Shen Yan’s eyes drooped down and said, “I know, but I still want to say it to you.” He also held Xu Jing’s hand and gently pressed his cheek against it, and whispered, “I would rather the injured one was me.”

He originally wanted to take the opportunity to coerce Shen Yan to explain everything that had happened before, but after many years, he was still the same spineless person who was helpless when he saw the other party like this.

“What I mean is, I don’t accept your apology unless you are willing to tell me everything that happened before, then I will forgive you.”

After a long silence, Shen Yan asked, “Do you really want to know?”

Xu Jing said seriously, “I don’t want to miss anything.”

Shen Yan paused and nodded, “Okay.”

He originally thought that when he mentioned those things again, he would still hate that person so much that he would grit his teeth, but in reality, he was as calm as if he was telling someone else’s story.

Perhaps all the resentment had vanished the moment he personally pulled out that oxygen tube.

And how he was controlled and used after waking up from his vegetative state, how he was locked in the basement by Shen Linzhi for half a month without seeing the sun, and how he threatened to die to dispel Shen Linzhi’s idea of taking him to do brainwashing surgery, how he saw Gu Ruozhao smash Zhong Yiqiu’s last keepsake in front of him, but could only swallow his anger.

There were too many things like this, so many that they constituted his entire life during that time, and it was too painful, so painful that Xu Jing’s heart was also torn open with a bloody wound, and every word he heard deepened that wound like a knife.

No wonder he suffered from such a serious mental illness, no wonder he became the way he is now. He couldn’t imagine what kind of life Shen Yan had lived during that time. What was ridiculous was that he actually thought that Shen Yan had willingly stayed in the United States.

“So the double-layered milk custard on that plane…”

Shen Yan hummed and said, “It was me.”

So his premonition at the time was true, but his heart was not firm enough. If he could have been more firm at that time, and looked more carefully, Xu Jing thought, perhaps they wouldn’t have missed each other for so many years.

“As for the people who kidnapped you, it’s just because I didn’t give his company a helping hand.” Shen Yan smiled self-deprecatingly and said, “If I had known it would hurt you, I might as well have helped him in the first place. It’s just a matter of a few hundred million.”

“…” Xu Jing sighed and said, “I thought you robbed his wife in the United States, and that’s why he hated you so much.”

The corner of Shen Yan’s mouth twitched.

His psychology was not so perverted.

“Then what happened in the end?”

“He was left with a breath and handed over to the police.”

But in fact, the actual situation was much more tragic than this. Afterwards, Shen Yan himself thought about it and felt that he might have really been crazy at that time.

Xu Jing hummed and patted the empty space on the hospital bed and said, “Want to come up?”

Although the bed was not small, it was still a bit difficult for two big men to sleep together. After Shen Yan went up, he was afraid of pressing Xu Jing, so almost half of his body was outside.

After Xu Jing saw it, he gave a tsk and said, “Some people at home can’t wait to have zero-distance contact with me every minute and every second. Now we’re sleeping in the same bed and still so far apart, why, do you dislike me?”

“How could I.” Shen Yan was a little amused when he heard it, and asked, “Then can we have zero-distance contact for a while now?”

“…Your taste is quite strong.”

If they were to make headlines in this way, I am afraid that the ancestors on both sides would be so angry that they would come back to life.

While speaking, Shen Yan had already turned his body, and the coldness in his eyes disappeared in an instant like ice melting, reflecting a bit of soft light, appearing focused and affectionate. No matter who was stared at so intently, they would feel a little uncomfortable in their heart, not to mention such a pair of deep and beautiful eyes.

Xu Jing coughed lightly and said with a bit of restraint, “Don’t look at me like that.”

Shen Yan leaned forward and kissed Xu Jing’s cheek and said, “You’re so good-looking, why can’t people look at you?”

“…”

He looked like a slobby homeless man now, where was he good-looking.

Xu Jing thought he could finally understand what it felt like to have a lover’s eyes filter out the flaws. The way he looked now, he would be swept out the door by Qin Xin when he got home.

“By the way, didn’t tell my mom, right?”

Shen Yan was silent for a moment and said honestly, “I don’t dare.”

“What?” Xu Jing smiled when he heard it, “Is there really something in this world that you don’t dare to do?”

“Just after you and I were together, something like this happened. I’m afraid that if they know, they will think that I can’t take care of you and won’t be willing to hand you over to me.” Shen Yan paused and his tone became deep, “But I promise that this kind of thing will never happen again.”

Xu Jing raised his eyebrows, “The way you said that is like you want me to marry you.”

Shen Yan smiled and asked, “Is it possible?”

Xu Jing’s hand that didn’t have an IV quietly stretched out towards Shen Yan’s back and accurately touched the scar and said, “There is a sentence in the marriage vows that partners should always be faithful to each other, do you know what faithfulness is?”

Shen Yan’s body stiffened.

“From the moment I woke up, I wanted to ask, the person who saved me on Mount Yamb, was it you?”

It was clearly a question, but he heard a tone of certainty. Obviously, this was no longer a question, but a confirmation.

Shen Yan knew that he could no longer hide it and replied, “Yes.”

Xu Jing’s eyes tightened, “So this scar was also left to save me?”

“Yeah.” Shen Yan said calmly, “I just hit a rock crevice and got a few stitches, it’s nothing.”

Xu Jing touched the scar extremely carefully, and all kinds of emotions swept over his heart and said softly, “It must have hurt a lot.”

Shen Yan held Xu Jing’s hand and said, “It doesn’t hurt.”

It was still shocking even after so long. How did Shen Yan manage to get him out of the snow mountain at that time.

Xu Jing couldn’t think any further and raised his somewhat sore eyes and asked, “Is there anything else?”

Perhaps he was influenced by that marriage vow, or perhaps he felt that one lie always needed countless lies to fill it. Over time, he would definitely be exposed. Shen Yan didn’t hesitate this time. He took the phone on the table, opened a private document, and Xu Jing saw that the password entered on it was his birthday.

He said, “Everything is in here.”

Xu Jing took it over and saw the content presented on it. In an instant, his brain stopped working like a clock with a broken spring.

[February 5th Barcelona]

He looks like he’s in a good mood today

It would be better if he could wear more

[February 18th Paris]

Happy Birthday.

[February 25th London]

It’s raining

I miss him so much.

[March 6th Norway]

He’s watching the aurora

I’m watching him.

[March 27th Cairo]

Ran so far just to see the mummy?

Separated for too long

Can’t guess what he’s thinking

[April 6th Sahara Desert]

Um, came to the desert.

He looks cute riding a camel

…

[December 4th Bangkok]

This hat is nice today

Want to touch his head

[December 15th Bali]

There are so many people hitting on him

Luckily they were all rejected by him

[December 28th Borneo]

I wish I could be by his side.

It was clear that each piece of content was only a short sentence or two, but Xu Jing watched it for nearly half an hour. Even after reading it, he was too shocked to react to what was expressed behind these recorded things.

Then Shen Yan opened something else.

That was an album.

At sunset, he looked up at the Tree of Life of the Sagrada Familia in Barcelona. At two o’clock in the morning, he sat on the snow in Senja Island waiting for the aurora to appear. On a rainy evening, he walked with an umbrella along the Seine River and squatted on the street teasing a stray cat, and there was also his group photo with the mummy in the Egyptian Museum, preparing to ride a camel in the Sahara Desert but was sprayed in the face with a mouthful of saliva… A total of 36 cities, 1036 photos.

When he turned to the end, Xu Jing couldn’t make any sound.

During that year, he wandered aimlessly between various cities, going forward on his own, competing with himself, but he never thought that every place he went, every inch of land he stepped on, there was someone behind him re-walking in his footsteps.

So from beginning to end, he was the one who gave up first, he was the one who chose to forget without leaving any room, and Shen Yan, counting the previous time, waited for him for seven years in total, a full seven years, without ever changing his mind.

The huge ward was strangely quiet. It was always a bit embarrassing to show the recorded content to the protagonist of the record so frankly. Shen Yan planned to say something to ease the awkward atmosphere.

“Um, does it look good?”

No one responded.

Shen Yan turned his head, but saw the person next to him trembling slightly, and the corners of his eyes were already red. Then a drop of hot tears fell, drawing a small water mark on the back of his hand.

“…”

Shen Yan was a little at a loss, held Xu Jing’s shoulder and asked, “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t know…I don’t know you did so much for me, I don’t know you’ve been waiting for me all these years, I don’t know any of this, I thought you…” Xu Jing couldn’t go on.

“It’s okay, it’s all in the past.”

However, it was this light tone that seemed to hit Xu Jing’s tear glands. His tears began to fall uncontrollably. Shen Yan had never seen Xu Jing cry like this, as if he had suffered a great grievance, crying so much that he couldn’t say a complete sentence.

Until half a pack of tissues was used up, Shen Yan sighed softly. He thought helplessly that he had lost to this person in this life.

Shen Yan wiped Xu Jing’s tears and said patiently, “What if the wound breaks open later? Do you think I don’t feel bad enough?”

After the crying stopped, his voice was even hoarser. Xu Jing asked with red eyes, “Why didn’t you tell me earlier.”

Shen Yan thought about it. He did owe Xu Jing an explanation. Although some words seemed pretentious once they were said, there were always a few unavoidable pretentiousnesses in a person’s life.

“I don’t want these to become your burden. I want you to know that it’s my business to love you. Whether you accept it or not, you are always free. In other words, I don’t care about gains or losses, and I don’t care about success or failure, because being good to you has become my instinct, so you never need to feel guilty for what I do.”

But why was this, Xu Jing thought, was he really worth everything Shen Yan did for him?

“Do you still remember the sentence you said to me back then?”

Xu Jing was stunned.

Shen Yan recalled for him word by word, “You said, you wanted to give me a home.”

Xu Jing’s eyes flickered and said, “I remember.”

“Then are you willing now?”

In the moment when their eyes met, it seemed that everything had an answer. They clearly saw the iceberg in each other’s eyes melting for themselves. It was extremely enthusiastic, straightforward, sincere and vast love, just like they were back then.

Tears slid down his cheeks again, but Xu Jing laughed and said, “I do.”

“I am forever willing.”

Shen Yan also laughed, bowed his head and kissed away Xu Jing’s tears.

He thought that was enough.

As long as he had this sentence, it would be enough to exchange for his years of waiting, willingly.

In the many years that followed, Xu Jing couldn’t figure out why he suddenly burst into tears at that moment, but even if he was so embarrassed at the time, he never felt ashamed, because if he did it again, he would still do it.

And Shen Yan often made many jokes, but he never mentioned this matter once.

If he had to use something to explain it, Xu Jing thought, perhaps it was in these long and deep years, people’s hearts were prone to change, but they loved each other, always more than they loved themselves.