SM Chapter 39

Chapter 39: I Don’t Want Anything Anymore (Two Chapters Combined)

Chapter 39: I Don’t Want Anything Anymore (Two Chapters Combined)

(Part 1)

Answering Ye Lai’s previous prayers, the snow this winter came earlier than usual, with the first snow falling at the end of October.

The world was covered overnight with a layer of white, concealing all the filth inside. But the next morning, as soon as the sun came out, that white shell became one with the filth inside.

Cars sped past, the black slush thrown up by their tires glistening in the sunlight.

Ye Lai gripped the steering wheel, rushing around to various film crews to drop off his resume every day. He begged everyone he could, hoping his friends could introduce him to more work.

Zhang Yihao was handling things at the company, and aside from the interview program with Ning Yuan that he had initially agreed to, Ning Yuan introduced Ye Lai to a few other commercial opportunities. Zuo Qi also recommended him to a few film crews.

Ye Lai wasn’t picky about work now; anything would do.

Auditions for movies and TV series came one after another. Although only a few film crews offered him a contract, it was still much better than Ye Lai had expected, and it wasn’t like he couldn’t get any work at all.

The 12 million that the producers of “The World on the Bough” were insisting on hadn’t been reduced by a single cent. Now, he could only go through legal procedures, but the several million in breach of contract fees that Li Xun had estimated were not easy to gather all at once. Ye Lai had to prepare in advance.

He listed his apartment on real estate websites. The location and surrounding facilities of the apartment were excellent. Over the years, the price had increased significantly. The apartment sold within a few days of being listed. He also urged the payment of outstanding commercial and advertising fees, managing to scrape together a small portion of the required amount.

He didn’t tell anyone about selling the apartment and temporarily moved back to the orphanage. However, it was too far from the city center, and he had to wake up more than an hour earlier every day.

In less than two weeks, he had lost weight again. The director of the orphanage lovingly touched Ye Lai’s face, saying, “Have you been working too hard lately? I see you leave before dawn every day and come back in the middle of the night.”

“I’ve been too busy lately, running around to film crews and attending commercials and events.”

“Even when you’re busy, you need to take care of your health. I’ll tell the kitchen to make a few extra dishes tonight. Come back early to eat.”

“Okay,” Ye Lai replied with a smile.

Ye Lai took the director to see the doctor Chen Yu Chuan had introduced to them again, but the results were still the same: she could only continue chemotherapy.

Because of the chemotherapy, the director’s hair was falling out severely. Ye Lai took out a hat he had just bought and put it on her head. “It’s cold, you should wear a hat.”

“It’s beautiful,” the director said, picking up her reading glasses and looking at herself in the mirror for a long time.

“You must take your medicine on time,” Ye Lai reminded her every day.

“I know,” the director said, changing the subject, “By the way, what about the matter I discussed with you before?”

“What matter?” Ye Lai asked, confused.

“The business card I gave you before, my friend’s son. What do you think about him?”

So that’s what she meant. In the past, when the director urged him, Ye Lai would just agree superficially and brush it off. Now that the director was sick, she was even more worried about them.

Ye Lai understood that every elder was like this. To put her mind at ease, he agreed, “Okay, I’ll go meet him later. I accidentally lost the business card last time.”

The director took out a new business card from the drawer and stuffed it into Ye Lai’s hand. “Take good care of it this time. I’ve met that child before, and he’s really quite good…”

Ye Lai numbly took the business card, unsure whether he felt helpless or something else; he mostly felt numb.

He spoke a few more words with the director, and Xiao Yu and several other children came in and pulled him away. These children were happiest when Ye Lai came back to live with them, as they could see Brother Lai every day.

–

–

A week later, there was another heavy snowfall, and this time, the temperature dropped completely. Even when the sun came out, the snow didn’t melt. Snowplows worked hard on the roads.

Weibo pushed another message about Sheng Mingqian to him: he and Qin Zimo had been photographed eating out together.

#Sheng Mingqian Qin Zimo Sweet Outing#

The two of them entered the restaurant together, Sheng Mingqian reaching out to hold the door open, with Qin Zimo following closely behind. Unsurprisingly, the comment section was filled with Zhou Ran’s fans crying.

Old flames having a dinner date, what’s there to cry about in the comments? Ye Lai thought, pressing the power button on his phone to stop looking.

But out of sight, out of mind wasn’t as easy as he thought. Ye Lai always managed to hear about Sheng Mingqian through various channels.

The fact that Sheng Mingqian and Qin Zimo had dated was dug up, and a video of a private gathering was attached below.

Clearly, whoever had the video was either someone who had attended the gathering at the time, or the person themselves. There was no need to guess who had leaked the video content, but Ye Lai had no interest in guessing.

The video was of a private party. Sheng Mingqian was obviously drunk, swaying and holding onto a chair, standing next to Qin Zimo, tilting his head and saying something to him. In the end, as he spoke, he laughed…

Ye Lai sat cross-legged on the floor, his back against the side of the bed, repeatedly rewinding and watching the few seconds in the middle of the video where Sheng Mingqian smiled at Qin Zimo for a long, long time. Eventually, the sun set, and after the light disappeared, the room slowly became dim.

The floor was a little cold, and the old air conditioner hummed loudly overhead, filling his ears with noise. The only light in the room was the faint glow from his phone screen, reflecting on his pale face.

That was a side of Sheng Mingqian that Ye Lai had never seen before. So, this was how Sheng Mingqian was when he loved someone. So, he could smile, and when he smiled, his eyes sparkled.

Sheng Mingqian had never smiled at him like that. Ye Lai felt a wave of sadness; withering was instantaneous, spreading throughout his body in an instant.

A few days later, the entertainment reporters photographed Sheng Mingqian taking Qin Zimo back to the villa. The photo was of the two of them entering the door together from behind.

Ye Lai frowned. It was almost time; there were less than two weeks left on the agreement. Why were they in such a hurry?

He also thought that, strictly speaking, he was still occupying a position he shouldn’t be occupying…

On the night the agreement was due to expire, Ye Lai found the suit he had just had made a few days earlier. It was the outfit he had prepared to wear to the New Year’s event. Standing in front of the floor-to-ceiling mirror, he straightened his collar and cuffs.

His relationship with Sheng Mingqian had started off so badly and so ugly. Now, it seemed like he could only put more effort into his appearance, to earn himself a bit more dignity. Thinking of this, Ye Lai’s fingers trembled as he buttoned his jacket.

What was this supposed to be?

After spinning around in front of the mirror, Ye Lai confirmed that there wasn’t a single extra wrinkle on his clothes. Then, he picked up the car keys and the tote bag on the table and went out.

Xiao Yu was standing by the slide. When he saw Ye Lai leave, he ran over and hugged his leg, asking him where he was going.

Ye Lai patted Xiao Yu’s head. “Brother Lai has something very important to take care of right now.”

“What important thing? Brother Lai, are you going to see that long-legged uncle from last time?”

Ye Lai was stunned by what he said. “Xiao Yu, how did you know?”

Xiao Yu’s two dark eyes darted around. “I… I guessed.”

It was obviously a lie, but Ye Lai didn’t have the extra energy to ask right now. He took Xiao Yu’s hand and led him back into the room. “Xiao Yu, be good and sleep well with your brothers.”

“Brother Lai, will you be back tonight?”

“I’ll be back.”

–

–

As soon as Ye Lai drove up to the entrance, the electronic gate automatically opened. Ye Lai turned the steering wheel and drove into the yard, parking in the garage.

He had sent Sheng Mingqian a message just before he left, but Sheng Mingqian hadn’t replied. However, Sheng Mingqian’s car was parked in the garage, and the light in the study on the second floor was on.

Ye Lai stood in the yard, looking up. The curtains of the study window moved, and a gray figure turned away from the window.

Sheng Mingqian was home.

Ye Lai lowered his eyes and slowly took a few breaths. He had never really liked this place. He still remembered the first time Sheng Mingqian had arranged for him to stay here.

Sheng Mingqian walked quickly forward, and he trotted to catch up, always falling half a step behind.

“From now on, you’ll live here,” Sheng Mingqian casually tossed him a set of keys. “Of course, you can leave at any time. This place is far from the city center, and the security measures are excellent. Outsiders can’t get in.”

He had understood at that time that Sheng Mingqian would bring him here because he valued the house’s secrecy. Only in this way could their relationship be better hidden, unknown to outsiders.

“The guest room is on the second floor,” Sheng Mingqian led him upstairs again, pushing open the door of the guest room next to the master bedroom. It looked like it had just been cleaned, and everything was new. New things always had a smell.

The last thing Sheng Mingqian said that day was, “I rarely come back. Don’t wait.”

Once the floodgates of memory were opened, the monsters inside rushed out all at once, leaving Ye Lai unable to stop them.

For the first two years after their marriage, Ye Lai spent a lot of time living here. Although Sheng Mingqian said he rarely came back, he couldn’t help but want to wait for him.

He thought that maybe one day Sheng Mingqian would come back, and wouldn’t he be able to see him then?

Moreover, he and Sheng Mingqian were already married. Marriage meant there was a bond tying them together, one end pulling him and the other pulling Sheng Mingqian.

Then one day, Sheng Mingqian came back drunk. When he saw him at the door, he was stunned for a long time, his eyes blurred from the alcohol.

Ye Lai understood his eyes as soon as he saw them. Sheng Mingqian hadn’t expected anyone to be home. Perhaps he had long forgotten about him, his hidden marriage partner. In the end, he didn’t say anything, walking past him to sit on the sofa.

His throat parched from the alcohol, Sheng Mingqian stuck out his tongue and licked his lips.

Ye Lai turned around and went to the kitchen to pour a glass of water. The water was freshly boiled and still a bit hot. He held the glass and kept blowing on it. Finally, he took a sip himself to test it. When he felt that the water temperature was just right, he handed it to Sheng Mingqian, who was sitting blankly on the sofa.

“Mingqian, you drank tonight, didn’t you? Drink more water; your stomach will feel better.”

Sheng Mingqian’s gaze moved from Ye Lai’s face to the transparent glass. There were still water stains on the rim of the glass where Ye Lai had drunk, hanging on the wall of the glass and dripping down.

When Ye Lai saw that he didn’t take it, he remembered that he had drunk from it himself and put down the glass. “I’m sorry, I was too anxious and forgot. I’ll go pour you another glass.”

“There’s no need…” Sheng Mingqian said before he turned around, his voice slurred by the alcohol, and directly picked up the glass that Ye Lai had drunk from, finishing it in one gulp.

That night, Ye Lai took a bath in the guest room. Before knocking on the door to the master bedroom, he relied entirely on the impulsive surge in his body.

Sheng Mingqian opened the door, his fingers lifting his chin. “This time, do you have a camera on you? Do you want to record it again?”

Ye Lai stood at the door, taking off his clothes one by one, standing naked in front of Sheng Mingqian, showing him that he had nothing on him.

“I have nothing…” he said, his voice trembling.

As soon as he finished speaking, a large hand suddenly grabbed his waist, gripping it tightly. With a turn of his body, he brought him into the room.

In the chaos, Ye Lai was hit in the arm against the switch on the wall by Sheng Mingqian, who was lifting him up. The lights went out, and in the darkness, there was only the sound of the two of them slowly entangled together, and the firelight of their body temperatures colliding.

That night was their second night. The physical pain and satisfaction were both clearly engraved in Ye Lai’s bones.

Even now, he still remembered it. Recalling it once made his bones ache…

(Part 2)

The quicksand of memory was about to swallow Ye Lai completely. After submerging his mouth and nose, a feeling of suffocation followed. The feeling of oxygen deficiency was like sprinkling a layer of hallucinogen in his body, making everything in front of him dizzying.

Ye Lai finally managed to lift his sunken legs, only to step into another deep pit.

He thought of the fact that Sheng Mingqian had only recently brought Qin Zimo back and had been photographed.

Ye Lai guessed that there might still be people guarding the area nearby during this time. He put on his hat when he got out of the car, pressing the brim low, trying not to turn around and facing away from the direction of the door as much as possible.

This was safer.

Over the years, he had always thought that only he had been here. But he was too presumptuous. Even if he didn’t like it, he had lived here for so many years. Even a small dog knew how to guard its home. As soon as he thought that Qin Zimo had also been here, Ye Lai smelled the scent of a stranger in his “little nest” as soon as he entered the door.

Although Ye Lai knew that this was just his psychological reaction, he still wrinkled his nose, unwilling to inhale the smell that would make his heart uncomfortable, and a defensive posture vaguely rose in his body.

If he saw that “stranger” at this moment, perhaps he would launch an attack…

But only tonight.

The living room was not lit. The study door on the second floor was open, and the light from the room shone out, illuminating a small section of the hallway and stairs.

Ye Lai took a deep breath and slowly went upstairs, carrying the tote bag. The rhythmic tapping sound of his feet on the steps was like announcing a countdown.

The smoke in the study leaked out of the crack in the door with the light, rolling and swirling in the hallway. As soon as he reached the door, he was choked by it, making his nose tingle.

Sheng Mingqian sat in the armchair next to the desk. The ashtray on the tea table was already full of cigarette butts, and he held a freshly lit cigarette in his fingers. The scarlet firelight flickered, and when he heard the light and heavy footsteps, Sheng Mingqian looked up at the door.

The first feeling was that Ye Lai had lost weight, and his chin was sharper. Ye Lai had a faint smile on his face, his peach blossom eyes trying hard to hide a pool of water, the corners of his eyes slightly upturned, and his red lips were different from the dry and pale appearance that night.

That night, Zhang Yihao had brought the drunk Ye Lai back. How did he leave later?

Sheng Mingqian looked at him and thought for a long time before he remembered that he had watched him leave. When he came back to his senses, there was no one in the living room. Only the place where Ye Lai’s finger had touched between his eyebrows still had a lingering warmth.

Ye Lai only paused on Sheng Mingqian’s face for a second before moving away. Sheng Mingqian had two kraft paper bags next to him, one still sealed and the other already open. There were several thin sheets of paper stacked on top of it. Just by looking at the words on them, you could tell that it was the marriage agreement between him and Sheng Mingqian from five years ago.

“The agreement expires tonight. I’m here to return things…”

Ye Lai took off his hat and walked in, standing in front of the tea table, taking out the items from the tote bag one by one: the keys to the villa, the car keys, and the couple’s items that Yuan Ling had bought for him and Sheng Mingqian.

Watches, belts, crystal buttons, and various small gadgets.

Ye Lai knew that Sheng Mingqian didn’t care about these things, but when he placed the crystal buttons on the table, he still caught a glimpse of Sheng Mingqian’s clothes out of the corner of his eye. There was another one on them.

Ye Lai was stabbed by the blue light of that button, his eyes stinging. He hurriedly looked away, stabilized his slightly trembling fingertips, and put the items away.

Finally, Ye Lai carefully took out the jade safety lock that Yuan Ling had given him from the bag. The box made of purple sandalwood wood felt quite heavy in his palm.

This thing hadn’t been in Ye Lai’s possession for long. He didn’t seem to have warmed it up yet. When he moved out, he could have chosen not to take it at all, but at that time, he was too reluctant and just wanted to possess it for a little longer.

Although he had wanted to possess it forever in his heart, he still had to return it. To end things, he shouldn’t be indecisive.

As Ye Lai arranged the items, Sheng Mingqian felt a heat surge from the soles of his feet, his body swelling and heating up. He irritably took off his suit jacket, revealing several red spots on the inside of his wrist, as if they had been burned by cigarette ashes.

After taking off his clothes, his attention returned to Ye Lai’s thumb. The wound that the band-aid couldn’t cover had long healed, and now it was a shallow, pink scar with white edges.

Sheng Mingqian stood up, standing face to face with Ye Lai. His cold face paired with his dark eyes made him look like a beast that had been hibernating for an entire winter and had just awakened, urgently needing to hunt for food.

Ye Lai sensed the danger, and his rosy lips slowly lost their color, turning pale.

“Five years have passed. What do you want? Money? Resources?” Sheng Mingqian’s index finger, holding the cigarette butt, rubbed forcefully on Ye Lai’s lower lip, stopping only after it had turned red. “Anything is possible…”

Ye Lai’s lips were burning, half from being rubbed by Sheng Mingqian and half from being smoked by the cigarette. He hooked the corners of his lips and stuck out his tongue, licking the spot on Sheng Mingqian’s hand between his thumb and forefinger.

As expected, the beast immediately retracted its hunting hand, and the red light on the cigarette butt flickered.

“Mingqian…” Ye Lai opened his mouth lazily, “I’ve run into a bit of trouble recently. I might have to fight a lawsuit in a while and compensate others millions…”

As soon as he finished speaking, Ye Lai slapped himself hard in his heart. Everything from the past had already been denied by Sheng Mingqian. What was he still expecting now?

But he had been obsessed for so many years; how easy was it to let go all at once? A small grass broke through the soil in his heart and started to grow.

Sheng Mingqian didn’t react to the subtext of his words, agreeing readily, “Okay, I’ll transfer the money to your card. After all, you’ve been with me for so many years; it’s only right to give you some compensation…”

Compensation.

These two words were the second slap, delivered by Sheng Mingqian and also self-inflicted.

Ye Lai only felt a burning pain on both cheeks. His body felt like it was being roasted in a fire, and he could hear the crackling sound of blood and bones burning in his ears.

The grass was too fragile and burned up in an instant.

Ye Lai kept his head lowered and didn’t speak. Sheng Mingqian took another puff of his cigarette and asked him, “Besides this, what else?”

“I’m just kidding with you. I don’t want your money,” Ye Lai raised his head, his face dazed, and squinted his peach blossom eyes. “Director Sheng, I don’t want anything anymore…”

Sheng Mingqian sat back on the sofa, his other hand always in his pocket, feeling the cold thing inside. When he took it out again, his palm was still empty. He bent his index finger and tapped it on the table. “Have you thought about it clearly?”

“Clearly.”

“What about the video?” Sheng Mingqian stopped tapping the table with his finger and crossed his left leg over his right. Although he was looking up at Ye Lai, his voice was condescending.

“What video?” Ye Lai didn’t react at first.

“Are you playing dumb?” Sheng Mingqian put out the cigarette butt in the ashtray. “Of course, it’s the video from the hotel room on the night of the wrap party.”

“So you still remember this,” Ye Lai smiled sarcastically, “I thought you had already forgotten.”

Sheng Mingqian raised his eyebrows, staring intently at Ye Lai. “What, what do you want to do with that video?”

Ye Lai put his hand into his pocket and took out the memory card from that night’s video, twirling it between his fingers.

After entering the door, the defense system that had risen in his body against the smell of strangers automatically transformed into a sharp attack against Sheng Mingqian.

“I thought you had forgotten about this. Before, I was still thinking that if you forgot, I would keep it myself. This video can be regarded as a unique souvenir for me. I’ll take it out from time to time to admire it, to look at Director Sheng’s body, to listen to Director Sheng’s panting. Tsk, it seems that it’s not going to work now. People must have a contract spirit…”

Ye Lai held the memory card, waving it in front of Sheng Mingqian. “Director Sheng, are you sure you want this memory card?”

Sheng Mingqian’s face darkened. Using the same tone that Ye Lai had just used to confirm the termination of the agreement, he said mercilessly, “I want it…”

Ye Lai continued, “The last time I watched the video from that night, it was in the screening room downstairs. I was afraid of disturbing you, so I didn’t turn on the sound. It’s such a waste of such good speakers… If you want to watch it later, remember to turn the sound up a little…”

Sheng Mingqian’s face changed, and he said in a deep voice, “Have you said enough?”

“I’ve said enough, I’ve said enough. Don’t be angry, Director Sheng. I’m just giving you a suggestion.” Ye Lai bent down and put the memory card next to the purple sandalwood box, without hesitating at all.

Sheng Mingqian pinched the memory card, wanting to crush it with force, but in the end, he held back and changed it to clenching it in his hand. He then pulled out a few pieces of paper that were pressed under the marriage agreement. “This is the divorce agreement. Take a look at it. If there are no problems, sign it.”

Ye Lai didn’t look at it carefully. The agreement that Sheng Mingqian had drawn up wouldn’t have any problems. He turned to the signature column on the last page.

There was only paper but no pen. Ye Lai walked to the desk, randomly took a pen from the pen holder, and signed the agreement neatly.

As soon as Ye Lai signed, Sheng Mingqian also picked up a pen and wrote his name next to Ye Lai’s name.

A five-year marriage based on an agreement and ten years of unrequited love ended just like that. Everything was settled at this moment, without any accidents.

When it really came to this moment, it really hurt this much…

Ye Lai’s chest tightened with each pump, and the blood in his body solidified. He held onto the table to barely stand.

Ye Lai looked at Sheng Mingqian, his once bright peach blossom eyes rippling with circles of waves. “The New Year is coming soon. Tomorrow is the last day the Civil Affairs Bureau is open. At eight o’clock tomorrow morning, let’s go handle the divorce procedures.”

“Okay, I’ll be there on time.”

Sheng Mingqian threw the divorce agreement and the already invalid marriage agreement aside, and stuffed the kraft paper bag that hadn’t been opened into the drawer. “Before you leave, think again. What else do you want…”

“Let me think, let me think again…” Ye Lai mechanically repeated Sheng Mingqian’s words.

That’s right, he finally thought of it.

Ye Lai slowly straightened his trembling body, his whole person looking like he had just crawled out of deep water, his lungs filled with water, making it difficult to breathe.

The attack that he had launched against Sheng Mingqian had instantly vanished, and his defense system limply raised its hands in surrender.

Ye Lai looked at Sheng Mingqian, his voice hoarse. “I… I have one more request.”

“What request?” Sheng Mingqian suddenly flicked his eyelids and turned back to ask him.

Ye Lai blinked, still unable to control himself, and two lines of tears slid down his face. “Mingqian, smile, smile at me. We’ve been together for so many years, and I’ve never seen you smile at me properly. I want to see…”