TSIBAMS Chapter 27

Chapter 27

“I’m asking you…” Qi Guang followed Brother Xu, sitting on the sofa.

“You’re overthinking it,” Brother Xu replied before he could finish.

“Huh?” Qi Guang was confused by his response.

“Huh?” Brother Xu was equally bewildered by Qi Guang’s reaction and reached for his phone on the coffee table.

Qi Guang smacked his hand away, “A little less gaming won’t kill you. I’m asking you… does Bai Shu owe you a lot of money?”

“Pfft,” Brother Xu covered his mouth, “Actually, it’s not that much.”

“I knew it.” Qi Guang seemed thoughtful.

“Knew it?”

Humans are indeed repeating machines.

Qi Guang glanced at him, “Go play your game.”

“I’m not playing anymore,” Brother Xu spread his hands, “Now it’s my turn to ask.”

“That fight, it’s over, right?” Qi Guang asked.

“Yeah, it’s over.” Brother Xu’s expression turned slightly serious, “Are you avoiding your dad?”

Qi Guang’s face remained blank, his tone even a bit casual, “My dad’s dead.”

Given the previous rumors, Qi Guang cursing him like that wasn’t strange at all.

Brother Xu nodded, changing his approach, “Are you avoiding the man who parked his car at your school gate?”

“Yeah.” Qi Guang took a deep breath, slowly exhaling.

“I heard some things about your family before,” Brother Xu said.

“What did you hear?” Qi Guang glanced at him.

“Too many rumors, I’m too lazy to tell if they’re true,” Brother Xu leaned back on the sofa, flipping his phone with his right hand, “But I only believe what you say.”

Qi Guang smiled, “Good thing you didn’t ask.”

“You don’t have to say it if you don’t want to,” Brother Xu said.

“You already guessed, right?” Qi Guang stopped looking at him, staring blankly at a spot on the floor.

“I wasn’t too sure, but seeing you like this today, I’d say so,” Brother Xu said.

“It’s okay, go ahead and say it,” Qi Guang still stared at the floor.

“So your dad, he really…”

Killed your mom?

After hesitating for a while, Brother Xu ultimately didn’t say it, patting Qi Guang’s shoulder instead.

“Brother Xu, you’re not an outsider,” Qi Guang looked at Brother Xu, his face devoid of any expression.

He took a cigarette from the pack on the coffee table, lit it with a lighter, took a few puffs, and sighed, “I don’t know where to begin. You know I initially lived with my grandpa. Actually, when I was taken to my parents, I wasn’t very close to them. Over those few years, I only got along better with my mom. As for my dad… his heart was probably never in this family.”

Brother Xu didn’t speak; he had never met his parents growing up, and he never knew the concept of “family.”

Qi Guang continued, “When my mom found out my dad was seeing someone else, she didn’t immediately explode. But I couldn’t stand seeing her put up with it every day. That year, after my middle school entrance exam, I spent months dealing with my dad’s mess, throwing paint at the mistress’s door, smashing cars, and even my dad’s car. In short, for those few months, my dad and I were like enemies every day.”

Brother Xu finally couldn’t resist interjecting with a key point, “You should have let me go. If I didn’t take an arm from that dog and his woman, I’d consider it a loss!”

Qi Guang choked on his smoke, coughing uncontrollably, then looked at Brother Xu with disbelief.

Brother Xu smiled, closed his eyes, and nodded, signaling Qi Guang to continue.

“After my dad and the mistress were harassed endlessly, they came to blame my mom for not raising me well. They had a big fight, finally bringing the affair into the open. That was the worst fight I’d ever seen them have, and the house was a complete mess.” A cigarette was quickly finished, and Qi Guang took another from the pack.

Brother Xu was still regretting Qi Guang’s methods being too soft, complaining incessantly, “I told you! What’s the point of throwing paint? The only result of dealing with shameless people in such a civilized way is that you get your own hands dirty, and the scumbags are fine!”

It even kind of rhymed.

This time, Qi Guang didn’t look at him, taking a puff of his cigarette as he continued where he left off, “I really regret it. I wish I hadn’t done those things. Then, what happened later wouldn’t have happened.”

“Huh?” Brother Xu looked at him.

“I watched them argue hysterically, watched my mom run out of the house impulsively, and I couldn’t stop her no matter what. When I chased after her, she had already driven away. We didn’t know where she went until the hospital called, telling us about the car accident…”

“So your mom, she…” Brother Xu hesitated.

Yes, she died.

We all know she died in an accident. But for me, my dad was the indirect murderer, and I was the catalyst that led to it.

Qi Guang’s expression turned somewhat despondent, his eyes carrying a hint of sharpness. Brother Xu had never seen him like this before, and he felt a mixture of heartache and inexplicable anger.

Qi Guang smoked his cigarette, one puff at a time, not knowing if it was to mask the trembling in his hands or just a mechanical repetition of the action. Before long, another cigarette was finished.

He stubbed it out in the ashtray, “Not long after my mom passed away, he brought the mistress and her daughter home. Do you know how much I hated seeing my home occupied by strangers, seeing my mom’s things being used by others? I even had the urge to kill someone… I lived in darkness every day, and my life was a mess. Later, my grandpa was hospitalized, and I didn’t even have time to take care of it…”

Qi Guang’s eyes were red, his voice hoarse, “One day, Xiaoyun told me about grandpa’s death. I…”

My world completely collapsed at that moment.

Originally living in darkness, there was at least a star. After that, even the light from the stars was gone.

Only then did Brother Xu realize that Qi Guang was crying. He frantically grabbed a handful of tissues and began to wipe Qi Guang’s face, Qi Guang turned his head away, taking the tissues.

Brother Xu didn’t know how to comfort him, after all, he grew up carefree and never had such intense emotions.

But Qi Guang was different. He had family, and he had experienced happiness. To suddenly fall from a high place would be fatal.

He was wearing Brother Xu’s clothes, which appeared a bit baggy. The sleeves kept slipping down, and only then did Brother Xu notice the neat lines of knife scars on Qi Guang’s arm.

The wound from the little runt was long but not deep, and it was almost healed, but the new scars below it were even more noticeable now.

How did I not notice it last time!

Brother Xu grabbed his hand, looked carefully at it, frowned, and looked up at Qi Guang.

Qi Guang awkwardly pulled his hand back, taking a deep breath, “That was my darkest time. The only way to save myself was to leave that place. I ran back to Chen Town, and Xiaoyun arranged a school for me here and took me to see a therapist. I’ve never dared to think back to that summer, and I don’t know how I managed to survive till today.”

“Then you shouldn’t self-harm!” Brother Xu yelled at him.

“Living is pointless,” Qi Guang gave a cold laugh, tears still on his face, his smile looking bizarre, “You must have never felt the numbness of your limbs, the emptiness of your body. At that time, even dying wouldn’t have been painful.”

“Qi Guang!” Brother Xu was truly angry this time, he couldn’t stand seeing Qi Guang like this.

“Give me a cigarette,” Qi Guang said.

Brother Xu picked up the cigarette pack on the coffee table and tossed it further away, “You still know how to smoke, aren’t you saying life is pointless?!”

“Brother Xu,” Qi Guang looked at him, seriously, “It’s all in the past now. I’ve started my life again, can’t you see? Maybe in your eyes, I’m still doing badly, but I’m trying.”

Brother Xu’s eyes also turned a bit red, he reached out and hugged Qi Guang, patting his shoulder.

Three seconds later, Qi Guang pushed him away, drawling, “Ew—”

Then he wiped away the tears from his face.

When they were little, Brother Xu treated him like a younger brother, but now, the person before him was no longer childish. He was now a young man with an unusual maturity.

More than surprise or amazement, there was more heartache.

Brother Xu was very grateful that he had found Qi Guang again.

He even felt like he should thank the little runt in his heart.

“Finished talking,” Qi Guang stood up to go wash his face in the bathroom, “You can continue playing your game.”

“You’ve said that three times today,” Brother Xu grumbled.

Qi Guang splashed water on his face, gently rubbing his eyelids with his fingertips, “If you bother me again, I’ll say it a fourth time.”

Brother Xu called out towards the bathroom, “Today, you…”

How are you going to solve it today?

Before he could finish, Qi Guang interrupted him, “I’ll stay at your place for a bit today, and leave later.”

“You can stay for as long as you want. The point is, how are you going to solve it?” Brother Xu asked.

Qi Guang looked in the mirror, sighed, “He’s probably waiting at my door right now. I don’t want to fight someone in broad daylight, and especially not downstairs at my house.”

“Qi Guang?”

“Yeah?”

“Is it okay to not call me when you’re fighting?”

Qi Guang finally understood that due to the huge difference in their upbringing, the person in front of him couldn’t empathize with him. Only stimulating words like fighting and smashing cars could stir up his limited expressive desires, making him look like a small, high-spirited lion. Qi Guang couldn’t help but smile at the comparison and wished he could give the little lion a pat, “I was just saying, it’s not like I absolutely have to fight. I just… don’t really want to see him.”

“Why are you hiding?” Brother Xu asked again.

“I’m not hiding, I’m disgusted. I feel disgusted just seeing him,” Qi Guang said, emphasizing the last two words.

“You’ll have to face it eventually. No matter what kind of life you choose in the future, you always need to ‘choose’ first,” Brother Xu said.

Qi Guang knew what Brother Xu meant.

He looked at Brother Xu, and given the man’s fluctuating but still competent emotional intelligence, Qi Guang suddenly felt like he was probably too naive. Brother Xu was clearly wise and foolish at the same time!

But “wise” was an exaggeration. “Foolish” was the real deal.

He could act like a fool without changing his expression and seamlessly switch to a senior giving advice, something Zhou Tian could never pull off.

Qi Guang replied, “I thought I had already chosen.”

“No, you’re running, and you also know that he is looking for you,” Brother Xu said, with a cigarette hanging from his mouth, speaking like a senior again.

Qi Guang picked up the empty cigarette pack, shook it, then turned around to grab an ice-cold beer from the refrigerator, “Thank him for taking almost two years to find this place. If it were two years ago, I really don’t know what I would have done.”

“Killing someone will cost you your life, Qi Guang. You’re an adult now,” Brother Xu was determined to play the senior role to the end.

So the Brother Xu who said he’d tear off someone’s arm is gone now?

Alright, I’ll play along.

Qi Guang smiled, “My ID card says I’m not.”

“You shut your mouth!”

Brother Xu threw a lighter at him.