TSIBAMS Chapter 20
by VolareYe Xing held his phone, glanced up at Qi Guang who was fiddling with the projector, then at the tightly closed door, and then pressed the answer button, “Hello, Mom.”
“Xiao Xing, where did you go? I have to leave in a bit,” Fang Rong said, her tone as calm as ever, seemingly unaware that her phone had been touched.
“You’re leaving today?” Ye Xing asked.
“Yeah, there are still a lot of things that need to be taken care of,” Fang Rong replied.
What things could take so long to handle? Had she forgotten that she used to be a housewife who spent her days tending to flowers and plants?
What kind of life had she been living these days?
The house had been mortgaged, so where was she even staying?
Ye Xing had a million questions, but they were repeatedly pushed back down before they could even reach his lips.
Now wasn’t the right time for an open and honest conversation, at least not for Fang Rong. Her life must be a complete mess right now, and he couldn’t help at all!
Then at least he shouldn’t cause her any more trouble.
He should live independently, the way Fang Rong expected him to.
Thinking of his father’s imprisonment and not knowing when he might get out, Ye Xing couldn’t help but feel unable to face life calmly.
Although for the past dozen years, it had felt like there was no difference whether his father was there or not—he was always working, rarely came home, and had never really been a part of his life, not even a proper conversation.
He had grown used to the alienation that had accumulated over those ten years.
So when he connected his father with prison, he was shocked and had an overwhelming sense of unfamiliarity, as if he was completely outside of the situation.
Was that person really his father?
It wasn’t that he was cold-hearted; otherwise, why would he have lost control on the street earlier?
Ye Xing suppressed the turmoil in his heart, forcing himself not to ask, “Mom, go ahead and do your thing. Don’t worry about me. I won’t cause any trouble,” Ye Xing said, rubbing his sore nose, his voice muffled.
On the other end of the line, a relieved smile appeared on Fang Rong’s tired face, “Good son, I knew I could count on you.”
“Then…” Ye Xing paused, then continued, “when will you come back next time?”
Fang Rong didn’t answer right away.
She herself didn’t know when this would end.
When would things be considered resolved?
When would she get Lao Ye out of jail? When would all the debts be paid off?
She was completely overwhelmed.
And Ye Xing was at a critical point in high school, so she couldn’t afford any mistakes. She had to bear it all herself.
There was a long silence on the phone. Ye Xing didn’t become anxious like the last time; instead, he comforted her, “Mom, come whenever you can. Don’t overwork yourself, and… let’s stay in touch every day.”
Ye Xing’s sudden display of maturity almost brought tears to Fang Rong’s eyes. It was the only consolation she had received lately.
“The car’s here. I have to go. Goodbye,” she said, quickly hanging up, afraid of saying anything else.
“Goodbye…” Ye Xing replied to the busy tone coming from the phone.
Ye Xing was so calm that he felt like a stranger to himself, staring blankly at his phone.
Rather than being able to face everything so calmly because he was understanding, it was more like a sense of powerlessness and frustration.
Whenever something happened, his body was always the first to react, whether it was physical trembling or emotional impulsiveness, and only then could he calm down and tell himself there was nothing he could do, so stop struggling.
It was all like a dream.
Being in this place, meeting these people, living a life so different from before.
He was always someone who could adapt quickly wherever he was.
But from now on, he needed to accept that he would become someone who could live well, no matter who he was separated from.
If he didn’t have to accept these things he couldn’t accept before, then there would be no point to growth.
The phone had been black for a long time, but Ye Xing still remained in the same position.
Qi Guang had noticed Ye Xing’s unusual behavior today and also noticed that he had been staring at his black phone for a long time without moving. But he didn’t dare to disturb him. He could only pretend to be going back and forth between the bar and the projector to get things, and secretly glance at whether the guy was sleeping with his eyes open.
Finally, on his fifth trip to the bar, Ye Xing couldn’t take it anymore, “Can you stop moving around? You’re like a pendulum swinging in front of my eyes!”
“Oh, you’re not asleep,” Qi Guang said.
Qi Guang, who was halfway there, was interrupted by Ye Xing. He suddenly didn’t know what he was supposed to do at the bar, so he grabbed a kettle and filled Ye Xing’s cup with hot water.
“Really, I’m not a plant. I don’t need that much water. Even if I were a plant, you’d drown me,” Ye Xing protested, but his hand honestly took the cup and drank the water.
“You today…” Qi Guang started, then swallowed the question back down and changed it, “Wanna watch a movie? Try out the new projector.”
“Is it all set up?” Ye Xing looked up at the screen.
“It’s been ready for a while.”
“Well, after working on it for so long, if it wasn’t ready, I’d have to question your IQ,” Ye Xing said, looking away and continuing to drink his water.
Qi Guang sighed and didn’t argue with him.
“Classmate Ye Xing, Brother Qi won’t argue with you today, but I’ll remember it. If you poke at me again tomorrow, I’ll pay you back double,” Qi Guang said.
Ye Xing had already noticed that although Qi Guang didn’t ask or say much, he couldn’t hide his cautiousness.
Normally, Qi Guang wouldn’t miss any chance to start a verbal fight and anger him.
Qi Guang swiped on his phone while asking, “What kind of movies do you like?”
“Nothing specific, anything with a high rating,” Ye Xing replied.
“Then how about this one? It’s 9.1,” Qi Guang handed his phone to Ye Xing.
Ye Xing took the phone, looked at the poster on the screen, and read out, “Quiet as the Sea?”
“How about it? Have you seen it before?” Qi Guang took back the phone and asked.
Ye Xing wasn’t really in the mood to watch a movie, honestly his mind was a mess, and he just wanted to stay quiet, but this movie title fit his current state of mind, “Sure, this one then.”
The blinds in the bar had been drawn by Ye Xing and hadn’t been opened since. After turning off the lights, the whole shop went dark. When Qi Guang connected his phone to the projector and turned the sound up, it surprisingly felt like a real movie theater.
And for the first time, Ye Xing found the light from the movie to be so glaring.
He tried to immerse himself in the movie’s plot, squinting his eyes to read the subtitles, trying to cram the words into his brain and digest them.
He struggled for a long time before he realized he couldn’t focus at all.
After watching for over ten minutes, his mind was still blank. Only the dryness of his eyes reminded him that his senses were still there.
It was so fucking irritating. Why did his eyes feel so uncomfortable? Why was it getting harder to breathe? The calm and steady rhythm of the movie made it even harder for him to breathe. He knew very well that his tears were about to break loose.
But at least let the tears come at the emotional climax in the movie!
Finally, with the sound of the piano in the movie, Ye Xing could no longer control himself, and tears welled up, blurring his vision.
Damn it! He had failed!
Once the dam had burst, there was no turning back. Ye Xing simply cried out loud.
Qi Guang pulled out a couple of tissues and handed them over. Actually, he wasn’t surprised that Ye Xing was crying. In his eyes, Ye Xing today was like a balloon floating in a forest of cacti; it was bound to pop sooner or later. He just didn’t expect him to pop so quickly.
He thought he would at least have a few drinks first.
He also didn’t expect this guy to cry like a little girl.
Ye Xing continued to cry to himself, his eyelashes wet with tears, making it difficult to open his eyes. He didn’t even see the tissues being offered.
Qi Guang sighed and helped Ye Xing wipe away his tears, “Your face is all wet, little girl.”
“You fu…!” Ye Xing took the tissues with his right hand, pressed them against his brow, and lowered his head, “I’m not a little girl.”
“Want to talk about it? If it’s okay with you,” Qi Guang said, not knowing what had happened or how to comfort him.
Ye Xing kept his head down, “Can I trust you?”
Qi Guang found the question quite amusing. Only little girls would ask that when crying.
But if he thought about it carefully—
Ye Xing, as one of the few people who had been to his house and even slept in his bed, he didn’t seem to have ever considered the issue of trust. Everything had happened so naturally.
There were many things that you only realized you had already overlooked when you actually became aware of them.
Before he could answer Ye Xing’s question, Ye Xing suddenly asked, “Do you know what illegal fundraising is?”
Qi Guang frowned. Just hearing the first two words was enough to know how serious it was.
Ye Xing continued, “I just found out today, my dad’s in jail.”
Qi Guang’s eyes widened. After the shock, he quickly recovered. After all, in his own experiences, other people’s lives were still within expectations.
But for Ye Xing, it was as if the sky had fallen. This teenager, who had had a smooth upbringing, must never have cried like this before.
He patted Ye Xing’s back, “Did your mom tell you?”
Ye Xing lifted his head, looking forward blankly, “My mom didn’t say anything. I went through her phone… something about illegal fundraising and bankruptcy… hah, I know nothing, I understand nothing.”
Ye Xing took a deep breath and repeated with self-mockery, “I know nothing…”
Qi Guang, in his limited experience, had never comforted anyone. He looked at Ye Xing’s state and felt a little sorry, but he didn’t know how to start. After thinking for a while, he said, “Ye Xing, there must be a reason why your aunt didn’t tell you.”
“Yeah, that’s right… And I can’t help at all. Besides… don’t laugh at me, but I’m not close to my dad. Actually… I don’t really know what kind of person he is. But he is my dad, after all. How can I not be sad that this has happened. I don’t know how to say it. I probably… I probably… Ah, Qi Guang, give me a drink,” Ye Xing said. It was the first time that he had felt that talking was so difficult; he had to either catch his breath or talk, he had to manage his time.
He touched his face, and, damn, he was crying again.
Qi Guang asked, “What do you want to drink?”
“Do you have anything that makes you forget your troubles after drinking it? Something like ‘How can I relieve my worries, only with Du Kang’s wine’, something like that,” Ye Xing continued to stare blankly ahead.
“We don’t have a ‘forget your troubles’ drink, but we have a ‘lose your senses’ drink,” Qi Guang said.
Ye Xing finally snapped back, “What the hell? What kind of a bar is this?”
Qi Guang smirked and stood up to go to the bar.
When he came back, he was holding two full glasses of beer, “Come on, I’ll secretly give you a glass of ice-cold beer. It’s on me.”
“You’re embarrassed to call this treating me,” Ye Xing took the beer.
“Take it or leave it. The bartender doesn’t work until tomorrow.”
Qi Guang paused the movie and got up to open the window. Ye Xing stopped him, “Leave it as it is, don’t open the window, it’s glaring.”
“Alright, I’ll turn on a dim light to illuminate.”
Qi Guang turned on the light and turned off the projector.
The so-called “dim” light was indeed dim. Ye Xing almost thought he was drinking wine in a basement.