Nanke Yifu Chapter 28
byWild geese come and go (9)
The house was no different from when he left. Even the orientation of the toothbrushes in the mouthwash cup had not changed, but the items on the bedroom door had been moved to the study door.
In this regard, Chi Fu explained: “It is also closed when closing the bedroom, and it is also closed when closing the study. Of course, it will make you sleep more comfortably.”
He confirmed the taste with Yan Laixi and took out a box of lunch meat from the refrigerator. He was very lucky and did not step on the countless landmines in Yan Laixi’s recipe.
The aroma of grilled fish filled the room, and the golden corn kernels were placed in a bowl. The salad dressing was served on a separate small plate without being mixed together. Yan Laixi said he liked to eat it without the sauce.
Yan Laixi didn’t eat much, but said he was very satisfied with the meal.Chi Fu couldn’t tell whether it was true that he was satisfied with the grilled fish, but it must be true that he was satisfied with the corn kernels. In the second half of the meal, Yan Laixi’s chopsticks were basically heading towards the bowl of corn kernels. Chi Fu handed him a spoon, and he said he liked to eat with it.He likes to eat corn kernels with chopsticks, Chi Fu thought, and learned another strange little hobby of Yan Laixi, which he will write down in his notebook soon.
Yan Laixi picked up his phone and took a look at it. He suddenly stood up and said that he was in a hurry at work and had to go out. He asked Chi Fu to wait for him at home.
Chi Fu didn’t know if Yan Laixi had any work matters that suddenly required him to go out, but since it was work, it was better not to follow him and disturb him.
His birthday was less than a week away, and he got himself a reward of meeting Yan Laixi less than a week in advance, which seemed to make Yan Laixi happy.
Now that the man is back, the next step is to continue to fill in his tattered memory, and to find a way to more quickly stuff the contents of the small notebook into his empty brain every morning.
The next step is to find a way to sleep in separate rooms with Yan Laixi.
Chi Fu flicked his forehead with his finger. This abnormal and good lover was treated like a roommate.
It was already not very early when Yan Laixi went out. Chi Fu went to bed early recently. Although it was not yet time to go to bed, Yan Laixi still had something urgent to do. He was bored alone and felt a little confused while waiting. He fell down on the sofa with a pillow in his arms and fell asleep.
Even before it comes out of the oven, the smell of grilled fish has already spread throughout the house. The finished product is on the table, with an attractive color. It should be fragrant and delicious, just like the grilled fish Chi Fu made for him for the first time.
Probably, because Yan Laixi doesn’t want to eat anything now and has no appetite for anything.
He regretted a little. Grilled fish was really a wrong choice. He should have chosen something lighter.Corn and fish are better. Although the former has a layer of oil on top that makes you want to put it in your mouth, it won’t absorb too much soup. The latter can be chosen a little higher and has a lighter taste.
Pancakes filled with soup and dripping with oil are a form of torture.
You have to disobey your brain’s prohibition, you have to hold back the feeling of spitting out things in your mouth, you have to suppress the twitching of nausea, you have to behave naturally and not let Chi Fu see it, and eating a meal can’t be said to be hard, it can be said to be painful.
Halfway through eating, Yan Laixi felt really uncomfortable in his stomach, so he focused on the bowl of corn kernels.
It’s light, easy to import and swallow, and with one pill at a time, you can linger for a long time without eating much.
Yan Laixi originally thought that he would at least finish the meal with Chi Fu.
His stomach was churning, and he could hardly hide the twitching in his abdomen. It happened that Yan Laixi saw the mobile phone placed aside.
I thought of an excuse.
For the first time, Yan Laixi felt that not everything caused by Chi Fu’s amnesia was bad.Just like now, he can use work as an excuse to leave Chi Fu and run out alone. The other party will not find it strange that he suddenly needs to go out to deal with work late at night and does not even have time to change clothes. Even if he does, he will only think that it is because of amnesia and he does not know his work.
The moment the door closed, Yan Laixi bent down, put the heel of one hand against his stomach, and rubbed his chest with the other hand. He did not dare to run, as he would feel more nauseous, so he could only move to the elevator as fast as possible while maintaining stability.
Yan Laixi ran over the last ten meters away from the public restroom.
He rushed over, not even caring about accidentally knocking himself on the edge of the stage. He lay down by the pool and vomited everything he had just eaten.
After the food is vomited, gastric juice mixed with chyme begins to be vomited, and then almost all the vomited out is liquid.
There was severe pain in his stomach and discomfort in his chest. Yan Laixi bent over, supporting the table with his right hand, the palm of his left hand against his stomach, and his elbow against the edge of the table.He walked in a hurry when he came out. He didn’t change the clothes inside, so he took a coat. It was a bit cold, but it was good to be colder, which could clear his mind.
Finally, he stopped spitting out things. Yan Laixi rinsed his mouth with the cold water flowing from the faucet, took a deep breath, leaned to the side, and used swallowing to suppress the remaining feeling of retching.He looked at his collar and saw that it was wet. He would have to wait for a while before going home.
The wet collar was stuck to the skin and was blown by the cold wind. Yan Laixi raised his hand and rolled the collar down. The exposed skin was in direct contact with the cold air. It was cold, but it was better than being covered with a layer of wet cloth.
He walked aimlessly under the night sky, waiting for the cold wind to dry his wet collar.
When they were just having dinner, Chi Fu asked him if he wanted to continue hiding the truth from his family and make a confession.He must hide it. He is already twenty-eight during the Chinese New Year and a third-year-old. There is no reason for his mother to worry about him anymore.His confession was quite correct, but the problem was that he looked so sick that even makeup couldn’t hide it.
The Chinese New Year is coming soon, and I still have to find an excuse not to go back.
What’s the excuse?Sick?Something happened suddenly?It doesn’t work. Not to mention anything else, even if it takes a day or two, it won’t be able to delay him from adjusting his condition.It’s better to find a way to look like a normal person with makeup and clothes. Anyway, winter clothes are thick, so as long as you keep your head clear, there will be no problem.
It’s too late to learn on your own now, and Chi Fu seems to only be able to put on light makeup, so it’s better to find a professional.
It felt like it was extremely cold this winter. Not to mention drying his collar, he was afraid he would freeze if he kept blowing for a while. Yan Laixi returned to the building and hid in the stairwell. It would be much warmer here, and the probability of meeting anyone was very small.
Yan Laixi felt that his mind should be busy now, with multiple threads unfolding at the same time. Here he was thinking about how to hide the matter between him and Chi Fu, and there he was thinking about what he and Chi Fu would do next. In the middle, he had to go back and explain how Chi Fu would ask him what he was doing.
But the fact is that Yan Laixi’s mind is blank.
It’s as if a less critical gear that controls the brain’s operation is stuck. It can still move and be used, but only enough to maintain the most basic actions.
Yan Laixi wanted to turn it around, think about it, want a solution, anything, an acceptable result, and an answer on how to get this result.But his brain was bound to go on strike today. After being pushed and turned around twice by him, it started to freeze again. Until he stood at the door of his house, he couldn’t think of anything.
When he left last time, Yan Laixi deleted his information from the smart lock and only took away a spare key.Yan Laixi didn’t have time to add his personal information, and he didn’t intend to add it. He was in a hurry when he went out just now, and he put the keys in his bag, but he didn’t take them. He raised his middle finger and knocked on the door three times, but nothing happened for a long time.
He sent a message to Chi Fu, turned around and sat on the ground beside the door, looking at the night sky outside the corridor.
The open one-sided corridor is cold in winter and hot in summer. Yan Laixin tightened his collar and looked at the unchanged dialog box.He had previously cleared all his contact information on Chi Fu’s phone. Although he could still contact Chi Fu unilaterally, there should be no notification sound when sending Chi Fu a message.
In fact, you can call directly, and there will be a ringtone, but Yan Laixi thinks it doesn’t matter if you wait for a while.
What are you doing?Cleaning up the housework?bath?Just like his excuse just now, he suddenly had something to do and went out.
Yan Laixi retracted his hands into his sleeves and pulled on the hem of his clothes to cover his legs.My fingers were a little stiff, my ears hurt a little from the cold, and a bad thought suddenly came to my mind.
Half asleep and half awake, a tingling sensation kicked his consciousness, which was wandering and not knowing which way he was going to fall, back to consciousness. Chi Fu carefully moved his “seriously injured” arm, looking around in confusion, wondering if Yan Laixi was back.
The room was quiet, and Yan Laixi’s slippers were still there at the entrance. Chi Fu stretched out his good hand to touch his phone, unlocked the lock screen, and saw a strange message reminder.He tried to move his numb arms, sat up slowly, clicked on the message, and after seeing the five words clearly, he took off.
Unknown number: “Open the door for me.”
He pushed open the door suddenly and subconsciously looked forward. If he didn’t see anyone, he took a step out.
“Go back!”
He held a hand in front of him and said in a reproachful tone: “Why are you running around blindly? Why don’t you even wear slippers?”
Chi Fu then looked down and saw Yan Laixi sitting by the door.
Where Yan Laixi was sitting, Chi Fu should have been able to catch a glimpse of someone there from the corner of his eye, but he never expected that Yan Laixi didn’t go to the corridor or go out to find a place to stay for a while, just sitting at the door blowing the cold wind.
If he didn’t wake up, wouldn’t Yan Laixi have to freeze outside all night?
“Come in, Nuan Nuan, I’m sorry, I fell asleep.” Chi Fu reached out to fish out Yan Laixi, and found an armful of cold food. His clothes and hands were all cold.
He pulled Yan Laixi into the room, closed the door, and touched Yan Laixi’s face. Even his hair was cold to the touch, and he saw his ears that were red from the cold and his slightly open collar. His brain was occupied by heartache, and the little spare time he squeezed out was used to think about how to keep Yan Laixi warm and not get sick.
So much so that Chi Fu didn’t notice the unreasonableness at all.
Yan Lai didn’t know his number, why didn’t he call him directly?Yan Laixi has already taken the initiative to send him a message. He can just reply directly after seeing it. There is no need to worry about not being able to contact him. Why sit at the door and wait?The coat Yan Laixi wore had a hood, and the zipper buttons were all tied to the top, so that half of his face could be buried in it. Why should the collar be undone instead?
Chi Fu hurriedly got the warm water, handed the twisted hot towel to Yan Laixi, and asked him to soak his hands and feet and wipe his face. He ran back to the bedroom, found a blanket, put it on Yan Laixi, and ran to boil hot water. There was nothing he could do. Yan Laixi said he didn’t drink ginger tea and it was too slow to cook porridge.
After pouring cold water into the steaming cup, Chi Fu tested the temperature before handing it to Yan Laixi.The other party had already warmed up, took off his coat, and the blanket he had just put on fell on the sofa.After he was completely settled, Chi Fu’s flying IQ came back: “Please wait a moment, and then let’s enter the information first. If there is another emergency and you can’t get in, just call me directly, or go somewhere else to stay for a while, don’t freeze outside.”
“I’ll record it later.” Yan Laixi held the hot water in both hands, drank it in small sips, and said, “It’s okay, it’s not that cold outside.”
“Something’s wrong!” Chi Fu said one word at a time. He touched Yan Laixi’s ears to confirm that he was no longer so cold, and then he breathed a sigh of relief. “What should I do if I get cold?”
“Why did you go to bed so early?” Yan Laixi asked.
“I’m so bored waiting for you.” Chi Fu fell down and rested his head on Yan Laixi’s lap. Yan Laixi rubbed his head and rubbed it again, “And I’ve been going to bed early lately.”
Yan Laixi: “So you still remember what happened during the day?”
“Yeah.” Chi Fu nodded, “I won’t go to bed that early, around ten o’clock. What about you? Do you still go to bed in the morning?”
Yan Laixi shook his head and said, “Absolutely the same as you.”
“Hehe, that’s good.” Chi Fu smiled stupidly and leaned into Yan Laixi’s arms, saying, “It’s a pity that we can’t sleep together, but it would be so sad if we have to sleep through the time we can spend together.”
“You go back to the bedroom and sleep.” Yan Laixi said suddenly.
Chi Fu was pleasantly surprised at first, then wilted: “Let’s forget it. Let’s wait until I find a way to put the memory into my brain before waking up.”
Although they couldn’t really go back to the bedroom to sleep with Yan Laixi, Yan Laixi was willing to sleep with him and took the initiative to ask him if he wanted to go back to the bedroom to sleep. This was enough to make Chi Fulian and Yan Laixi happy when they went back to the study and locked the door after saying good night.
When he saw Chi Fu hurriedly running out barefoot, Yan Laixi was condemning himself in his heart.But he had to admit that Chi Fu’s busy and caring look did satisfy his bad desire.
The hands stretched out are warm, the blankets given are warm, and the water handed to them are also warm. It is probably because they have just come back from the cold wind, so they are extra warm and comfortable.
Yan Laixi wanted to put on the blanket for a while, but it was really too hot.
Chi Fu asked him to re-enter the information into the door lock, but Yan Lai confused him.If you have made a complete decision to come back or stay, when you still can’t stand it anymore and want to leave, you have to struggle hard in your heart.
When Chi Fu said he was asleep when he walked in, Yan Laixi actually didn’t pay much attention to it. He just thought he was sleepy after eating and took a nap. However, Chi Fu said that he had been going to bed early recently.
This early bedtime is probably not the early bedtime for their original schedule.
However, Chi Fu didn’t look like he had just gotten to know him again through texts and photos, so Yan Laixi asked, “So you still remember what happened during the day?”
Chi Fu nodded, and his hair brushed against his hand, as if being rubbed by a small animal.
Chi Fu said that he would go to bed after ten o’clock now, and asked Yan Laixi about his daily routine, and Yan Laixi said it was similar to him.He left the medicine on the bedside table, and he probably wouldn’t be able to sleep. It made Chi Fu think that if they had similar schedules, they wouldn’t have to pretend to be asleep for a long time, and they could pretend to have just woken up if they were discovered.
It’s not entirely a lie to say that his schedule is about the same. The times he falls asleep and wakes up are completely irregular these days, and he might fall asleep at about the same time as Chi Fu on a few occasions.
Yan Laixi suddenly remembered that Chi Fu said that he would let him sleep in the bedroom and sleep in the study, saying that it was to make him sleep more comfortably.
In fact, there is no need at all. He wouldn’t be comfortable sleeping anywhere anyway.
“You go back to the bedroom and sleep.” Yan Laixi said to Chi Fu. He wanted to change with Chi Fu, but the other party seemed to have misunderstood something.
His bright eyes dimmed again, and his hair seemed to droop and wilt. Chi Fu said, “Let’s forget it. Let’s wait until I find a way to put the memory into my brain before I wake up.”
Do you want to sleep together?
Yan Laixi also thought about it.
But rather than sleeping together, Yan Laixi didn’t want Chi Fu to find out that he would be unable to sleep all night long. He didn’t want to hear the first words Chi Fu said to him after opening his eyes in the morning, such as “Who are you?”
As his eyes gradually adapted to the darkness, Yan Laixi stared at the ceiling in a daze.
Sure enough, I couldn’t sleep.
As soon as I close my eyes, I will start thinking wildly, worrying about this and that.He reached out to touch the other half of the empty bed and asked himself for the umpteenth time, was the choice he made now really the right one?
If Chi Fu forgets him in front of him again, can he really accept it?If they leave again, can they still be in contact?
He promised to spend the birthday with Chi again, at least to spend these few days smoothly, at least to complete the birthday. This is likely to be the last birthday to spend together.
There was a small clock in the living room, one with a jumping second movement. Yan Laixi took it into the bedroom and placed it on the bedside. He lay back on the bed and listened to the click of the second hand.The sound made light shine through the cracks in the curtains, and Yan Laixi began to pay attention to the movement outside the door.
I didn’t want to eat, so I planned to pretend to be asleep to avoid breakfast.
The first thing that broke the rhythmic silence was the sound of the study door being pushed open.He heard Chi Fu’s footsteps getting closer and closer, and closed his eyes, but he did not hear the sound of the bedroom door being pushed open. Instead, he heard a word of good morning that was not loud and could not be heard clearly because there was a door across the door.
He heard footsteps receding, heard the clinking of kitchen utensils, heard the sound of water flowing, heard the sound of cloth rubbing against each other, and heard “I’m out” as soft as the good morning.
After hearing the door closing, Yan Laixi lay there for a while. After confirming that there was no more movement outside, he sat up from the bed and planned to wash his face first.
Lying in the same position for too long, his back was a little sore. Yan Laixi looked at himself in the mirror and was still in the mood to joke with himself, thinking that makeup might not be able to hide his inhuman appearance, so he would have to wear a mask.
There was breakfast left for him by Chi Fu on the table. Yan Laixi glanced at it and saw that he had no appetite, but he still took a bite, only to rush back to the bathroom and vomit.
You can’t go on like this. You have to eat and sleep, or your body won’t be able to bear it.Yan Laixi knew that he should not take medicine without permission, nor should he stop taking medicine suddenly, but he had already done so, and now he could only find a way to eat something and sleep for a while.
He made himself a bowl of egg soup, and his condition seemed to be a little worse. He could eat something before, but now he wanted to push away the food when he saw it. Drinking something would be easier to swallow, and he didn’t know if he could swallow it without vomiting.
After forcing himself to drink less than half the bowl, he vaguely felt that his stomach was starting to resist, and the feeling of retching gradually became stronger. Yan Laixi put down the bowl and planned to walk around the room for a while and then lie down to try to sleep for a while.
Near lunch time, Chi Fu sent a message, asking if he was awake and wanted to have dinner together, but Yan Laixi prevaricated him.
He is very tired and sleepy now, but he just can’t sleep. However, he was confused for a while. He might have fallen asleep, but he didn’t know. After all, the way Yan Laixi can tell whether he fell asleep or not is whether he saw Feng Su.
Guessing that the time was almost up, Yan Laixi got up and fried two vegetables, put them on a plate and put them aside. When Chi Fu came back, he told him that he had eaten.
The meal felt like self-abuse. The smell of the oil fumes made Yan Laixi feel nauseous. He turned off the stove and ran to the bathroom to retching, then came back to continue. The dishes he cooked intermittently probably didn’t taste that good. Fortunately, Chi Fu didn’t choose. He just said that he would come back early tomorrow and wanted to eat with Yan Laixi.Yan Laixi said that he had breakfast so late today and didn’t have lunch, so he ate so early in the evening. He would wait for him tomorrow and there was no need to come back early.
After dinner, Chi Fu pestered him, holding a small notebook, and asked him to talk about many things he didn’t know yet, and he listened and took notes.Yan Laixi took a look at the diary when Chi Fu was not at home. It was almost full and it took a while to read it all, not to mention that Chi Fu had to remember the contents while reading it.
It was also very hard for Chi Fu to be with him.
Chi Fu tiptoed out of the study. It was written in the notebook that Yan Laixi would wake up later than him, so he had to be careful not to wake anyone up. He tried to make breakfast as quietly as possible, saving Yan Laixi’s share. After packing himself up, he returned to the study and sat on the bed, holding a small book in his hands, planning to read it again.
He hummed a tune softly unconsciously, walked with a bumpy tone when he went out, and even his smile when handing the guests drinks was much brighter than usual.A few regular customers looked at his appearance with little flowers sprouting from his back and asked him what good thing had happened to him that made him so happy today.
It’s not that something good has happened, it’s that something good is coming soon.
Tomorrow is his birthday, and it is written in the notebook that Yan Laixi will celebrate his birthday with him.By the way, we are going to be closed tomorrow, so we need to put up the sign.
Before it was time to get off work, Chi Fu couldn’t wait to pack up his things and close the door and go home. After all, it was his own store, so he could close it at any time he wanted.
He hasn’t seen Yan Laixi with his own eyes yet.
It wasn’t until a moving, living person appeared in front of him, with his heart beating so fast that it almost broke through his chest, that Chi Fu finally felt real.It’s not a game or someone’s prank, he really has a lover.
It’s just that his lover also looks really unhealthy.
He knew that Yan Laixi’s physical condition might not be very good. This was mentioned in the book more than once, but he didn’t expect it to be so bad. He was so weak that a gust of wind could take him away.
Even Yan Laixi like this is still so beautiful that people can’t take their eyes away. Even her morbid fragility becomes a boost and arouses people’s desire for protection.But Chi Fu doesn’t like it. He likes Yan Laixi, and he likes everything. Whether it’s makeup or acting, Yan Laixi like this can still haunt him, but not now. Yan Laixi is really uncomfortable, really sick.
Yan Laixi seemed to be holding on to his energy and didn’t even eat a few bites of dinner. He said he ate too many snacks in the afternoon and wasn’t hungry now.Chi Fu really wanted to pester Yan Laixi to stay with him for a while, but looking at the dark blue under his eyes, he still urged Yan Laixi to go to bed early.
It doesn’t matter, anyway, Yan Laixi will stay with him all day tomorrow. Anyway, they will stay together every day, not less than this moment.
Chi Fu fell asleep with anticipation, and got an incredible surprise when he woke up.
He was looking forward to his birthday yesterday. No, it should be that the reason why he was so looking forward to his birthday yesterday was because someone would spend it with him.
Only then did Chi Fu notice that there seemed to be some movement outside the study.He poked his head out and saw a thin figure busy in the kitchen.
Tiptoeing closer, Chi Fu originally wanted to rush over and give the person a big hug, but he was afraid that he would cause trouble and overwhelm the person again, so he chose to open his arms at the moment Yan Laixi looked back at him, waiting for the beauty to take the initiative to “throw himself into his arms.”
Yan Laixi smiled helplessly and fondly, holding up his flour-covered hands, he hugged him cooperatively, and then asked Chi Fu to turn around to see if there was any flour on his clothes before sending him to wash up.
She’s too thin and feels a little awkward to hold, so she has to find a way to make her fatter.
Chi Fu himself found it incredible – even though he must have been like this many times – that he could so easily accept a lover who appeared out of thin air, so quickly adopt a familiar attitude, and be happy to be close to the other person.
Chi Fu, Chi Fu, how can you be so addicted to beauty.
No, it’s definitely not beauty, at least it’s not just or mainly because of beauty.
That feeling as if every nerve is connected to the other person’s body, and every cell is clamoring for him to get closer. No matter how beautiful you are, no matter how stunning love at first sight is, it can’t bring you.
Although Chi Fu is a person who loves cooking, it is also the first time for him – at least the first time in his current memory – that he feels that making food with his own hands is such a wonderful thing.
To be more precise, it should be said that making food with Yan Laixi’s company is such a wonderful thing.
Just quietly prick up your ears and you can hear that pleasant voice whispering the steps and proportions.Just move your eyes slightly and you can see the dough forming under those long and beautiful fingers.Just by tilting your head slightly, you can see that the soft black hair is tucked behind the ears and falls down due to lack of length.
With a “ding” sound, the oven door was opened, and only a small part of the aroma that was originally locked inside escaped in an instant, spreading all over the room and entering Chi Fu’s nasal cavity.Yan Laixi put on baking gloves, took out the baking pan, held the two ends of the mold, shook it a few times, and placed it upside down on the cooling rack that had been set up in advance.The biscuits pressed out of the mold took over the position of the cake embryo, and the oven continued to work. Then, he took out the cream from the refrigerator compartment, poured it into the egg beater, and turned around to look at Chi Fu.
The hand that had just picked up the eggbeater turned around and handed it to Chi Fu. Yan Laixi asked him briefly: “Will you?”
Chi Fu nodded.
Yan Laixi thrust the eggbeater into his hand: “Then come.”
The labor force was finally remembered to be used. The user was half-lying on the sofa, with his head propped up and his eyelids drooping, while the supervisor was distracted.
Chi Fu looked at the person on the sofa and felt that he was not energetic.
“Are you sleepy? What time did you wake up? Do you want to sleep a little longer?”
The hair hanging in front of his eyebrows swayed with the owner’s movements, and the amber eyes were hidden behind. Due to the distance, they were looming. They should have looked confused and affectionate, but Chi Fu felt like a small insect that approached actively, waited patiently, and finally got what it wanted, wrapped in resin.
Chi Fu thought that he knew what he wanted to make for this year’s birthday.
Wait until the sky gets dark, wait until the cake he has been looking forward to all day is finally brought to the table, wait until the warm candlelight reflects on Yan Laixi’s face and Chi Fu’s eyes.He clasped his hands together but refused to close his eyes.
Yan Laixi told him to close his eyes when making a wish.
“But I want to keep looking at you.” Chi Fu said.
Then, a not-so-warm hand reached out and covered his eyelids.
“Make a wish and you can continue to look at me.”
When the palm left, Chi Fu didn’t open his eyes in a hurry.He heard that you have to be sincere when making a wish. If you repeat it in your heart a few times, will the effect be better?
Yan Laixi asked him what wish he had made for so long.
Chi Fu didn’t tell him that the wish wouldn’t work if he said it.
He hoped that he could remember their past, that he would never lose the memory of Yan Laixi, and that he could always be by Yan Laixi’s side.
If you say your wish, it won’t work.
Is it because he is too greedy?It turns out that even if your wish is not expressed, it will not work.
Chi Fu never knew that so many things could happen in one minute.
One minute can make a stranger suddenly appear next to him, make him bump into each other because of this stranger, make him watch the expression on the other person’s face change from confused and at a loss, to despair, and then become like a trace of relief. Let him watch a stranger crying uncontrollably in front of him, but he can only stand there with a blank mind.
The man was thin, looked weak, and looked like he was in pain from crying.
Chi Fu knew that this description was strange. He didn’t yell or smash anything. He just stood there quietly and shed tears. His breathing gradually became faster and heavier, and he didn’t even make any other sounds.But Chi Fu just felt that it hurt when he cried. The person opposite felt hurt, and he himself felt hurt too.
The man put his hands behind his back and wanted to say something. After several attempts, he succeeded in making a normal sound.
He said: “If you keep doing this, I really don’t want you anymore.”
Obviously they don’t know each other, why “again”?Why “no more”?Chi Fu didn’t understand, but he knew that the person in front of him was about to leave him.And when he thought of this, his heart hurt as if it was being held by a hand and crushed to pieces.
Chi Fu thought, maybe he did something wrong. Is it a mistake that can be undone?Hopefully the answer is yes.
But that person was apologizing to him again.
His mind was rushed into a mess by a large amount of information, and he just stood there without saying a word. Something in his body was desperately clamoring for him to do something to keep the person in front of him, but his limbs were unable to react at all.
Finally, he heard the man say: “Chi Fu, let’s do this.”
Chi Fu knew that he had already made a decision, and now he was just informing himself.
No matter what you do, it will be in vain.
He looked at the man’s back, saw him walking out of the house, and saw that he didn’t even want to take one last look at himself.Or maybe he actually saw it because his eyes were too blurry and he didn’t see these small details clearly.
Chi Fu wiped away the liquid that blocked his vision, but it couldn’t be wiped clean.
Unexplained tears.
As if tears can keep that person.
It was really inexplicable tears.
Once again awakened from a brief dream, Yan Laixi lay on the bed to relax for a while, curled up his fingers, and tapped his groggy head with the heel of his palm.
He had been thinking about the same thing these past few days. Even though there was no need to confirm, he still looked at the calendar – December 21st, Chi Fu’s birthday.
It was still dark before Yan Laixi got off the bed. He was unsteady when he stood up, but he still managed to hold himself up by the head of the bed.I don’t want to sleep anymore anyway, so why not get up and do something.
On the kitchen counter were the ingredients and tools he had prepared before going to bed, but Yan Laixi came to the sofa and sat down without looking.His stomach was abnormally upset now. He would feel vomiting easily when he woke up. He would also feel vomiting when eating or smelling something. Although he just planned to bake a cake, there was no guarantee that he wouldn’t choke on the raised flour and start coughing. Coughing would still make him want to vomit.
Therefore, Yan Laixi thought that he might as well wait until the nausea crisis that was waiting to explode subsided a little before he started working. Anyway, he had plenty of time.
He originally planned to bake a cake, but he didn’t have anything else to do. He sat on the sofa, picked up his phone, and searched for cookie baking tutorials on social platforms.
Yan Laixi only has one account. Anyway, he is not very interested in sharing his private life on the platform. A Nanke account is completely enough. Therefore, it is almost inevitable to see some readers’ posts on the recommendation page.
Even though he quickly clicked on the search, he still caught a glimpse of an article, the general content of which was waiting for him to start a new serial.
Let alone writing novels, if he were to sit in front of the computer now with his hands on the keyboard, it would be difficult for him to control himself from being distracted.
His fingertips were tapping quickly on the screen, and each exquisite or cute cookie cover came into view. Yan Laixi tried his best to forget about the few words he had just accidentally glanced at, and not to think about the novel.
For him, writing is not just work. It was first for recording, and later, it was also for responding.
Those who read his articles, those who like the words he wrote, since they are sent out by his own hands, since they have given a beginning, they must also give a decent ending.
He can’t give it now, let alone the ending, or even the process. Only the beginning that was written long ago is decent.Since we can’t give an ending, it’s better not to start.
The tray was put into the preheated oven, and when Yan Laixi started preparing the ingredients for making cookies, there was a rustling sound in the study.Chi Fu must have woken up and was flipping through his little book.
Based on the experience of the past few days, he estimated that the person would be out soon. Yan Laixi cheered up, tried to look less tired, and planned to face this “first meeting” with a natural attitude.
But at this time, there was a big problem with the precision of the hand for pouring flour. For such a big bowl, only a thin layer of dust-like flour floated in, and the rest was half caught by the countertop and half by the ground.
He hurriedly collected the spilled flour, and just when he looked less embarrassed, before he could wash his hands, he heard the sound of the door lock turning from behind.
Yan Laixi felt that he must be quite talented in acting. Even though he was in a state of rapid heartbeat and inexplicable guilt, he still perfectly performed the image of accidentally finding his lover standing behind him and giving him a good morning hug.
He urged Chi Fu to wash up, and he took advantage of this time to quickly pack away the remaining flour.It was just a little flour accidentally sprinkled on it. If Chi Fu found out, nothing would happen. Yan Laixi didn’t know why he did this.
Chi Fu’s eyes were always stuck on him, just like the year they first met, the kind of gaze that made him feel familiar and nostalgic.
Missing it doesn’t mean wishing it would happen again.
So Yan Laixi planned to change his position with Chi Fu’s, and he would play the role of staring at people intently.
The egg beater made a lot of noise, but Yan Laixi thought it was just right. Chi Fu’s attention was on the basin of cream, and he could look at Chi Fu quietly.
Chi Fu’s appearance and figure tend to be soft. Unlike Yan Laixi, who is slender and beautiful with a bit of skinny, Chi Fu looks like a cute boy.There are no obvious muscle lines, but he is not thin either. His facial features and face are not angular, but he does not look feminine.Coupled with his braid hanging down the back of his neck and his somewhat childish personality, at the age of twenty-four, from the inside out, he still seems to be the same as he was when he was nineteen. It seems that he will never grow up.
Now even the memory has been separated into a part, staying at the time when I was nineteen years old.
When there was only dim candlelight left in the room, Chi Fu, who had been looking forward to the birthday cake all day like a seven or eight-year-old child, quietly got into a temper and refused to close his eyes and make a wish.
Yan Laixi stretched out her hand to cover his eyes. When she felt the eyelashes slowly brushing against her palms, she counted five numbers silently in her mind before returning to her position.
The firelight was weak, but it illuminated Chi Fu’s eyelashes clearly. Yan Laixi sat in the dark, waiting for a long time for him to open his eyes.
Just when Yan Laixi was about to wonder if someone could fall asleep in the wish-making position, those eyes that seemed to be rippling with water reappeared with a smile.
Yan Laixi was a little curious as to why it took so long to make a wish. Chi Fu didn’t tell him, saying that the wish wouldn’t work when he said it.
Yan Laixi smiled and didn’t ask any more questions. He didn’t believe this. It would come true whether he said it or not, and vice versa.But if Chi Fu wants to believe it, then he is willing to cooperate.
Birthdays, or ordinary birthdays spent with loved ones, are a happy event, both for the person celebrating the birthday and the person accompanying them.
Happiness is a good thing, but everything has two sides, and happiness can also make your mind unclear.
The hour hand kept turning, eight, nine, ten, eleven… Chi Fu didn’t notice, and neither did Yan Laixi.
Shocked and unexpected, with a slightly worried expression and a half-step back subconsciously, the play he least wanted to watch again suddenly appeared in front of him. Yan Laixi himself couldn’t say whether he felt more despair or relief at that moment.
He felt desperate for the connection between him and Chi Fu, and felt relieved that he could finally end this delayed scene that was destined to not have a good ending.
Tears welled up and fell uncontrollably, his heartbeat and breathing started racing without permission, his left hand gradually became stiff, and his fingers began to become numb.Yan Laixi put his hands behind his back and stroked them with his right hand, which was still slightly trembling.
He wanted to say something, but his rapid breathing and choking prevented him from saying a complete sentence.In fact, even if there were no such effects, he probably wouldn’t be able to tell.
What does that count now?Sad?Sad?It doesn’t seem to be the case, so why does the body react like this?
Finally, Yan Laixi heard himself say: “If you keep doing this, I really don’t want you anymore.”
That’s not quite right, even if you don’t take into account other errors in this sentence, just this “Zai” is not quite right. There is no “Zai” anymore.
Chi Fu just stood there without any reaction.
Also, a stranger suddenly appeared in his home, cried inexplicably, and said something incomprehensible. Being frightened was a common reaction for most normal people when facing this situation. The other was to pick up the phone and call the police. It seemed that he should be glad that Chi Fu was not the other way around.
He ruined Chi Fu’s twenty-fourth birthday after all.
He apologized to Chi Fu. He just apologized without explaining the reason. It was too troublesome to explain, and Yan Laixi was a little tired.Anyway, he should apologize to Chi Fu who remembered him and to Chi Fu who didn’t remember him. As for why he apologized, let Chi Fu fill in the blank himself.
Finally, he said to Chi Fu: “Let’s do this.”
That’s it, I don’t want to be obsessed with the memories between us anymore, and you don’t want to let the lost memories become your burden anymore.
Since continuing this love is endless worry, sadness and hard work, since I can’t let you go immediately, and you can’t let your body forget me yet, then let’s do this.
If I leave you, you don’t have to look for me anymore, waiting for new feelings to appear, covering up this love that is either engraved in unforgettable memories, or engraved in subconscious habits, or just waiting for time to take everything away.
Let’s leave it at that.