Nanke Yifu Chapter 13
bySeeking Chi Fu’s Whereabouts (13)
The first expression Chi Fu showed upon waking up each day changed from surprise to curiosity. Yan Laixi felt like he had truly become a panda in a zoo, constantly being observed. Well, being observed was fine; being a magical creature was better than trespassing.
His phone screen lit up with a notification from the photo studio owner that his pictures were ready for pickup.
Chi Fu hung his diary on the doorknob and taped a note to the door, instructing himself to read the diary before leaving the bedroom after waking up. To prevent himself from sleepwalking out the door, he made sure to lock the door from the inside every night. When he pressed the doorknob in the morning and it wouldn’t budge, he would open his eyes and see the note and the diary. As for Yan Laixi, he had a key and could enter whenever he wished.
Since the diary alone was achieving the desired effect, Yan Laixi had been dragging his feet on the photos. It felt a bit too strange to place his own photos where Chi Fu would see them immediately upon waking. He had originally planned to wait a day, hoping Chi Fu would forget about it and the matter would disappear, but Chi Fu even wrote about wanting the photos in his diary.
He couldn’t put it off any longer. Yan Laixi selected a few photos of them together to avoid any unnecessary trouble. He waited until Chi Fu woke up and his curiosity was satisfied before heading out. The nearest photo studio was closed, so Yan Laixi had to follow the navigation to a more distant one. This studio closed early, and by the time he arrived, the staff were already off work and preparing to leave. Yan Laixi felt awkward asking the owner to reopen the computer and machines, so he exchanged contact information, sent the photos over, and arranged to pick them up another day.
It was only one o’clock in the afternoon. If he went to pick up the photos and came back, Chi Fu should still be asleep. His clothes were in the bedroom, but Yan Laixi’s pajama bottoms were just plain long pants. The only issue with wearing them out was that they were a bit thin for the current weather, though he didn’t particularly care. He casually grabbed a jacket hanging by the door, put it on over his pajamas, took his phone, changed his shoes, and left.
It was late November, nearing the coldest time of the year. Yan Laixi hadn’t walked far before his legs started feeling a little numb from the cold.
Fortunately, there weren’t many clouds blocking the sun today, and he lived in Chaozhi District. If he were in the coldest Xiao Region, even with the sun out, it would probably be a painful freeze by now, although the temperature difference between the districts wasn’t huge.
Yan Laixi didn’t take public transport. He wasn’t in a rush, and since he rarely went out, he wanted to walk around a bit more.
The midday sun should feel warm on the skin. Yan Laixi picked up the photos and bought a few picture frames along the way.
On his way back, a young man caught his eye.
He had taken off his jacket and draped it over his head, likely to block the sun since there was little shade at this hour. He was walking unsteadily close to the trees, looking as if he felt unwell.
Yan Laixi was considering whether to go over and ask if he needed help when the young man stumbled, only managing to stay upright by bracing himself against a nearby tree trunk.
“Are you alright?” Seeing this, Yan Laixi jogged over. The young man glanced at him, opened his mouth as if to say something, but before any sound came out, his chest and abdomen convulsed, and he immediately turned his head to lean on the tree trunk and retch.
Yan Laixi wanted to pat his back, but he didn’t know the young man’s situation and didn’t want to touch him casually. There wasn’t even a small convenience store nearby, and he hadn’t brought anything with him when he left, so he couldn’t even offer the young man some water to settle his stomach. Unsure what to do, he stood awkwardly beside him.
The young man caught his breath and handed Yan Laixi an ID card.
To prepare for emergencies, the ability to display the owner’s Anomaly information by double-clicking the power button was a standard feature on every phone. If someone was too weak to explain, they just needed to show their phone. Yan Laixi didn’t quite understand why he was showing his ID card directly, but he took it anyway.
The young man… no, he was a young adult. He wasn’t tall and had a baby face, making him look younger than he was. In reality, he was only one year younger than Yan Laixi. The young man’s name was Yin Yuqiu, and his Anomaly was the inability to be exposed to sunlight for long periods.
“Can I borrow your phone? Mine ran out of battery,” Yin Yuqiu said, leaning against the tree trunk after steadying his breathing.
“No problem.” Yan Laixi guessed he wanted to call family or a friend. He unlocked his phone and opened the communication app before handing it over. “Let’s hide here for a bit. You’ll catch a cold if you don’t wear a jacket in this weather.”
Yin Yuqiu nodded, then shook his head. He pressed a string of numbers, his eyes widening slightly as if surprised by something. Just as he pressed the call button, another wave of dry heaving hit him.
“I’ll talk.” Yan Laixi took the phone from his hand. After only two beeps, a gentle male voice came through the receiver.
“Hello?”
“Hello,” Yan Laixi replied first. “May I ask if you know Yin Yuqiu? He is currently at…”
He briefly explained the situation. The person on the other end said he would come immediately and asked Yan Laixi to look after Yin Yuqiu temporarily if it was convenient. Then he hung up.
Taking the phone away from his ear, Yan Laixi understood what Yin Yuqiu had been surprised by.
His phone automatically saved and labeled the phone number of everyone he added as a friend. The recent call history showed the name “Shiling.”
Yin Yuqiu, Qiu.
Yan Laixi asked, “You wouldn’t happen to be Qiu Ye, would you?”
Yin Yuqiu nodded, looking at him with confusion.
Yan Laixi opened their chat interface on his phone and showed it to Yin Yuqiu. “I’m Nanke. Let me reintroduce myself. Hello, my name is Yan Laixi.”
Yin Yuqiu probably wanted to introduce himself too, but as soon as he opened his mouth, his chest and abdomen started twitching, and his Adam’s apple bobbed up and down—a clear sign he was about to vomit.
“Don’t talk for now. Sit down and rest.” Yan Laixi tentatively reached out. Seeing that the other person didn’t resist, he helped him sit down under the tree. “Shiling said he’s coming now. Can’t you put your jacket on?”
Yin Yuqiu still shook his head. He held the jacket in front of him, resting the bottom hem on his knees and holding the top end up with his hands, creating a small tent.
“Are you still uncomfortable even in the shade?” Yan Laixi asked.
This time, he nodded.
“Move forward a bit,” Yan Laixi said.
Yin Yuqiu didn’t think much of it and moved forward as instructed. He didn’t react until Yan Laixi started unbuttoning his jacket. When Yan Laixi had already pulled one sleeve off, Yin Yuqiu quickly stopped him. Ignoring the urge to vomit and forgetting about the “tent,” he didn’t care about politeness and immediately reached out, grabbing the collar of Yan Laixi’s half-removed jacket and pulling it back.
This person probably just stepped out quickly, wearing only pajamas underneath, which were even thinner than his own. Was he worried about Yin Yuqiu catching a cold but not himself?
“I’m not cold. You put it on first,” Yan Laixi insisted. Since he was only wearing those thin pants on the bottom, if his legs could manage, his upper body could too.
“You really don’t need to!” A moderate fright is beneficial to the human body in many situations. For example, Yin Yuqiu completely lost the urge to vomit now.
The scene was a bit bizarre: Yan Laixi tugging at his cuff, trying to take off his jacket to give to Yin Yuqiu, and Yin Yuqiu gripping his collar, refusing to let him.
“You can’t do this; you’ll freeze.”
Yin Yuqiu desperately wanted to shout: Look at what you’re wearing underneath! Which one of us is more likely to freeze?!
“I’m much better now,” Yin Yuqiu said, releasing his grip and quickly wrapping himself completely in his jacket, including his head. He leaned against the tree trunk, his voice muffled. “And I can do this. I’m not cold.”
He looked like a giant zongzi (rice dumpling). Yan Laixi chuckled and sat down next to him. “Aren’t you suffocating?”
Yin Yuqiu pulled the fabric open slightly from the side, revealing half of his face. “I’m not suffocating like this.”
“Alright,” Yan Laixi said. “Tell me if you get cold later.”
The giant zongzi extended a finger and pointed at Yan Laixi’s pants, which were obviously thin. “You look colder than I do.”
“I don’t live far from here, and I’ll be back soon. It’s fine,” Yan Laixi said. “But what a coincidence, running into you! Do you and Shiling live in Chaozhi District too?”
Yin Yuqiu shook his head, the tip of the zongzi wobbling. He said, “We’re in Chaoyi District. We came here today for something.”
“I rarely go out, and I almost couldn’t get back,” Yin Yuqiu complained. “I thought winter would be better, so I came out without bringing anything. Who knew the sun would be so strong today?”
“That’s still very close,” Yan Laixi said, placing the bag containing the photos on his lap and hugging it.
“Are those picture frames in there?” Yin Yuqiu asked.
“Yes.” Yan Laixi took one out of the bag. Coincidentally, it held the photo of him and Chi Fu from the first time they ate together.
Chi Fu was less than twenty years old then, still in college, and still called him “Gege.”
Chi Fu had just learned his name then, but Chi Fu remembered him back then.
“Is that Xiao Chi next to you?” Yin Yuqiu asked.
Yan Laixi nodded. Although they had known each other for many years, they had never known each other’s full names while chatting, so Yan Laixi didn’t use Chi Fu’s full name when mentioning him.
“It’s an old photo. That was when I first learned his name.”
“Ah!” Yin Yuqiu suddenly realized. “I remember. You told me about it—the time with the little cat pendant. You even invited him to your place.”
“Yes,” Yan Laixi said. “You still remember something from so long ago?”
“Of course,” Yin Yuqiu said. “Besides Fengxin and Changyu, and maybe Xiaoxiao and Xiaqing, you’re the person I’m most familiar with. Back then, there were many things I couldn’t tell Fengxin, and it wasn’t convenient to tell Xiaoxiao and Xiaqing. I waited every day for you to open your phone and see my messages to help me solve my problems.”
Five years ago, Yan Laixi was preoccupied with finding ways to interact more with Chi Fu, and Qiu Ye was consumed with figuring out how to manage his relationship with Shiling. As soon as they opened their chat box, they would pour out their hearts and offer advice to each other.
“Does Fengxin refer to Shiling?” Yan Laixi asked.
Xiaoxiao and Xiaqing were likely Xiaoyang and Qingzhu. As for Fengxin and Changyu, they must be Shiling.
Yin Yuqiu nodded. “His name is Xu Fengxin, and the other is Xu Changyu.”
“Speaking of which,” Yin Yuqiu lifted the jacket covering his head and scrutinized Yan Laixi. He hadn’t noticed earlier because he felt so ill, but Yan Laixi’s current state was particularly poor. “Your complexion is terrible… Is it because of Xiao Chi?”
“No,” Yan Laixi denied. He had told Qiu Ye about Chi Fu’s Anomaly but hadn’t mentioned his own condition, nor did he want to—it was embarrassing. “I haven’t been sleeping well lately.”
“That’s still because of Xiao Chi.” Yin Yuqiu wrapped his zongzi leaf back around himself and hesitated before speaking. “If there really is no way, why don’t you just leave? Short pain is better than long pain…”
His voice trailed off. Yin Yuqiu didn’t know Chi Fu; this was Yan Laixi’s personal matter, and logically, he had no right to interfere or advise. But seeing Yan Laixi like this, Yin Yuqiu truly couldn’t pretend not to notice.
“Thank you,” Yan Laixi said. “Thank you for thinking of me. I am considering it.”
He murmured, “I promised to celebrate his birthday with him. After his birthday…”
“You could also leave first and then go back on his birthday,” Yin Yuqiu whispered.
Xu Fengxin’s Anomaly wouldn’t make him forget Yin Yuqiu. Yin Yuqiu didn’t know what it felt like to be forgotten by a lover, but he knew it must be awful and not something one could get used to.
In this regard, he admired Yan Laixi. If it were him, he probably would have run away the first time he was forgotten.
Yin Yuqiu grumbled, “It feels like your own child is being bullied, but the other party didn’t mean it, and their apology is so sincere you can’t fault them.”
“What child…” Yan Laixi laughed. “I haven’t been bullied.”
“Yes, you have been bullied,” Yin Yuqiu said, no longer whispering. “He bullies you by making you unable to leave him, forgetting you again and again.”
“He doesn’t want to forget,” Yan Laixi defended Chi Fu. “And he’s not having an easy time of it either.”
“He…”
Yin Yuqiu wanted to say, “No matter what, he forgets everything when he wakes up,” but he realized that saying such a thing would be like stabbing Yan Laixi in the heart. He huffed, “Anyway, if you suddenly decide to leave and don’t have time to apply for a new apartment, come find me. We’re in neighboring districts, so it’s easy to travel back and forth.”
“Okay,” Yan Laixi drew out the end of his reply. “I’ll show up at your door with my bedding roll, begging pitifully for shelter.”
Yin Yuqiu then asked if he was eating properly and rattled off some methods that might help with insomnia. As they talked, a young man with wine-red hair quickly walked toward them, breaking into a run when he saw them.
Yan Laixi patted Yin Yuqiu. “Is that Shiling?”
Yin Yuqiu poked his head out of his jacket. His silver-gray eyes instantly lit up. He waved at the person not far away and didn’t forget to answer Yan Laixi, “That’s him.”
Xu Fengxin ran up to them and stopped, still catching his breath. He immediately crouched down, first covering Yin Yuqiu with a hooded jacket, then turning to thank the person beside him.
Yin Yuqiu saw a scarf in Xu Fengxin’s hand and reached for it.
Xu Fengxin was a little surprised. Yin Yuqiu usually hated wearing scarves, saying they made his neck uncomfortable. He had brought it because he was in a rush and couldn’t find a parasol, thinking he could unfold the scarf and hold it over his head to block the sun.
The next second, he got his answer. Yin Yuqiu unfolded the scarf and placed it over Yan Laixi’s legs.
“Quick, warm up.” His fingers brushed against the fabric inadvertently, and Yin Yuqiu pinched it again in disbelief. It was thinner than he imagined. He suddenly understood how Xu Fengxin felt every time he caught him not wearing thermal underwear in the dead of winter. “These are pajamas, right? Didn’t you change into slightly thicker pants? You came out wearing just this one layer? Do your legs even have feeling left?”
“I just came out to pick up photos. I was too lazy to change. You’re fine now, and Shiling is here, so I’ll be going.” Yan Laixi started to fold the scarf to return it, but Yin Yuqiu pressed his hand down.
“You’re practically an ice pop. This one scarf won’t warm you up, so you really should hurry home.” Yin Yuqiu said. “But take the scarf with you for now. Warming your neck is better than nothing. You can return it next time we meet.”
“How come I didn’t know you were willing to go out for no reason?” Yan Laixi said. Yin Yuqiu was like him—the type of person who would stay home until they died if no one called or forced them out. It was impossible for him to go out just for a scarf. As for meeting up, if that were the reason, they wouldn’t have just found out what each other looked like now. “Next time we meet, it might be years away, right?”
“Then let’s say I’m waiting for you to bring it and seek refuge with me,” Yin Yuqiu said. He noticed Xu Fengxin standing blankly beside them and realized he had forgotten something.
He made a “shush” gesture to Yan Laixi, signaling him not to give a hint, and asked Xu Fengxin, “Guess who he is?”
The person being asked looked blank but quickly realized who it was from the earlier mention of “Shiling” and reached for his phone.
“No cheating!” Yin Yuqiu pretended to snatch his phone, but then handed it back with a chuckle, no longer beating around the bush. “He’s Nanke. How about that? Isn’t it a huge coincidence?”
The two exchanged brief greetings. Yin Yuqiu touched Yan Laixi’s icy cold pant leg and urged him to hurry home.
Their routes home overlapped for a short distance, separating at the next intersection. Before parting, Yin Yuqiu didn’t forget to remind Yan Laixi again to “cut your losses in time,” stating that he was welcome to stay with him anytime, and if he didn’t want to stay but just needed help with something, that was fine too.
After walking about ten meters, Yan Laixi turned back, watching the two figures gradually walk away.
Even though Qiu Ye and Shiling had known each other much longer than he and Chi Fu, Yan Laixi felt that he and Qiu Ye had fallen into their respective loves almost simultaneously.
They floated in two different rivers, once anxious about their stillness, and later unsure how to react to their turbulence.
They both achieved the outcome they desired, or at least they had.
But now, his river was suddenly threatening to drown him.
Perhaps letting it dry up was the right choice.
Yan Laixi clutched the bag containing the photos, telling himself: just this last month or so. After celebrating Chi Fu’s birthday, he would do as Yin Yuqiu suggested—short pain is better than long pain. Continuing like this was meaningless, serving only to make himself miserable and hold Chi Fu back. Rather than tormenting each other, it was better to let go. Time would take Chi Fu’s memory, and it would surely heal the wounds deep in his heart.