WMSG Chapter 78
by VolareYe Yueshen slightly turned his head, otherwise, his breath would be on Gong Xunwu’s neck.
Gong Xunwu remained silent, but the immense pressure forced Ye Yueshen to say, “I never wanted it. You kept forcing it on me. I clearly let it go. I only noticed the jade pendant was still on me after I left your side. I can’t help it.”
“There is a way.” Gong Xunwu lowered his head, his lips seemingly brushing against Ye Yueshen’s forehead and cheek, “You don’t leave my side.”
Ye Yueshen took a step back, looked at the tavern he had stayed in for several days, and then asked, “I can’t stay here anymore either, can I?”
“I never chased you away.” Gong Xunwu’s eyes were hurt, but he couldn’t suppress his anger. He looked at Ye Yueshen with a gloomy expression, “If you want me to stay, I’ve always…”
“I don’t want to.” Ye Yueshen’s answer was resolute.
Gong Xunwu watched Ye Yueshen leave. He took two steps to chase after him but stopped, watching his back disappear.
When Ye Yueshen returned, Ye He was roasting sweet potatoes in the stove. He squatted down, picked up a fire poker, and helped Ye He turn the sweet potatoes. After they were roasted, Ye He dug them out of the ashes.
Ye Yueshen didn’t want to eat. He had no appetite at all.
He said it was too hot and he would eat later, then lay on the kang, his eyelids drooping. He fell asleep before long.
Ye He lit the stove again to keep warm. After making sure the sweet potatoes were at a suitable temperature to eat, he went over to call Ye Yueshen. Just as he was about to speak, he noticed Ye Yueshen was crying in his sleep.
Ye Yueshen was sobbing, and Ye He assumed something sad had happened to him, or that he had been harassed because of his appearance. He was about to comfort him when he realized Ye Yueshen was dreaming, his head slightly turning from side to side, making small noises.
Ye He listened carefully for a while and discovered Ye Yueshen was saying, “Don’t want me… nobody wants me… back to the past again…”
Ye He reached out to test Ye Yueshen’s forehead and was shocked by the heat. He quickly tucked Ye Yueshen in and ran out to find a doctor.
Gong Xunwu arrived at this moment. He had been hesitating outside the door, but when he suddenly saw Ye He running out in a hurry, he sensed something was wrong and quickly went inside to check.
Ye Yueshen’s eyes were already red from crying, and tears flowed from the corners of his eyes into his hair. Gong Xunwu sat by the bed, gently scooped him up, placed him on his lap, and wiped away his tears.
He glanced outside, and Sha Ou quickly came in to ask what he wanted. Gong Xunwu picked up Ye Yueshen, “Send for the Imperial Physician.”
After Sha Ou left, Gong Xunwu also wanted to take Ye Yueshen away. The room here was small and dark, barely considered clean. Moreover, there were two quilts on one bed, clearly indicating Ye Yueshen shared a room with the man in his twenties.
How could Ye Yueshen share a room with someone else? Ye Yueshen was so beautiful, how could those people have the nerve to share a bed with him?
Gong Xunwu frowned and tightened his grip on Ye Yueshen. Ye Yueshen opened his eyes and realized he was being moved and that Gong Xunwu was carrying him.
Ye Yueshen reached out and grabbed the doorframe tightly. Gong Xunwu stopped and looked over, “Let go. You have a fever, you need to take medicine.”
Ye Yueshen didn’t let go, “Put me down, I’m not going with you.”
“Be good.” Gong Xunwu lowered his head to kiss him, but ultimately didn’t. He repeated, “Be good, come with me first.”
Ye Yueshen shook his head, “I’m not going.” He was very weak right now, and after thinking about it, he said, “I’m not going outside, it’s cold. I’ll get worse if I catch a draft.”
As expected, Gong Xunwu quickly put him back on the bed and closed the doors and windows tightly. Then, he went to the side and threw handfuls of firewood into the stove.
Perhaps due to the emotional rollercoaster, Ye Yueshen’s illness came on quickly. From fever to unconsciousness, it only took an hour. Gong Xunwu held the silent Ye Yueshen, his heart filled with anxiety.
Ye Yueshen felt soft and sweet in his arms. Gong Xunwu held him tightly, repeatedly testing his forehead temperature with his brow and anxiously probing his nose for breath.
Fortunately, Ye Yueshen was only sick. The Imperial Physician arrived before the local doctor, applied acupuncture to Ye Yueshen, and pressed a pill under Ye Yueshen’s tongue.
Before long, Ye Yueshen frowned and woke up, trying to turn his head to spit out the bad-tasting medicine. Gong Xunwu stopped him in time, “Don’t move, there are needles.”
Ye Yueshen’s eyes were glazed over. He stared blankly at the strangers in the room for a while, then couldn’t help but open his mouth, using his tongue to push the pill out.
Gong Xunwu caught it with a quick hand, preventing the pill from falling into his neck. Ye Yueshen coughed a few times, and Gong Xunwu fed him the candied fruit that Sha Ou had just bought.
Ye Yueshen frowned and spat it out again. Halfway through, he realized it was sweet and sour. He chewed it a few times, ate it, and then, dazed, opened his mouth again, waiting to be fed.
Gong Xunwu’s heart felt like it was being pinched. He quickly put another candied fruit in his mouth. Ye Yueshen closed his eyes, his cheek muscles moving slightly as he chewed, swallowed, and then opened his mouth again.
The Imperial Physician next to him couldn’t help but say, “It’s better to eat less, I’m afraid it will counteract the medicine.”
So Gong Xunwu lowered his head and kissed Ye Yueshen’s lips. Ye Yueshen waited for a while but didn’t get any candied fruit. He made a small hum and then started struggling again.
The Imperial Physician quickly removed the needles, and Ye Yueshen fell asleep in Gong Xunwu’s arms.
Ye He also returned with the doctor, but was stopped at the door and carefully asked, “Who are you? What have you done to my brother?”
Gong Xunwu heard the term “brother” and looked up, saying to Sha Ou, “Let the doctor leave, let him in.”
So Sha Ou gave money to send the doctor away, and Ye He walked in. He saw Ye Yueshen being held in someone’s arms, his shoulder exposed, looking like he had just been given acupuncture.
Gong Xunwu sized him up, feeling that his appearance was not as good as Ruo Ya or Liu Qingying, but his eyes were round and bright, a bit like Ruo Ya. It seemed Ye Yueshen liked this kind of appearance and personality.
Gong Xunwu looked at him coldly, “If you have nothing to do, go sleep under the bridge tonight. I’ll stay and take care of him.” Then he gave Sha Ou a look.
Sha Ou handed over a heavy silver ingot, speaking more politely, “This young friend, why not spend the night at an inn?”
Ye He refused to leave. Sha Ou kindly persuaded him out. Ye He hesitated for a while in the courtyard. Fortunately, the courtyard had two rooms, so he went to the other room.
If something happened next door, he would hear it and be able to stop it in time.
Gong Xunwu held Ye Yueshen like he was holding a lost treasure that had been found again, gently touching Ye Yueshen’s cheek, lowering his head to peck a kiss, and then very restrainedly sniffing him.
Until he vaguely heard Ye Yueshen talking in his sleep, “Nobody wants me…”
Gong Xunwu felt a sense of weightlessness, as if falling into an abyss, infected by Ye Yueshen’s insecurity. He felt ashamed that he had not controlled Ye Lingshen’s mouth.
The next day, Ye Yueshen improved. He woke up and was able to sit up and eat breakfast. Gong Xunwu took out the food from the food box, watching him finish eating before leaving.
These days, everyone in the court was busy. Ye Yuanshen had also been staying in the palace for two days. Sometimes he would go home for a quick bath and change of clothes, eat a few bites, and then return to the palace to discuss matters with the cabinet.
Ye Yueshen could sense that the war was intensifying, but he didn’t have the strength to think too much.
During the day, he felt pretty good and his fever had gone down. While Ye He was cleaning up the dishes, he noticed Ye Yueshen was starting the stove.
Ye He quickly grabbed the fire starter and told him to rest. Ye Yueshen sat on a wooden chair in a daze. Before long, someone knocked on the door.
Ye Yueshen thought Gong Xunwu had returned, but it turned out to be Liu Qingying.
Liu Qingying wore a dark brown cloak, and his hair was disheveled by the wind. He quickly walked in, grabbed Ye Yueshen’s hand, and started crying before he could even speak.
Ye Yueshen patted his hand soothingly and used his other hand to wipe away his tears, softly asking, “What’s wrong?”
As Ye Yueshen had guessed, Liu Qingying sobbed, “My father was seriously injured in Mangzhou, and my brother is missing in Youzhou. What should I do, Zherong… It’s all my fault. I should have listened to you, but I couldn’t save my father and brother…”
Ye Yueshen lowered his eyes and sighed. After a moment, he gently embraced Liu Qingying and patted his back, “The Fifth Prince should have connections in Mangzhou. You can go to the palace and ask the Fifth Prince to send a message on the war report carriage to bring your father back. There are many Imperial Physicians and doctors in the capital. Your father will definitely recover.”
Liu Qingying held Ye Yueshen and cried incessantly, “Zherong, it’s all my fault…”
He was almost wailing, tightening his grip on Ye Yueshen, the feeling of regret almost overwhelming him.
“Qingying, Qingying…” Ye Yueshen patted his back, coughing from the tight grip, and then forcefully broke free.
Ye Yueshen cupped his face and said very seriously, “Don’t torture yourself over a point of no return, and don’t imagine the other path at the fork in the road to be too good. The divergences in life may not be a permanent divergence, maybe it’s a constant entanglement. Fate will push you back to that original path, and our power is not enough to resist. This is not your personal fault.”
Liu Qingying stopped crying blankly, Ye Yueshen’s soft voice echoing in his ears: This is not your personal fault.
Liu Qingying finally wasn’t so emotional. He began to sob softly, and Ye Yueshen also felt heartache. He hugged Liu Qingying, patiently accepting his emotions.
As a reader, he had a lot of feelings of frustration with Liu Qingying, the protagonist, but being truly in this world, he himself wasn’t that much smarter, so he couldn’t treat Liu Qingying as a pre-set character.
He saw Liu Qingying’s inferiority and entanglement, saw his pain of being ignored by his beloved, and the jealousy and unwillingness of chasing after another person in front of him.
Ye Yueshen would think of the unsatisfactory self of the past, and he couldn’t help but empathize.
Compared to the princes who played with power and competed for benefits, those things that would leave a mark in history didn’t have much of a feeling. On the contrary, the small, ordinary people who wouldn’t be mentioned vividly and strongly broke into Ye Yueshen’s observing eyes.
Liu Qingying cried for a long time before finally calming down. He lay on Ye Yueshen’s shoulder without speaking. In fact, he looked a little taller and stronger than Ye Yueshen, but now Ye Yueshen had become his spiritual pillar.
Ye Yueshen didn’t urge him, waiting for him to sort out his emotions.
After a long time, Liu Qingying finally looked up, but his eyes were still tangled and timid. He asked softly, “Zherong, can you, can you accompany me to the Fifth Prince’s residence to beg him? You, you just have to accompany me.”