When The Snow Falls In Autumn Chapter 70

Chapter 70

The rain kept falling with no intention of stopping.Dense raindrops pounded against the tall glass windows of the library, making a persistent, disturbing pattering sound.The sky has long been dark, and the world outside the window is only filled with blurred water and some dim lights that are diluted by the rain.

The people in the library have almost left, and there are only a few people left in the empty reading area, submerged in the shadows cast by the tall bookshelves.The incandescent lamp overhead emits a uniform and cold light, illuminating the slowly floating dust in the air.

Ye Qiulan was sitting in the same seat, with the professional book spread out in front of him having not turned a page for a long time.Her eyes fell on the empty chair opposite, and her fingertips unconsciously traced a tiny gap on the edge of the page.When we parted at the school gate in the afternoon, Ling Xueqing’s soaked back and pale face were as hot as a soldering iron in my mind.The residual warmth of the cup of ginger tea seemed to still remain in the palm of the hand, and what was even more distinct was the soft and hot touch that the fingertips instantly touched – the temperature of Ling Xueqing’s lips.

The feeling flustered her and made her restless all afternoon.I didn’t even eat dinner, so I came to the library again by accident and sat down at this table.It seems that by sitting here, I can get closer to that person and sort out the increasingly tangled threads in my heart.

But no.As time passed, the restlessness in my heart not only did not subside, but became clearer and sharper with the endless sound of rain outside the window.She thought of Ling Xueqing’s slightly trembling arms on the bus, the shadows cast by her thick eyelashes when she closed her eyes tightly, the red color of her ears that quickly spread when she held the candy in her mouth, and the last words of “thank you” and “very important” that were diluted by the sound of rain.

“Very important”.Is it for the clues, or for…her?

As soon as the idea came up, she pressed it down hard.However, his cheeks were getting hot uncontrollably.Can’t think about it anymore.She forced herself to focus on the page, but the black characters were squirming like little bugs, unable to enter her mind at all.

Just when she was upset and almost got up to leave, a familiar, slightly hasty footsteps came from far away and stopped at the table.

Ye Qiulan raised his head.

Ling Xueqing stood there.She changed out of her soaked down jacket and wore a dark green loose sweater, with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows, revealing her clear forearms.The hair seemed to have been brushed in a hurry and not completely dry. A few strands of wet hair were stuck to the smooth forehead and side of the neck.Her face looked worse than it had in the afternoon, an unhealthy pallor, and her lips had lost their color and were pursed tightly.Only those eyes, under the cold white light of the library, looked particularly deep, as if some suppressed and indistinct emotions were surging inside.

She didn’t hold a book in her hand, only the dark blue thermos cup.

“Why…are you here?” Ye Qiulan heard that his voice was a little dry, and his heart beat faster uncontrollably.

Ling Xueqing did not answer immediately.She pulled out the chair opposite, sat down, and placed the thermos cup on the table.His movements were a little slow, with a heavy feeling of exhaustion.She lowered her eyes and focused on the wood grain of the table, her fingers unconsciously picking at the edge of the thermos cup lid.

“Can’t sleep.” After a few seconds, she whispered, her voice a little hoarse, “The dormitory… is too quiet.”

The rain pounded on the windows, and the library was empty and silent.Her words were like a pebble thrown into the silence, creating tiny ripples.

Ye Qiulan didn’t know how to answer the call.She looked at Ling Xueqing’s lowered eyebrows and the abnormal flush on her pale cheeks, and the worry resurfaced in her heart.”You…have a cold? It rained this afternoon.”

Ling Xueqing shook her head almost imperceptibly and raised her eyes to look at Ye Qiulan.Her eyes were a little vacant and a little stubborn.”That clue, ‘Lengxiang Stream’.” She suddenly mentioned this, speaking a little faster than usual, “I went back and checked several local chronicles of Yongzhou in the Qing Dynasty, but there was no direct record. However, in the “Illustrated Notes of Yongzhou Prefecture” written in the reign of Guangxu, a small, unnamed river tributary symbol was marked on a mountainous area in the west of the state near the source of Guixi River, with the word ‘jian’ written in very small characters next to it.”

She took out a folded note from her sweater pocket, spread it out, and pushed it in front of Ye Qiulan.Above is the simple terrain she temporarily copied with a very fine pen, as well as the inconspicuous symbols and notes.

“The location roughly matches.” Ling Xueqing pointed her fingers on the note paper, her fingertips trembling slightly. “If ‘Lengxiang Stream’ really exists, it is probably in that area. But the specific location requires a more detailed map, or… to see it on the spot.”

There was an almost paranoid concentration in her tone, as if her whole body was tied to this elusive clue.But Ye Qiulan saw that when she was holding the pen and copying, her fingertips were so hard that they turned white. He saw the tiredness in her eyes that was so thick that it couldn’t be removed, and the faint and abnormal blush under her pale face.

“Senior Sister Ling,” Ye Qiulan interrupted her, speaking softly unconsciously, “You look really bad. Do you want… to go to the campus hospital for a checkup first? Or go back and rest?”

Ling Xueqing’s words stopped abruptly.She looked at Ye Qiulan, and the thin layer of concentrated ice in her eyes seemed to have cracked, revealing a deeper, almost fragile confusion underneath.She twitched the corners of her mouth, as if she wanted to make an expression that showed no problem, but failed.

“It’s okay.” She repeated, her voice even hoarse, “I’m just a little tired.”

After saying that, she suddenly started coughing.It wasn’t a loud cough, but a suppressed, low cough that was stuck in the chest, and the shoulders were slightly raised with the cough.She quickly turned her face sideways, put the back of her hand against her lips, trying to suppress the cough, and curved her neck tightly.

Ye Qiulan’s heart suddenly tightened.She stood up almost immediately, walked around the table and walked to Ling Xueqing.”You have a fever.” This is not a question, but an affirmation.She reached out her hand and wanted to touch Ling Xueqing’s forehead, but her fingertips paused hesitantly when she was about to touch it.

At that moment, Ling Xueqing raised her other hand and grabbed Ye Qiulan’s wrist that was hanging in the air.

The palm of her hand was very hot, the temperature was astonishingly high, and she held Ye Qiulan’s slightly cold wrist tightly, with a bit of uncontrollable strength.The hot touch made Ye Qiulan tremble all over.

The coughing stopped temporarily.Ling Xueqing raised her head, her eyes were slightly red due to coughing, and her eyes were covered with a layer of physiological moisture. Her gaze towards Ye Qiulan was a little distracted, but also with a strange, almost stubborn clarity.

“Ye Qiulan,” she called her name, her voice hoarse, and every word seemed to be squeezed out of her burning throat, “Why?”

Ye Qiulan was stunned, his wrist was held by the hot hand and he couldn’t move.”What…why?”

“Why do you stay every time?” Ling Xueqing stared at her, as if his eyes were piercing into the depths of her soul, “Why do you accompany me to the archives? Why do you help me copy those boring things? Why…” She paused, breathing a little quickly, “Why are you still there when I… look ugly?”

She asked questions one after another, quickly and urgently, completely unlike the usual Ling Xueqing.That shell of calmness and restraint seemed to have suffered serious cracks under the sudden attack of high fever and exhaustion.

Ye Qiulan was caught off guard by the question, his cheeks burned fiercely, and the heat on his wrists spread all the way to his heart, causing a panicky throbbing.”I…I didn’t…” She was incoherent and didn’t know how to answer.Could it be said that it is because of worry?Because you feel distressed?Because… those feelings that she didn’t even dare to delve into?

“I don’t need sympathy.” Ling Xueqing interrupted her, her tone suddenly turned cold, as if she was using her last strength to build a defense.She let go of her hand, turned her face away, and looked out the window again at the endless rainy night, leaving only Ye Qiulan’s tight silhouette.”I will handle my own affairs. Those clues, whether they lead to results or not, are all my own business. You don’t need to…waste your time.”

These words were like ice picks, stinging Ye Qiulan.It wasn’t because of the alienation in the words, but because she could hear the deep loneliness beneath the coldness and unwillingness to drag others down, and a trace of fear of being seen as vulnerable that perhaps even Ling Xueqing herself wasn’t aware of.

“It’s not sympathy.” Ye Qiulan heard his own voice, although it was trembling, it was extremely clear.She took a step forward and stood in front of Ling Xueqing, blocking her view of the window.”It’s not a waste of time.”

Ling Xueqing was forced to raise her head to look at her. The red bloodshot eyes were clearly visible under the light, and the layer of moisture seemed to be heavier.

“I just…” Ye Qiulan took a deep breath, mustered up the greatest courage in his life, and looked directly into those eyes that were always deep and difficult to understand, “I want to be by your side.”

The air seemed to freeze.The sound of rain, the faint sound of footsteps in the distance, the buzz of the light tube overhead, everything receded far away.Only the small space between the two people was silently confronting each other, filled with hot and chaotic emotions.

Ling Xueqing looked at her blankly, as if he didn’t understand her words, and seemed to be severely hit by these words.There was no expression on her pale face, only the layer of moisture under her eyes quickly gathered, and then, without warning, a tear slipped from the corner of her eye and rolled down her cheek, leaving a clear wet mark.

She didn’t move or make any sound, she just opened her eyes and let the tears fall.Then came the second drop, the third drop…tears welled up silently, sliding down her feverishly red cheeks.

Ye Qiulan was completely panicked.She had never seen Ling Xueqing cry, and she couldn’t even imagine Ling Xueqing crying.Ling Xueqing, who was always calm, restrained, and carried everything on her own, was crying silently in front of her like a lost child.

“Senior Sister Ling…” Ye Qiulan was at a loss. He wanted to reach out and wipe it, but he didn’t dare to touch her.

Ling Xueqing suddenly raised her hand and wiped her eyes harshly with the back of her hand.She lowered her head and said in a muffled voice with a thick nasal sound and a choked sob she tried to suppress: “Don’t look at me.”

These three words made Ye Qiulan’s heartache more than any crying.She no longer hesitated, stretched out her hand, and gently held the hand that Ling Xueqing was wiping tears from.The palms of my hands were still hot and trembling slightly.

Ling Xueqing’s body stiffened for a moment, but she didn’t break free.

“I saw it.” Ye Qiulan said softly, clenching the hot hand, “I saw it a long time ago.”

See her loneliness, her tenacity, the weight she carries, the fragility she carefully protects, and the desolate land under her cold shell that longs for warmth.

Ling Xueqing’s shoulders trembled almost imperceptibly.She still lowered her head, and held the hem of her sweater tightly with her other hand, her knuckles turning white from the force.More tears fell on the back of her own hands, spreading dark marks.

“I can’t control it well…” She choked and said intermittently, her voice was so broken that she couldn’t control pheromones…emotions…I couldn’t control anything…I’m very bad…”

“You’re not bad.” Ye Qiulan interrupted her, his tone firmer than ever.She squatted down so that she could look straight at Ling Xueqing, who had her head lowered. With her other hand, she gently and carefully brushed away the wet hair that was stuck with tears from her forehead.”You’re just…too tired.”

Ling Xueqing finally raised her head and looked at Ye Qiulan who was close at hand with blurred eyes.Those eyes, always calm and deep, were now washed clear by tears, filled with fragility, confusion, and a glimmer of disbelief that had nowhere to put them.

“Ye Qiulan,” she murmured, calling her name again, as if to confirm something, “I… I don’t know what to do.”

She didn’t know how to deal with this surging, unfamiliar sense of dependence, how to respond to this straightforward and gentle “seeing”, and how to get along with another person after removing all defenses.

“No need to do anything.” Ye Qiulan looked into her eyes, and the turbulent sea in his heart strangely calmed down at this moment, leaving only boundless softness and care.”Just like this, that’s fine.”

Ling Xueqing stared at her blankly, tears still flowing, but the thick ice shell in her eyes was melting and breaking at a speed visible to the naked eye.She held Ye Qiulan’s hand with her backhand. Her fingertips were cold, but she held them tightly, like grabbing the only driftwood when drowning.

The two of them just looked at each other, in the empty and silent corner of the library, amidst the never-ending sound of rain outside the window.Time has lost its meaning.

After an unknown amount of time, Ling Xueqing’s tears gradually stopped, leaving only tiny water droplets on her eyelashes and wet tear stains on her cheeks.The high fever made her consciousness a little dizzy. She leaned back on the chair and closed her eyes slightly, but did not let go of Ye Qiulan’s hand.

“Lengxiangjian…” She suddenly murmured in a low voice, as if she was talking in her sleep, “I want… to take you to have a look. When I find it… when the weather is good…”

“Okay.” Ye Qiulan responded without hesitation.She was still squatting, looking up at Ling Xueqing’s tired sleeping face, and gently wiped away the remaining tears on her cheeks with her fingertips.

Ling Xueqing seemed to make a slight “hmm” sound, and her breathing gradually became longer.She fell asleep, her brows still slightly furrowed, but her grip on Ye Qiulan’s hand relaxed a little, but she still didn’t let go.

Ye Qiulan remained in this posture, motionless.Her hot body temperature could be felt on his wrist, and the shape of her knuckles could be felt in his palm.The sound of rain outside the window seemed to become quieter, turning into a soft patter in the background.

The light shines on the two people, casting their figures on the ground, overlapping each other, blurring the boundaries.

Ye Qiulan looked at Ling Xueqing’s brows and eyes that still looked uneasy in his sleep, and the feeling that had been heavy and nowhere to be found in his heart for a long time suddenly found a place to rest.Not relief, not relaxation, but another heavier and more real weight – about commitment, about companionship, about the long and possibly still difficult road ahead.

But she no longer felt hesitant.

She adjusted her posture slightly to allow Ling Xuequing to lean more comfortably, then lowered her head and gently pressed her forehead against the hands held by the two of them.

The temperature came from the skin next to each other, hot and real.

The library’s closing bell rang after a long time.It’s far away, but it no longer disturbs the tranquility of this corner.

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