What’S Wrong With Just Eating His Majesty’S Soft Rice? Chapter 4

Chapter 4: He Must Have Been Mentally Ill for Several Years Now

Fang Cheng was rendered speechless by his laughter, and he wasn’t even sleepy anymore. It is just a movie, what kind of sorcery could it be? Why don’t you just stick a talisman on the TV?

Zhou Yinli also sensed that the other man didn’t want to answer him. Realizing he had asked a stupid question, he pursed his lips and fell silent.

Fang Cheng rubbed his own hair. When he had looked in the mirror earlier and saw that patch of hair that had been sliced flat, he had cursed Zhou Yinli to high heaven in his heart. But at the thought of being able to make money, none of it mattered anymore.

Fang Cheng took another careful look at Zhou Yinli. This guy’s face was truly beyond reproach. Strangely, even though he was staring at the television with a serious expression, his face was growing increasingly tense. It gave Fang Cheng an inexplicable feeling: he was in a state of panic and fear.

Could he be moved by the scene? Perhaps because he and his beloved rich girlfriend were torn apart by his mother, he suffered a great shock and became the mental patient he was now?

Fang Cheng walked over to him and waved a hand. Your Majesty, what is wrong? If the TV isn’t good, then stop watching it for now. Go take a shower. I brought a set of clothes for you to wear; you better not wear that outfit when you go out.

Fang Cheng looked closely at his clothes again. The workmanship was quite good, much more exquisite than the chaotic studio-style Hanfu seen outside these days. He didn’t know where the man had gotten them.

This outfit didn’t look cheap either. It suggested this mental patient had a family and the money to set him up with this cosplay.

Oh right, what if the family came looking for him? Fang Cheng asked tentatively, Your Majesty, where is your phone? Your ID card? Are they on you?

Zhou Yinli was still in a daze. What is… a phone…

Fang Cheng rolled his eyes and pulled out his own. This. Call your family.

Zhou Yinli glanced at his phone, a small black block. He didn’t know what it was.

Zhen does not have this ‘phone’ you speak of.

Not even a phone?

What other relatives do you have in your family? Do you have a contact number?

Zhou Yinli thought for a moment, not knowing what a contact number was, and shook his head. There are still some relatives, but Zhen does not know how to find them. What is a contact number?

Fang Cheng looked him over and realized there really was no place on this man to carry a phone.

Although one had to take a mental patient’s words with a grain of salt, since he had no phone, his family probably wouldn’t come looking for him in the short term. It shouldn’t be a problem to take this guy to film for a bit.

He leaned in with a chuckle. So, Your Majesty, what are your plans? Are you going to keep sponging off me at my house?

Zhou Yinli said in a low voice, Zhen only wishes to return to the palace.

I will definitely help you go back. Fang Cheng patted his chest in guarantee, smiling broadly.

This confident appearance made Zhou Yinli pause for a moment. Seeing Fang Cheng’s smiling face, he felt slightly better, but he quickly regained the arrogance befitting an emperor. Do you know how Zhen should return to the palace?

Fang Cheng laughed. Of course. The people in your palace dress differently from us.

Zhou Yinli nodded. Indeed.

Fang Cheng continued, And the people there are all especially respectful to you, right? They all call you Your Majesty, and some even kneel to you.

Zhou Yinli felt he was stating the obvious. It should be so. Zhen is the Emperor.

Fang Cheng chuckled. Then that is it! We are talking about the same place. You want to go back to the palace, right? I know how to get back.

Fang Cheng was certain that the “palace” he spoke of was the mental hospital. In a hospital, people wore either white coats or patient gowns; the people there definitely dressed differently from those outside.

And since he claimed to be the emperor, the other mental patients around him surely believed he was the emperor. It was normal for them to be respectful. The doctors and nurses probably played along with his performance too.

To this mental patient, it wasn’t strange for a mental hospital to equal an imperial palace.

Fang Cheng had it all planned out. He would take him to film first, and once the money was in hand, he would take him to the police station. They would surely be able to find his home or his mental hospital.

One thing at a time. Zhou Yinli would help him earn this money, and his grudge with this guy would be settled; he would let the hair incident slide.

Furthermore, he was kindly helping this person return to his rightful mental hospital, which was also a good deed to accumulate merit.

Fang Cheng didn’t mention the words “mental hospital” to him, instead following his lead by calling it the “palace,” fearing he might provoke or trigger him.

You know how to send Zhen back to the palace? Do you also know sorcery? Zhou Yinli was very suspicious. Fang Cheng did not look like any kind of Taoist priest.

Fang Cheng’s face darkened. Don’t worry, I have a way. I will definitely send you back when the time comes. But I won’t send you back for nothing. There must be an exchange of conditions.

Zhou Yinli had an excellent memory. Is it what you said before, helping you act out a scene?

Fang Cheng immediately gave a thumbs up. Your Majesty, you are truly brilliant. That is the condition. It won’t take much of your time; it is very easy.

Zhou Yinli fell silent. Zhen can consider it.

Fang Cheng was in a good mood and said meaningfully, Your Majesty, I don’t know how you ended up here, but people here don’t care for emperors or crown princes. If you insist on saying you are the emperor and making people kneel to you, someone will call the police to arrest you immediately. When that happens, no one will care if you are the emperor or not.

Zhou Yinli’s expression changed slightly. Naturally, Zhen will conceal my identity.

Fang Cheng was happy now. Then you must remember your status. A gentleman’s word is his bond. In front of outsiders, never say you are the emperor, and don’t lay a hand on anyone. And you definitely cannot draw your sword.

Zhou Yinli gave a cold snort. Zhen will naturally not break my word.

Fang Cheng chuckled. You need to change out of these things that expose your identity and hide them. Just carrying a sword on the street will get you arrested. As he spoke, his eyes drifted toward the sword in Zhou Yinli’s hand.

Zhou Yinli gripped the sword. He had long seen that Fang Cheng was very wary of his sword. It was just that Fang Cheng didn’t know that even without this sword, he would be no match for him. After thinking it over, he tossed the sword toward Fang Cheng.

Fang Cheng instinctively caught it with his hands. The sword was heavier than he imagined, and he almost failed to hold it. He coughed twice to hide the embarrassment of nearly dropping it and the relief in his heart at having gained Zhou Yinli’s trust.

Once the weapon was in his hands, he felt much safer. Now that Zhou Yinli’s threat was weakened and they were both empty-handed, he wasn’t afraid. His voice immediately became much firmer, and his back straightened.

Go take a shower and change your clothes first. Isn’t it uncomfortable wearing that outfit? Fang Cheng began to direct him.

Zhou Yinli also frowned and stood up. He nodded slightly and walked in the direction Fang Cheng pointed.

Fang Cheng thought for a moment and called out to him again, Hey, wait. He went to the wardrobe, found some of his old clothes, and handed them to Zhou Yinli. Seeing that the man’s build was similar to his own, they should fit.

Zhou Yinli took the clothes handed to him and entered the bedroom.

It was quiet inside.

Fang Cheng figured a mental patient shouldn’t be so far gone that he didn’t know how to shower, so he lay outside contentedly and scrolled through his phone for a while. When he looked up, he saw Zhou Yinli’s sword. He was curious and reached out to touch it. The metal was cold, and there were different colored gemstones on the hilt. The scabbard also looked very high-quality.

He stared at the thing, still feeling a bit apprehensive in his heart. This sword was much sharper than he had imagined; it was very dangerous to have as a weapon.

Only a mental patient like Zhou Yinli would run around the streets with it and draw it to slash at people.

Fang Cheng carefully drew the blade out, seeing a sliver of cold light. His ears even seemed to hallucinate a faint, ringing hum.

It scared him into letting go, and he quickly shoved the sword back in.

What was he trying to do, carrying something so sharp? This wasn’t some ten-yuan sword from a temple fair; this thing looked like the real deal.

In his heart, he cursed Zhou Yinli’s ancestors for eighteen generations all over again.

After thinking it over, this thing was still dangerous and couldn’t be left where Zhou Yinli could touch it. If he went crazy again, Fang Cheng wouldn’t be able to stop him.

He held the sword, looking left and right in the living room. Finally, he decided to put it in a cabinet and used tape to secure it to the top inner surface. This way, unless someone reached up to feel the top of the cabinet, they wouldn’t find the thing even if they opened the door.

Fang Cheng let out a bright smile at his flash of wisdom.

It was just that the sword was too heavy. Taping it up consumed a lot of tape. Fang Cheng used up an entire roll before the thing was firmly stuck.

By the time he finished dealing with the sword, a lot of time had passed. Only then did he notice there was still no sound from the bathroom. He didn’t know what the man was doing in there. Thinking the guy might not be able to find things, he gave a kind reminder.

So he shouted toward the inside, Cold water on the left, hot water on the right. The shampoo and body wash are in one bottle next to you. The towel on the washing machine is new.

After he finished shouting, there was a pause inside, and finally, the sound of water appeared.

Fang Cheng breathed a sigh of relief. He had thought the man was a complete idiot, but it turned out he knew how to shower. As long as he knew how to shower, he wasn’t a total fool. Otherwise, it would be a huge trouble; he couldn’t possibly serve someone who couldn’t take care of themselves.

Those few thousand yuan wouldn’t be enough for that kind of effort.

Having been on the move all day, Fang Cheng could hardly keep his eyes open now and yawned uncontrollably. The plot of the movie had reached the part where the couple got married. Fang Cheng felt this kind of ending wasn’t even worth watching. So he changed the channel to the late-night news.

He waited a long time before he heard the sound of Zhou Yinli opening the door and coming out.

Seeing that the sword was right under his nose, Fang Cheng’s courage became very great. He said sarcastically, Your Majesty, I thought you might have washed yourself away in the shower.

Zhou Yinli said nothing. He had studied the things in there for a long time before figuring them out.

Finding that anything he said would be mocked by Fang Cheng, he decided it was better to say less. He was completely unfamiliar with this world and could only protect himself for the time being.

Because the other man didn’t answer, Fang Cheng was about to say something more, but when he looked up and saw Zhou Yinli wearing his clothes, he almost didn’t recognize him.

In short, the change was quite significant. He had instantly transformed from a handsome man in ancient dress to a handsome man in a poor loser’s outfit. However, that grumpy, handsome face hadn’t changed at all.

Fang Cheng saw that the size of the clothes was suitable. He didn’t know what this mental patient had grown up eating, but now he could see that the man had an excellent physique. Beneath the yellowed white undershirt, one could vaguely see a lean, long, and quite powerful frame. No wonder his movements were so agile; his strength was likely not small either.

After feeling sour about the man’s physique, Fang Cheng quickly noticed his long hair was draped wet behind him. Besides soaking the back of his clothes, it was also dripping quite a bit of water onto the floor.

Isn’t there a hairdryer? Why didn’t you use it? Fang Cheng stared at the water droplets on the floor, feeling very annoyed. He had just cleaned up. Sure enough, having an outsider at home was a hassle. If he really stayed for several days, it would be infuriating.

How many days would that bit of money cover? If he couldn’t finish filming at Lin Er’s place, would he end up losing out?

In the next second, he realized that this guy’s long hair was actually real, not a wig.

Moreover, looking at this length, he must have been a mental patient for several years now.