TWWMABMTBH Chapter 50

A suffocating emoji.

[Muddled value 400]

The girl on the other end was clearly stunned after being confronted. It wasn’t until a long while later that she reacted, and then realized something was wrong.

“Are you a WeChat business?”

“Yes! I not only have salted fish, but also salted duck eggs, and I also sell pet geese. Wanxi white geese, good for guarding the home, can be both sweet and salty, a must-have for tough guys. 28 days in the incubator. Boss, would you consider it? [Well-behaved and cute]”

“…” So is it really okay to promote yourself so blatantly?

The girl was also amused by Rong Ziyan. But she had to admit that after chatting with Rong Ziyan, her emotions had indeed calmed down. And thinking about the method Rong Ziyan suggested, she felt it was indeed a good way to make green tea bitches and scumbags feel disgusted.

She heard that salted fish is quite stinky, perfect for those rotten fish and shrimp at home. Tui! That’s not home at all, she must break up with that stupid scumbag! Let him and his cousin go to hell together.

Thinking this, the girl immediately placed an order with Rong Ziyan.

After asking for the address, she discovered that the two were less than a kilometer apart in a straight line.

What surprised the girl even more was that Rong Ziyan was actually a student at the Agricultural University.

So, is the Agricultural University starting a new business? She vaguely heard neighbors say that the geese raised at the Agricultural University were very powerful, so the raw materials for the duck eggs and salted fish were also produced by the Agricultural University itself?

Unknowingly, the reputation of the Agricultural University was innocently tarnished. But Rong Ziyan was completely unaware of this beautiful misunderstanding.

He was currently busy packing the goods for the girl.

Because the two were so close, the girl planned to pick them up herself.

Under normal circumstances, she wouldn’t do such a thing. But after what had just happened, with the scumbag and green tea still sitting at home, she really didn’t want to continue facing them.

Plus, Rong Ziyan’s address was on the Agricultural University campus, which seemed very safe. So after telling her best friend where she was going on WeChat, the girl headed towards the Agricultural University.

Rong Ziyan was already waiting at the agreed location. On his way from the dormitory, he happened to run into the geese who were on patrol.

“Dad! Hehehe!” The geese happily rubbed against Rong Ziyan, then followed behind him with their short legs in an orderly fashion, like little tails.

“Dad is handsome, and we are handsome too! Today is also the day to give all our little hearts to Dad!”

Seeing the geese’s various displays of love, Rong Ziyan couldn’t help but smile.

Immediately, all the geese were stunned.

[Intimacy level has reached the limit]

The System weakly issued a prompt: Is it possible to conquer them into lovers?

Rong Ziyan expressionlessly said: No, that’s incest!

The System went crazy: Then get some normal peach blossoms! The last one who developed love for you was a sick duck from Lujia Village.

Sure enough, dog straight men are only suitable with small animals, the System was in its usual self-loathing.

Just then, a girl beside him asked softly, “Excuse me, are you Rong Ziyan?”

Rong Ziyan turned his head. A very pretty girl, with a virtuous temperament and clear eyes, it was obvious that she had a good upbringing and a good temper. But her eyes were red, as if she had been crying.

“You’re the one who ordered the salted duck eggs on TanTan, right?” Rong Ziyan immediately recognized the girl’s identity.

“Yes, it’s me!” The girl reached out and took the things Rong Ziyan handed over, still a bit bewildered.

Mainly because Rong Ziyan was too good-looking, so different from what she had imagined. Especially the way he interacted with those snow-white geese, his smiling eyes were so gentle, not like the sleazy or overly exaggerated look of ordinary WeChat businesses, but like a scholar who was doing research in a laboratory in peace.

So, these things really are produced and sold by the Agricultural University itself!

The misunderstanding deepened even further. But the girl didn’t ask, and Rong Ziyan naturally wouldn’t deliberately explain.

However, before leaving, the girl said to Rong Ziyan, “Thank you for helping me with the idea before, I plan to mess with them a bit and then break up with that scumbag.”

Rong Ziyan heard the determination in her words, thought for a moment, and then patted the two geese at his feet, “Do you want to play with the pretty big sister for two days?”

“!!!” The geese stared at the girl for a moment, then rubbed against Rong Ziyan even more happily, “Dad, you really are my most handsome dad.”

Rong Ziyan suppressed a laugh, ignoring their drama, and then said to the girl, “Take two geese back for self-defense?”

“The rent is fifty yuan a day, they won’t pee everywhere, they’ll go where you point, professional bodyguards.”

“…” So he wasn’t afraid that she would take the geese back and stew them? The girl felt weak all over, and finally had a sense that Rong Ziyan was indeed a WeChat business.

But even so, after seeing the video on Rong Ziyan’s phone of the geese bravely fighting off vicious dogs, she still paid two hundred yuan to rent four geese to boost her courage.

After all, she was going to break up, what if that dog scumbag got violent?

On the way back, the four geese happily walked beside the girl, their narrowed eyes curved into crescent shapes, looking like they were smiling.

The girl couldn’t help but laugh, and patted the geese’s heads, “You have to protect me!”

“No problem, we’re the best at fighting!” The geese were very proud.

At the Agricultural University, Rong Ziyan also led the geese back.

On the way, he ran into a classmate, who asked him, “Why are there four fewer geese?”

Rong Ziyan: “I rented them out to a girl as bodyguards.”

Thinking that Rong Ziyan was joking, the classmate didn’t take it to heart. Rong Ziyan didn’t try to explain, and continued to walk while scrolling through TanTan.

The System tried to emphasize with him: I say, Rong! Look at the pretty girls on TanTan, don’t you have any ideas?

Rong Ziyan: Yes! I think I can start a new business!

In these dating apps, there are too many girls who have emotional problems and need protection to avoid being harmed by scumbags after breaking up. It was time to start a round of goose rental business!

So, Rong Ziyan casually added “Emotional Resolution Master” and “Bodyguard Services” to his profile.

The System thumped its chest and stomped its feet: Rong! You’re probably going to die alone in this life!

Rong Ziyan: Don’t talk nonsense! When I settle down, I’ll definitely find a good girl and start a family.

The System expressionlessly said: Wake up! A dog straight man like you can only be bent by a more shameless gay if you want to start a family.

Rong Ziyan: …So, you have personal experience?

The System was finally fed up, and finally blocked him.

The two parted ways unhappily. On the other side, the girl who hired the geese from Rong Ziyan had already arrived home.

It could only be said that the scumbag and green tea girl were getting more and more excessive. Before, they would at least try to hide, but now they don’t even bother to avoid her!

When the girl opened the door, they were intimately leaning together watching TV?!

And the scumbag was personally feeding his cousin fruit. When he saw the girl return, he coldly told her to go cook.

The girl’s expression changed, and she stood at the door without moving.

The geese poked their heads inside to look, and began to get restless.

The cousin giggled and said, “Sister-in-law, don’t misunderstand! My cousin and I grew up together, we’re just used to it, don’t overthink it.”

The girl was choked and couldn’t respond. She simply recorded this sentence to Rong Ziyan and asked him how to reply.

Rong Ziyan also replied quickly, “Yes, you don’t need to overthink it. After all, she’s weak as a thread, and probably doesn’t have much time left.”

Weak as a thread… the girl burst out laughing. Wasn’t that exactly what the cousin meant with her squeaky voice?

She simply repeated Rong Ziyan’s words verbatim, and even added a sentence that she had learned without a teacher, “Don’t worry, I won’t argue with a patient.”

Then, while the green tea cousin’s face was stiff, she happily went into the kitchen.

She heated up the wok and poured in oil, then took out the salted fish from her pocket. Following Rong Ziyan’s instructions, she threw the whole fish into the oil to fry.

Suddenly, an extremely fishy stench emanated from the pot, comparable to a biochemical bomb.

“!!!” The girl herself was shocked. The point was that the cousin and scumbag were nearly gagging.

“What are you doing!” The scumbag stormed in from outside, ready to pat the girl’s shoulder.

The girl subconsciously wanted to dodge, but before she could move, the four geese at her feet flapped their wings and rushed up.

“Fuck! What the hell did you bring back!” The scumbag was suddenly pecked, and the piercing pain from his calf almost made him kneel.

But before he could finish cursing, he was fiercely pecked by another goose.

If it were other geese, they might have been caught when facing an adult man. But Rong Ziyan’s geese were already the bullies of the Agricultural University. They had fought off vicious dogs and subdued criminals, a mere kidney-deficient scumbag was no match for them.

“Ugly! How dare you commit domestic violence on our Miss, tui!”

“Brothers! Don’t say anything, just beat him!”

“Did he just curse? Humph! How dare he curse our handsome dad, we have to beat him to death!”

The group of geese attacked angrily, and the scumbag was pecked until he was bruised and blue, with nowhere to hide. Finally, he managed to seize an opportunity and fled out the door.

And when the cousin saw that her cousin had run away, she could only slip away and follow him.

The huge house was suddenly silent, with only the sizzling salted fish in the oil pan still making noise.

“Ah! Almost burned!” The girl reacted and quickly turned off the stove, then took out the salted fish.

She stared at the fish for a while, and a wave of sadness suddenly washed over her.

After all, they had been together for so many years, even if it was just a dog, there would be feelings. Not to mention a living person.

Closing her eyes, the girl started to cry again.

“Miss, don’t be sad!” The geese couldn’t stand to see this, and quickly went over to rub against her. The girl squatted down and hugged the geese, crying her heart out.

After crying enough, she remembered that she still had other things to do. So she wiped away her tears and began to clean up the house.

She was definitely going to break up with the scumbag. She had paid the down payment for the house, it wasn’t in the scumbag’s name. Now, she just needed to get the scumbag and that cousin’s things out. She would also have to change the lock.

As for the fact that the two weren’t here right now, it didn’t matter. The scumbag’s workplace couldn’t run away!

So, the girl sent all of the scumbag and green tea cousin’s luggage to the mail room at the scumbag’s workplace using a cargo van, and also sent the fried, stinky salted fish, along with the barbell that had just been delivered by Jingdong, as a break-up gift for him.

“This, what does this mean?” The old man in the mail room was a bit puzzled.

The girl explained, “For his cousin, who is so envious of his abs that her hands can’t be removed from his stomach.”

“As long as she exercises every day, she should be able to have them in less than a month! She doesn’t need to envy others.”

After saying this, the girl felt refreshed.

On the way back, she sent a message to Rong Ziyan, but couldn’t help but vent a little, “I guess I’ll be sad for a while, sigh.”

Rong Ziyan replied quickly, “Considering raising geese?”

“???”

“With white fur, loyal to their owners and will not betray, cute and clingy, must-have pets for tough guys. A beautiful lady like you definitely deserves to have one!”

Five minutes later, the girl looked at her Alipay account where another two hundred yuan had disappeared, and began to doubt life.

Wasn’t she just supposed to find a stranger on TanTan to vent her emotions? Why did she spend five hundred yuan and become single again?

But it was also pretty good!

Looking at the geese who were clinging to her, the girl petted them one by one, then heated up some rice porridge for herself, and cracked open a salted duck egg.

Spending money was okay! Dating scumbags was not as good as raising geese!

And so, Rong Ziyan’s first TanTan customer successfully became a repeat customer. However, Rong Ziyan was not satisfied. He was still working hard to develop more customers.

Perhaps because he added the “Emotional Master” label, more girls were now matching with Rong Ziyan.

One girl who was currently chatting with him asked him directly, “Little brother, what do you think, my boyfriend is too much of a straight man, how should I get along with him?”

Rong Ziyan: “What are the specific behaviors?”

Girl: “Well, games are more important than me, and he doesn’t seem to be very interested in my…body?”

Rong Ziyan thought for a moment and replied, “That’s easy to get along with, just treat him like a sworn brother!”

“From today on, he’s your brother!”