Nanke Yifu Chapter 4
byWhere can I find the pond again (4)
“I know that puppy ornament!” Chi Fu kicked off his shoes and went straight to the study, “Isn’t that the one on the bookshelf?”
He found the placement with ease and took out the orange puppy from the acrylic dust cover.
“Put on shoes.”
Chi Fu stepped on Yan Laixi’s slippers on the ground. He was now sure that he was more than just interested in Yan Laixi.
There is a special section of the bookshelf arranged in two rows perpendicular to the wall. The most accessible layer has obvious traces of reading on each book. The other books are the same as that layer, but they are well-preserved new books. There are at least three or four books in the same volume. Without exception, the authors are all Nanke.
“It turns out that amnesia is not all a bad thing.” Chi Fu said.
Yan Laixi asked: “Why?”
“Because I don’t even remember it.” Chi Fu pointed to the books on the bookshelf that have been read many times and said, “I can experience the feeling of reading them for the first time again.”
Yan Laixi said, “Just don’t let me sign for you one by one.”
“So these are all signed by you?” Chi Fu asked.
I always feel that Yan Laixi said this with a bit of resentment. Is it an illusion?
“Yeah.” Yan Laixi said, “And only you have it.”
It’s not an illusion.
Chi Fu reacted immediately and reached for the books on the bookshelf.
“Start looking at the second floor.” Yan Laixi said.
There is a sentence written on the title page of each book, and each sentence is different.The handwriting is light and smooth but not erratic, not messy, free and sharp, but not neat either, and still has a bit of wantonness.
Chi Fu sat directly on the ground with his legs crossed, intending to read them one by one.
“The table is next to you. Don’t sit on the floor.” Yan Laixi helped him get a pile of books and put them on the desk.
Chi Fu stood up with one hand on the ground, moved the pile of books to the bed, and then pulled Yan Laixi to sit on it.
Of course, reliving the love past requires two people to stay together and relive it.However, Yan Laixi didn’t seem to be very interested in this. He propped up one leg, put his arms on his knees, and rested his chin on his wrist. His eyes wandered, but he didn’t look at Chi Fu’s hand.
If you don’t want to read it, just read it. Anyway, it was written in his own hand. He knows the content without reading it.
Chi Fu tilted his body and leaned against Yan Laixi. He had now wholeheartedly accepted the fact that he had a boyfriend whom he had just met but had been dating for a long time, and he accepted it very happily and consciously.
When I turned to a certain book, a piece of paper fell out with a line of words written on it, which was the same as those on the title page.
“Seeing you is like seeing a stream in the sky.”
Chi Fu raised his head, twisted his neck and asked Yan Laixi: “Is this the note you didn’t give me at the beginning?”
“Yes.” Yan Laixi pushed him, “Sit down.”
“Seeing you is like seeing a stream in the sky.” Chi Fu held up the note and read out the words on it. “If you had actually put this note in, I would have been so excited that I could lose sleep.”
Yan Laixi didn’t push him hard at first, but as soon as he said it, he stood up and left. Chi Fu immediately put the note back, confiscated the book, and just put it on the bed, like a little tail hanging behind his butt.
Yan Laixi said: “If you had put it in at that time, you might have been so panicked that you couldn’t sleep.”
“How is that possible!” Chi Fu grabbed Yan Laixi’s shoulders and pushed him to the mirror, “Even if you ignore the fact that I am your loyal reader, even if you ignore all your other advantages. Look at this face in the mirror. With such a perfect face alone, any situation or any form of active expression of kindness will only make the other party doubt whether he is dreaming before he wakes up! Laixi, can you have some awareness of your own charm?”
After Chi Fu finished speaking, he ran away before Yan Laixi could react. His boyfriend was thin-skinned and would shy away from even a few compliments. At such times, he had to run away quickly to prevent Yan Laixi from scolding him for not being upright.It doesn’t matter if he scolds him, it is a kind of enjoyment to get scolded by his lover, but Chi Fu is afraid that Yan Laixi will apologize to him after scolding him, and Yan Laixi will become twisted, which will make him uncomfortable.
He had already gotten up late, but after another trip, it was already dark outside. Chi Fu asked Yan Laixi if he was hungry and what he wanted to eat, and rolled up his sleeves to cook.
Yan Laixi wanted to take the ingredients he just took out from the refrigerator and said, “I’ll do it.”
“Why?” Chi Fu avoided his hand and asked, “Isn’t my cooking delicious?”
Yan Laixi: “No.”
“Then why?” Chi Fu asked.
Yan Laixi said: “I am picky about food.”
“I know.” Chi Fu said.
When he said “My body remembers you” before, he did want Yan Laixi not to be sad, but that was just the reason why he said this, and it did not mean that it was a lie he made up to comfort Yan Laixi.But Chi Fu felt that Yan Laixi didn’t believe him at all.
“I don’t remember, but my body remembers.” Chi Fu bent down. He was no shorter than Yan Laixi. If he wanted to look up and look pitiful, he could only use this posture. “Do you believe me? If not, let’s order takeout?”
Yan Laixi sighed and said, “Don’t let go…”
“Cilantrie and chili pepper.” Chi Fuyi tilted his head and asked, “right?”
The smell of coriander and spiciness were the two answers that immediately came to his mind when he asked himself what he thought Yan Laixi might not eat.And unlike the lettuce, tomatoes and cooked egg yolks in the sandwich, those foods gave him the feeling that Yan Lai Xi would not like it if put in them, but these two flavors gave him the feeling that they should never appear in Yan Lai Xi food, especially the former, which should not even appear within a three-meter range centered on Yan Lai Xi.
“Yeah.” Yan Lai smiled faintly, helped Chi Fu to stand up, and said before going out, “How on earth can you guess so accurately.”
Chi Fu suddenly ignited his fighting spirit, and was bound to use this meal to prove to Yan Laixi that he was really not just guessing, but intuition, an instinct accumulated over many years!
The kitchen was open, and there was a bar that was separated from the sofa in the living room, which was also their dining table. Yan Laixi was sitting on the sofa there, leaning on the backrest, leaning on his arm and looking at him, probably to stop him before he did anything that forced them to order takeout.
For the sake of everything, Yan Laixi sat there doing nothing but watching him, which made Chi Fu feel particularly good.
He hummed a melody casually, washed the ingredients and cut the knife.
“Do you remember what song you are humming now?” Yan Laixi suddenly asked him.
“I don’t remember.” Chi Fu said, “But it must be related to you.”
Yan Laixi nodded: “Indeed.”
Sure enough, all the things that do not exist in the memory but are still remembered by the body are related to Yan Laixi.Chi Fu waited for a few seconds, but the only sound in the house was the sound of him chopping vegetables.
“Laixi.” Chi Fu stopped cutting vegetables and turned to Yan Laixi with a troubled expression, “I have lost my memory. Please make it clear.”
“I asked someone to write a song for one of my novels.” Yan Laixi said, “I also made a music video. Do you want to check it out later?”
“Of course.”
Until the food was served, Yan Laixi didn’t say anything to stop Chi Fu once. Someone’s nose was now turned up to the sky. It was just two or three simple home-cooked dishes. It was not very difficult to avoid the normal level of picky eaters, but Chi Fu now felt that he deserved a compliment from Yan Laixi.
Yan Laixi looked a little surprised and asked, “Have you really lost your memory?”
“I told you that my body remembers it.” Chi Fu filled the rice, set out his chopsticks, poured a drink, and sat across from Yan Laixi, “How about it? No need to order takeout, right?”
While eating, Chi Fu watched the MV that Yan Laixi just mentioned. The melody of the song was exactly the same as the one he hummed.After the meal, the two of them cleaned up the kitchen together. Chi Fu returned to the study and continued to read the title page that he had not read before the meal. Then he tried to pick out a book based on the scattered information obtained from the book cover as the first Nanke work he read after losing his memory.
He didn’t pick out which one to start with, but he discovered a pattern – “Wind”.
Chi Fu put all the books he had taken down back on the bookshelf. After stacking them neatly, he came to the bedroom.
I want to know what special meaning this word has to Yan Laixi.
Yan Laixi was sitting at the computer desk, deleting and modifying a document. Chi Fu glanced at it. It seemed to be the outline of a new book. He wondered if asking him now would disturb his work.
He lay on the back of the chair where Yan Laixi was sitting, waiting for the other party to take the initiative to answer him.
Yan Laixi didn’t let him wait too long. He turned his head and asked, “What’s wrong?”
“Are you busy now? Will I disturb you?” Chi Fu asked.
I always feel like my words are filled with the fragrance of tea.If you really don’t want to disturb me, why don’t you come over later? It’s not something urgent. You poked people in the back and asked them if they were busy now. If you have something to ask, it’s just an excuse. Don’t you just want to seek attention?You have found what you are looking for, are you satisfied?I’m satisfied, and it seems that Yan Laixi hasn’t been scented by him, so it doesn’t matter if the fragrance is stronger next time.
Yan Laixi didn’t answer, just saved the document, shut down the computer, stood up and sat on the bed, looking at Chi Fu: “Tell me, what’s the matter?”
Chi Fu climbed onto the bed, sat down next to Yan Laixi, and asked, “What does ‘wind’ mean to you?”
Yan Laixi raised his eyebrows: “Did you find out so soon?”
Chi Fu showed his attitude now, and after Yan Laixi gradually let go of his barriers to him, the other person’s little expressions and movements gradually became more vivid, smart, and inadvertently exuding charm. Chi Fu was so fascinated anytime and anywhere that he wished he could not eat, drink, or sleep for 24 hours, just stay with this person and look at him.
“My abnormality will give me a very real dream after falling asleep.” Yan Laixi said, “Every time there will be someone by my side. Although we have to say goodbye without exception in the end, the beginning and the process are very beautiful. And the person in the dream, his name is Feng Su.”
Very real dreams and beautiful processes, without exception, we have to say goodbye.
Chi Fu thought of the tears rolling down from the corners of his eyes and asked, “Is that why you cry?”
Yan Laixi was stunned for a moment and said, “I thought you would ask something else.”
Chi Fu didn’t want to ask anything else. A person who experiences separation every day wakes up one day and finds that his lover doesn’t remember him. Everything happened without warning, and he just took a nap.
“I’m sorry.” Chi Fu said, “Were you scared at that time? I said I didn’t remember you.”
“Why do you want to apologize?” Yan Laixi said.
Chi Fu didn’t answer him. He originally just thought that he and Yan Laixi still had a present and a future. The past memories were gone, so it would be good to create new memories. But now Chi Fu changed his mind. He wanted to create new memories, and he also wanted to find the old memories, whether they were fragments or pieced together. He didn’t want Yan Laixi to be the only one to remember the memories of the two of them.
“Can you tell me what I called you before?” Chi Fu asked. The title “Laixi” didn’t give him any special feeling. He should have had other ways of calling Yan Laixi before.
“Do you want to know what happened between us?” Yan Laixi asked.
Chi Fu nodded.
“Tell me more, slowly. I want you to tell me everything you still remember.”
Yan Laixi looked at Chi Fu who was trotting straight to the study. He felt that the braid on the back of his neck was like a puppy’s tail, a short tail like that of a small dog.
He helped Chi Fu put the shoes he had kicked over on the ground, picked up his slippers and followed him.
Chi Fu held the puppy ornament he had just taken out of the dust cover in his hand. Yan Laixi put the slippers at his feet: “Put on shoes.”
It was an extremely ordinary plastic ornament. When he first saw Chi Fu putting it in a dust cover, Yan Laixi had said that it was unnecessary. That cover was more expensive than this one.
Chi Fu stood in front of the bookshelf dedicated to his “collections” and said, “It turns out that amnesia is not all a bad thing.”
“Why?” Yan Laixi asked him.He didn’t have any memories that he wanted to forget, so why would it be a good thing.
Chi Fu pointed at the books and said, “Because I don’t even remember them. I can experience the feeling of reading them for the first time again.”
Yan Laixi didn’t know how he felt when he read it for the first time. The day Yan Laixi saw this shelf of books for the first time, he really wanted to have another meal.
“Just don’t let me sign for you one by one.”
“So these are all signed by you?” Chi Fu asked.
What’s more, on the first day they officially lived together, Chi Fu directly pushed him to the desk, stuffed a pen into his desk, and then moved over stacks of books. He frantically said that he wanted him to sign them all with his own hand. He also asked that the contents of each book be different, and he wanted to decide what to sign.
“Well, and only you do.”
Hearing this, Chi Fu immediately reached for the book on the shelf.
“Start looking at the second floor.” Yan Laixi reminded him.The ones on the first floor were those that Chi Fu himself lined up for autograph signings over and over again. The contents are all the same and there is nothing to see.
Chi Fu flipped through two books, crossed his legs, and seemed to be planning to sit on the floor and read them all.
“The table is right next to you, don’t sit on the floor.”
Has my mental age regressed due to loss of memory? Why do I always act like a child today?
Yan Laixi took down a pile of books from the bookshelf and placed them on the desk on the other side, but the “child” sitting everywhere did not want to sit at the table and read.Yan Laixi followed him and sat on the single bed in the study room, letting Chi Fu lean on him and read each book one by one.
He is actually a little embarrassed now. The disgusting little sentences he wrote when he was in love are basically a vague confession in every sentence. Now he just hopes that his writing is vague enough so that Chi Fu, who doesn’t remember the content of the book, can’t see the other meaning in it.
“Is this the note you didn’t give me at the beginning?” Chi Fu held up a note torn from the small notebook he carried with him.
“Yes.” If the other words were hints, then this sentence was a clear statement. Yan Laixi’s face felt a little hot, and he pushed Chi Fu, who was leaning on him as if he were boneless, “Sit down.”
In fact, this was not the original note. The one hidden in his palm had been torn up and thrown away by him long ago. Later, Chi Fu remembered that there was a time when he asked him if he still remembered what he had written. After learning the truth, he pestered him to write it again.
“Seeing you is like seeing the Tianshang River. If you really put this note in at that time, I would probably be so excited that I would lose sleep.”
After the words on the note were read out, Yan Laixi froze, stood up and left as if running away.What’s the difference between reading something like this out and dying in public!
Chi Fu followed him out. Yan Laixi originally just wanted to say something to relieve the feeling of shame, but was caught in front of the mirror and praised him, which made him even more embarrassed. Fortunately, this time the other person left after finishing speaking, leaving a certain amount of space for Yan Laixi to cool down his overheated head.
When Chi Fu said he wanted to cook, Yan Laixi resisted.In fact, Chi Fu’s cooking was delicious, and he just forgot about himself, and his skills would not regress. The problem was that there were so many things that Yan Laixi didn’t eat, so much that he couldn’t make a complete list himself, and the things he ate were even less than those he didn’t eat.
The other party insisted on making it, and Yan Laixi didn’t insist on stopping him. The ingredients at home shouldn’t make him unable to eat a single meal, as long as there wasn’t…
“Cilantro and pepper. Right?” Chi Fu answered before him.
“Yeah.”
At that moment, Yan Laixi almost believed what he said, “My body still remembers you.” But at that moment, how could his body remember what he was picky about and didn’t eat?
“How did you guess so accurately?”
Yan Laixi leaned on the sofa and looked at Chi Fu, not only to prevent himself from being unable to eat a bite, but also simply to look at him.
A familiar melody flowed out of his mouth. Yan Laixi knew the answer, but still wanted to ask again: “Do you remember what song you are humming now?”
“I don’t remember.” Chi Fu said, “But it must be related to you.”
“Indeed.”
It’s about us.
“Laixi.” Chi Fu looked at him pitifully, “I have lost my memory. Please make it clear.”
“I asked someone to write a song for one of my novels.” Yan Laixi said, “I also made a music video. Do you want to check it out later?”
That novel was the one Chi Fu held in his hand when they first met.
“Of course.”
Somewhat unexpectedly, each dish was so delicious that you could put it in your mouth with your eyes closed. This was not a particularly common situation for a severely picky eater. Chi Fu also poured him a drink.
Yan Laixi is used to drinking something while eating, water or sweet drinks are fine.
It must be just a coincidence. After all, the ingredients that he doesn’t eat at all are basically not available at home, and they just happen to be the way he likes to eat them.
After dinner, Chi Fu dove into the study by himself, and Yan Laixi returned to the bedroom, turned on the computer, and considered how to express the story in the dream this time.After a while, the sound of the door opening and closing came from the other side of the house. Chi Fu came over and lay obediently behind his chair without saying a word.
“What’s wrong?” Yan Laixi asked.
“Are you busy now? Will I disturb you?”
This is because I want to spend some time with him.Yan Laixi did not have amnesia. He knew Chi Fu very well. Besides, the only difference between Chi Fu who had amnesia and Chi Fu who did not have amnesia was his memory. They could be dealt with in the same way.
He saved the document, closed the computer, left the computer desk, and asked Chi Fu, “Tell me, what’s the matter?”
Chi Fu followed and asked, “What does ‘wind’ mean to you?”
Yan Laixi originally thought that it would take at least some time, after he had read two or three of those books, before this question would be raised.
“You found out so soon?”
Yan Laixi told him the reason. He thought Chi Fu might be jealous and might ask him about dreams or Feng Su, or novels about him.
“Is that why you cry?”
Chi Fu apologized to him, but why did he apologize?He didn’t want to lose his memory. Although he said it lightly and focused entirely on “love at first sight”, he woke up and found a stranger lying next to him. This stranger acted like he was familiar with his home after he woke up. Anyone would be wary and scared, right?
“Can you tell me what I called you before?”
“Do you want to know what happened between us?” Yan Laixi asked him.
He originally thought that since the past had been forgotten, it would be fine to let him go. New memories would be born anyway, but Chi Fu nodded.
“Tell me more, slowly. I want you to tell me everything you still remember.”