An Yao’S Observation Diary Chapter 10

Friday, April 11th, Clear

Last night, An Yao still refused.

But thankfully, he gave up the idea of leaving and allowed me to carry him back to the room, where he obediently curled up into a small bundle under the covers.

The crying earlier had clearly exhausted An Yao. He buried his face in my palm, his soft cheeks bunching up. He rubbed against my hand lightly and murmured a reluctant “Good night.”

“Good night,” I smiled, gently rubbing his head. “An Yao, have sweet dreams.”

After tucking him in, I quietly backed out of the room and turned off the light.

With things weighing on my mind, I slept restlessly, but today I managed to wake up early. I sat by the bed, thinking for a long time, before finally digging out the previous items and even putting on the formal suit I kept at the bottom of my wardrobe.

I bought this suit the year I graduated, and I hadn’t worn it in many years. When I tied the knot in front of the mirror, my hands felt clumsy. But surprisingly, after all these years, my physique hadn’t changed much. The young man in the mirror had long shed his initial awkwardness; the glasses perched on my nose added a touch of composure, yet the warmth in my eyes remained, making me appear approachable and kind.

I tried moving around and found that aside from a slight tightness in the arms due to years of exercise, the waist still fit perfectly.

Looks like I haven’t gained weight. I thought optimistically.

Just as I was about to groom myself, I heard faint footsteps behind me. An Yao rubbed his eyes, stumbling out of the room in a daze. Seeing me dressed like this instantly chased away most of his sleepiness.

He blinked, his hair a mess, looking confused as if he wasn’t sure he was awake. “Doctor Lin?”

“I’m here.” I couldn’t help but smile. “An Yao, good morning.”

An Yao’s face instantly flushed.

He scratched his ear, turning his face away uncomfortably. “Doctor Lin, you’re dressed so formally… are you going out?”

“I’m not going out, but I have something important to do,” I said. “I need your help.”

An Yao paused. “Me?”

“Yes,” I said. “You.”

I gently took An Yao’s wrist and led him slowly into the living room. Although the young man’s face was full of confusion, he obediently followed me.

The living room had already been tidied up. The dolls and cushions usually scattered around were neatly lined up, and the clutter on the coffee table was gone, replaced entirely by various certificates and business licenses with different covers.

An Yao sat down properly on the sofa, looking down at the documents on the coffee table, then up at me, dressed meticulously. The questions in his eyes were almost tangible, slowly leaking out.

“Doctor Lin…?” An Yao asked softly. “What is all this…?”

I didn’t answer immediately. Instead, I cleared my throat, adjusted my collar, and stood before him.

“An Yao, perhaps the current me is still a bit unfamiliar to you,” I said. “Let me introduce myself first.”

As I spoke, I took a small remote control from my inner suit pocket and pressed it lightly. With a subtle whirring sound, a projection screen slowly descended along the wall. I had originally bought the projector for watching movies, but I hadn’t expected it to come in handy now.

A few seconds later, a simply designed PowerPoint slide was projected onto the screen, the title clearly visible in the morning light.

“I put this together quickly, so it’s a bit rough,” I smiled at An Yao. “Please bear with me, Little Teacher An.”

An Yao blushed and waved his hand. “I don’t mind.”

To be honest, when the idea of a formal introduction popped into my head last night, I almost slapped myself—it was such a neurotic and inexplicable action, like an overly enthusiastic teenager recommending his favorite web novel during a formal classic literature class. But after tossing and turning, I finally got up and opened my computer.

I wanted An Yao to see the most complete version of me.

This was not only to show my sincerity but also to let An Yao clearly understand who the person standing before him truly was, what kind of past he had, and what kind of future he could provide for him.

If I couldn’t even completely reassure this young man who was always feeling insecure, then all the promises I had made earlier were just empty words.

Thinking this, I took a deep breath, calming the emotions surging in my chest. I cleared my throat and officially began my self-introduction.

“My name is Lin Qingyan, and I am 32 years old. I graduated from…” I named a well-known domestic university. “I currently hold a Doctoral Degree and run a small Clinic near Qingjiang Road.”

An Yao straightened his back, his hands neatly placed on his knees, looking nervous, as if he were the one being interviewed.

I switched a few slides showing real-life scenes, then leaned down, picked up a few certificates from the coffee table, and handed them to An Yao. An Yao instinctively pulled his hands back, afraid to take them. “Doctor Lin, I… I might dirty them…”

“You won’t,” I said. “Take them. It’s fine even if they fall on the floor.”

Only then did An Yao accept them, carefully flipping through the certificates. He struggled to read them, mumbling over some words whose meanings he didn’t understand, requiring my patient explanation. But he looked delighted nonetheless, his eyes slightly curved, as if filled with light.

“This is my driver’s license, these are my College English Test Band 6 and Band 4 certificates, my Medical Practitioner License, my Mandarin proficiency certificate, and at the bottom are my Bachelor’s and Doctoral graduation and degree certificates…” I rattled off a list like a menu. “The ones next to them are various scattered qualification certificates.”

After laying out all these items, I took a shallow breath, trying to lay out my most complete self before him.

“An Yao, actually… I’m not as perfect as you might imagine,” I said. “I have no parents; I grew up in an orphanage. And, I am an Alpha—”

“As you know, Alphas have Ruts. During that time, I might become unlike myself, or even… lose control and hurt someone.”

An Yao’s eyelashes fluttered slightly, but he didn’t look away.

“But don’t worry,” I assured him. “I will prepare in advance, restrain myself, and stay in the room. I absolutely will not hurt you.”

Seeing An Yao still frozen, I quickly placed the property deed and several bank cards I had prepared onto the coffee table.

“These are the deeds for my property and car, and all my savings over the years…”

An Yao was completely bewildered. “Doctor Lin…?”

“Take a look at these first. You can tell me if there’s anything you’re not satisfied with.” I thought for a moment and added, “Perhaps the Band 6 score is a bit low. But it’s okay, I can retake the exam.”

“What are you doing?” An Yao leaned forward slightly. “Why… why are you suddenly telling me all this?”

I didn’t answer immediately. Instead, I slowly knelt down in front of him, gently enveloping his slightly trembling hands in my palms.

“An Yao,” I looked into his eyes. “Everything I said to you last night was serious.”

An Yao suddenly fell silent, lowering his head, his gaze fixed on our clasped hands.

I didn’t rush him, just gently closed my palms, fully covering his cool fingers. Perhaps due to his weak constitution, An Yao’s hands were always cold. I held them, gently kneading his fingertips, and after a while, the warmth returned to his hands, which curled softly in my grasp.

“Doctor Lin…” An Yao lowered his head. He seemed about to say something, but the words caught in his throat. “I… I don’t know.”

He gripped my hand tightly. “I don’t know what is right. I’m just…”

“I’m just a little scared.”

My heart clenched suddenly.

I was still too hasty. I thought.

An Yao was born into an inherently difficult family, with almost no opportunities for trial and error in his life. Life forced him to constantly move forward; he couldn’t make mistakes, but the path ahead was unknown, and he couldn’t retreat. He was just a young man who had recently come of age, and he didn’t know what to do.

Moreover—moreover, an Alpha he had only known for a few days didn’t necessarily mean a better option than an alcoholic, abusive stepfather.

“An Yao,” I softened my voice. “You don’t have to rush to make a decision now.”

“I’m telling you all this today just so you can see the real me,” I said. “We have a long time ahead of us. Let’s take it slow.”

An Yao still didn’t speak.

I was about to say more, but a tightening force suddenly came from the back of my hand. An Yao gently pulled my hand, leaned forward, and rested his forehead against my shoulder. In that moment, he released all his strength, letting the weight of his body press firmly against mine, as if completely entrusting himself to me.

He seemed to take a deep breath. “Okay.”

“I am willing.” An Yao repeated, as if making a firm decision. “Doctor Lin, I am willing to Establish a Marriage Relationship with you.”