When The Snow Falls In Autumn Chapter 7

Chapter 7

When Ye Qiulan woke up, the skylight had penetrated the gap in the old curtains, cutting a pale bright mark on the cement floor of the bedroom.The light gray cardigan beside the pillow was still there, held in her arms unconsciously all night. The fabric was a little wrinkled, but it was still soft against her cheeks.The aura of Ling Xueqing above it had faded a lot after a night, leaving only a faint cold undertone similar to pine needles on a winter morning, mixed with her own warm breath in sleep.

She didn’t get up immediately.Staring at the tiny cracks on the ceiling, every scene from yesterday afternoon to dusk is as clear as a carving knife in my mind: the light spots shaking on the long table in the library, the glass of warm water pushed over by Ling Xueqing, the quickness of fingertips when rescuing the fragments, the heavy silence when talking about family on the porch sofa, the subtle touch of dead leaves in the forest falling on the top of the hair, the heavy pause on the shoulders and the close breath when putting on the cardigan at the fork in the road.

The heartbeat beats the eardrums loudly in the quiet morning, with residual throbbing and a dull feeling that becomes more clear after waking up.She raised her hand and touched her lips lightly with her fingertips.It hasn’t been touched yet, but it feels dry for no reason.

The scattered chirping of early birds came from outside the window. My roommate turned over on the bed opposite and mumbled something vaguely in his sleep.Everyday sounds began to seep into the night that was dominated by an overextended twilight.Reality, with its inherent and indefinable rhythm, is returning.

Ye Qiulan finally sat up, carefully folded the cardigan and placed it next to his pillow.She didn’t immediately stuff it into the closet as usual.His fingers lingered on the folded clothes for a moment, and the fabric conveyed a slightly cool touch.She got out of bed, washed and changed her clothes, her movements half a beat slower than usual, as if her body had not yet completely landed from the dusk filled with silent waves.

She picked up the constant humidity book box and brushed her fingertips against the metal buckle that Ling Xueqing helped fasten yesterday.Cool to the touch.She hesitated for a moment, then carefully put the book box into the canvas bag, then picked up the folded cardigan beside the pillow, paused, and finally stuffed it into the middle layer of the canvas bag.The soft wool-blend fabric is squeezed between books and clutter, creating a subtle bulge.

After doing all this, she stood in the middle of the dormitory, looking around at this room that she had lived in for more than two years and still seemed strange and temporary.The smell of medicine never seems to go away, the edges of the care manual brought from home are curled, and the iron box of pear candy reflects the cold white sky light on the table.Everything is the same as yesterday, the day before yesterday, and countless yesterdays.

But something is different.She herself was different.

She took a deep breath and put her canvas bag on her back.The bag is a little heavier than usual, not just from the weight of an extra piece of clothing.

—

It was still the same gravel path, the color looked pale in the thin morning sunlight.The metasequoia forest was silent, with lingering dew hanging on the leaves, occasionally dripping and leaving a small dark mark on the soil.The rough bark of the old locust tree is fully textured in the morning light. The gap where the old school badge was embedded yesterday is empty, like a secret that has been filled and hollowed out.

Ye Qiulan walked very slowly.His eyes swept over every familiar sight on the roadside, but it was as if he was really seeing them for the first time.She remembered that Ling Xueqing stopped here yesterday and took off the school badge for her; she remembered the brief touch of her fingers when she took the book box; she remembered her silent and stable presence walking outside of her.

The dull feeling in my heart became clearer again.It’s not pain, it’s a heavy, full, slightly prickly feeling of fullness.She reached into the compartment of the canvas bag and her fingertips touched the soft wool of the cardigan.Under the fabric, there still seemed to be a faint trace of the coolness of the morning, and… deeper down, the almost dissipated aura of Ling Xueqing.She curled her fingers and squeezed the small piece of softness.

We’re almost at the library.The familiar red brick building revealed its solemn outline in the morning light.The camphor trees on the west side still have their branches and leaves whirling.Her steps unconsciously became slower, almost procrastinating.I longed to see the window seat, but also felt an inexplicable nervousness that was almost timid.Will Ling Xueqing be there?Will he be sitting there as usual, looking down at the difficult books?What’s the first thing you say when you see her?Will you mention yesterday?Will you ask about that cardigan?

There are no answers to these questions, but they stir up subtle ripples in my heart.

She stepped onto the steps in front of the library and pushed open the heavy oak door.The familiar smell of old books and dust in the room hit your face, mixed with the faint smell of disinfectant water after early morning cleaning.The reading area is very quiet, with only a few students who got up early.

Her eyes almost immediately turned to the fourth long oak table by the window on the west side.

There are people there.

Ling Xueqing sat in her usual spot, with her back facing the door.The morning sun passed through the dense branches and leaves of the camphor tree, casting swaying, clear light spots around her.She lowered her head slightly, with a thick book spread out in front of her, and a familiar thermos cup and pencil case in her hands.The sitting posture is straight, the lines of the shoulders and neck are smooth and straight, and the dark hair has a soft luster in the morning light.

Everything was the same as countless mornings before.It was as if the thrilling dusk yesterday had never happened, as if the silent undercurrents, those transgressive touches, and those heavy and slightly sweet exchanges between them were all just Ye Qiulan’s wishful thinking.

Ye Qiulan stood at the door, looking at the back quietly from a distance and a few empty tables.After the initial acceleration of his heartbeat, it slowly calmed down and was replaced by a more complex emotion.Is it peace of mind?Ling Xueqing is here, as usual.Is it loss?It seems everything is back to square one.Or… something deeper that even she couldn’t name?

She took a deep breath and walked over.The footsteps were very light in the quiet reading area, but Ling Xueqing seemed to notice it.When she was still a few steps away from the table, Ling Xueqing raised her head and turned around.

Eye contact.

The morning light fell on Ling Xueqing’s face, outlining her already clear facial features.Her face seemed a little paler than usual, and there was a faint green shadow under her eyes, as if she had not slept well last night.But the moment her eyes touched Ye Qiulan, they fluctuated almost imperceptibly, like a tiny stone being thrown into a calm lake, the ripples were subtle but real.It was no longer filled with the complexity and intensity that was almost overflowing at dusk yesterday, and was once again covered with a thin layer of ice that she was used to, calm and self-possessed. However, under the ice layer, something seemed to have settled down, becoming deeper and heavier.

“Morning.” Ling Xueqing said, her voice was steady as usual, slightly lower, with a bit of hoarseness when waking up in the morning.

“…Morning.” Ye Qiulan heard his own voice, which was softer than he expected.She walked across the table, put down her canvas bag, pulled out a chair and sat down.The movements are a little stiff.

There was a large oak table, open books, and morning light flowing in the room between them.The distance seems farther than ever yesterday, but it also seems closer than ever – because those things that have not been stated but have quietly changed lie in this seemingly ordinary air.

Ling Xueqing’s eyes stayed on her face for two seconds, then lowered her eyes and returned to the book page.”Did you sleep well?” she asked, her tone calm, like a casual greeting.

However, Ye Qiulan heard a hint of subtle and cautious attention inside.She thought of the night she fell asleep with that cardigan on her pillow, and her cheeks felt slightly warm.”…It’s okay.” She replied in a low voice, her fingers unconsciously tightening the strap of the canvas bag, “What about you?”

“Same as before.” Ling Xueqing said briefly, her fingertips unconsciously rubbing the edge of the page.A small, subtle gesture that betrays emotion.

Silence fell.But this silence is different from yesterday. It is not a tense stagnation, but a kind of silence with a little trial and uncertainty.It was as if both of them were adapting to this “new” normal, the distance that had been recalibrated by yesterday’s dusk.

Ye Qiulan took out the constant humidity book box from the canvas bag and placed it on the table.The metal buckle shimmered in the morning light.She noticed that Ling Xueqing’s eyes seemed to glance at the book box, and then quickly moved away.

“This,” Ye Qiulan said, his voice still very soft, “should be returned to the teacher of the Ancient Books Department.”

“Yes.” Ling Xueqing responded without looking away from the page, “I’ll go over there in the afternoon and help you take me there.”

Another “side trip”.Ye Qiulan’s heart trembled slightly.She raised her eyes and looked across.Ling Xueqing lowered her eyelashes, and the morning light cast a faint shadow on the side of her straight nose. Her lips were pursed, showing no special emotion.

“No need to bother,” Ye Qiulan said, “I’ll just go by myself.”

“No trouble.” Ling Xueqing raised her eyes and looked at her.His eyes were calm, but with a determination that could not be rejected.”I just need to check some information.”

The reasons are sound and impeccable.Just like helping her get the book box yesterday.

Ye Qiulan did not refuse anymore.She nodded, her fingers loosened the tight straps, and gently stroked the smooth surface of the book box.A cold feeling came from my fingertips.”…Thank you.”

Ling Xueqing said nothing and returned her attention to the book page.But Ye Qiulan noticed that her turning of pages was slower than usual, and her eyes seemed to stay on a certain line of words for a little too long.

Ye Qiulan also took out his books and notes, but couldn’t read a word.In the corner of his eye, he could see Ling Xueqing’s calm profile, her well-jointed hand holding the pen, and her shoulders rising and falling slightly with her breathing.In the air, in addition to the smell of old books and old wood, there seemed to be a very faint, cold aroma belonging to Ling Xueqing lingering in the air. It was clearer than when she was outdoors yesterday. Perhaps it was due to the closed space, or perhaps… her own senses had become too sharp.

She thought of the cardigan in the mezzanine of the canvas bag.Take it out and give it back to her now?Seems too deliberate.Not paying it back?After all, the clothes are not mine.Moreover, Ling Xueqing…could he think that she had forgotten?Or, are you waiting for her to return it?

The thought made her restless.She quietly reached into the canvas bag and her fingertips touched the soft wool.The fabric was a little warm when she covered it.She curled her fingers, held it, and let go.I repeated it several times but never had the courage to take it out.

Time passed slowly in silence and the slight sound of pages turning.The sunlight gradually became brighter, moving the light spot on the table an inch away.There were gradually more and more people in the library, and the distant whispers and footsteps seemed blurred through a layer of frosted glass.

Ling Xueqing suddenly put down her pen, picked up the thermos cup, and took a sip of water.Her Adam’s apple rolled slightly.Then, she put down the cup, and her eyes seemed to glance across Ye Qiulan’s empty shoulders inadvertently, and then quickly moved away, landing on the swaying camphor branches outside the window.

“This morning,” she said suddenly, her voice still steady, but as if she was considering her words, “it’s a little cold.”

Ye Qiulan was stunned for a moment and then understood.She was talking about the cardigan.The heat in my cheeks rose again.”…Hmm.” She responded in a low voice, and her fingers secretly tightened the clothes in the canvas bag under the table.She wanted to say, “I have the clothes here,” or “I’ll wash them and return them to you,” but when the words came to her lips, they turned into an almost clumsy sentence: “Are you… cold?”

After asking she regretted it.Ling Xueqing was wearing her usual long-sleeved shirt, with the collar tightly buttoned, and she didn’t look cold at all.

Ling Xueqing turned back and looked at her.The morning light fell on her eyes, reflecting a little glimmer.She was silent for two seconds and then said slowly: “It’s not cold.” After a pause, she added in a lower voice, “You are dressed…appropriately.”

The last three words were so light that they almost melted into the air.But Ye Qiulan heard clearly.Every syllable was like a small hammer, tapping lightly on her heart.

suitable.

It’s not just about size, right?

A wave of heat rushed to the top of his head, and his ears were incredibly hot.Ye Qiulan hurriedly lowered his head and pretended to sort the pages of the book, but his fingers were a little unruly and he folded a page and made a small mark.She didn’t dare to look at Ling Xueqing, her heart was beating so fast and loud that it almost knocked out of her chest.

Ling Xueqing didn’t speak anymore.She picked up the pen again and focused her gaze on the page, but Ye Qiulan noticed that the edges of her auricles also had a very light, almost invisible layer of pink.The knuckles of the fingers holding the pen were slightly white.