HR Chapter 52
by VolareSi Cheng Duyu was one of the only two men in the world who truly loved Xiao Qi, but his love wasn’t based on Xiao Qi being his son, but rather on Xiao Qi being Jian Mo’s son.
Xiao Qi was born with a face that could launch a thousand ships. His slightly pointed chin was delicately curved, his eyebrows possessed Si Cheng Duyu’s peak-like elegance, his nose was like Jian Mo’s refined and creamy jade, and his lips, painted with rouge and containing pearls, resembled Jian Mo even more. Only his eyes were unlike Si Cheng Duyu’s slender and clear ones, nor like Jian Mo’s amorous almond eyes. They were dark, round, naturally gentle, pure, and inherently noble, carrying a hint of authority. Looking into his eyes evoked one feeling, while looking at his entire face evoked another.
Si Cheng Duyu often didn’t dare to look directly at Xiao Qi. He would fix his gaze on Xiao Qi’s nose, the part that most resembled Jian Mo, affectionately pinch it, and say with a smile, “Good, Dad is relieved. As long as you’re well, Dad is relieved.”
Looking at Xiao Qi, Si Cheng Duyu felt a sense of gratification at seeing his son suddenly grown, but this gratification also contained the regret of not having witnessed Xiao Qi’s growth.
During their separation, Si Cheng Duyu felt as though he were trapped in a nightmare, unable to wake up no matter what. One moment he would see Jian Mo’s lifeless sleeping face, and the next he would hear Xiao Qi’s cheerful, bell-like laughter.
Sometimes he felt Jian Mo whispering in his ear, “Duyu, where’s YiYi? Did you lose him?”
There was no reproach in her voice, yet Si Cheng Duyu was flustered and hurried to explain. Before he could even speak, he seemed to hear Xiao Qi calling out to him from somewhere, “Dad, Dad, Dad…”
His voice came down like a rain, scattered in all directions by the wind, ethereally sorrowful.
Si Cheng Duyu couldn’t help but clutch his head and wail, hating himself. As a doctor, he couldn’t save his wife; as a father, he couldn’t protect his child.
Whether as a husband or a father, Si Cheng Duyu was a failure.
Fortunately, Jian Yi had returned. Si Cheng Duyu couldn’t help but curl his lips into a smile at the thought, and his Jian Yi had grown up healthy.
Just as father and son were in a moment of deep affection, a furious shout suddenly came from outside the door: “Let go!”
Si Cheng Duyu’s hand trembled, and he instinctively separated himself a little from Xiao Qi, looking with trepidation at the person entering the room. His lips moved, but he couldn’t say anything.
Si Cheng Zhengli shielded Xiao Qi behind him, staring at Si Cheng Duyu and asking, “Why are you here? Who allowed you to come?”
Si Cheng Duyu lowered his head, like a child who had done something wrong: “I came to see Jian Yi.” He suddenly looked up, pleading urgently: “Just one look, I’ll leave after one look, don’t chase me away, I…” His eyes were blank as he looked at Si Cheng Zhengli, then at Xiao Qi.
“You’re not crazy? Were you faking it before?” Si Cheng Zhengli sent Xiao Qi to Lu Qinyuan’s side, rebuking him, “If you keep protecting him like this, you’ll regret it when he dies right in front of you.”
After speaking, he pushed Si Cheng Duyu out. Outside the door, they encountered the persistent Si Cheng Houzai again. Seeing that Si Cheng Duyu was as normal as anyone else, not crazy or foolish, Si Cheng Houzai was pleasantly surprised. His turbid eyes filled with tears. He wiped the corner of his eye, his voice trembling as he said, “Duyu, you’re not crazy anymore? It’s good, it’s good.”
Si Cheng Duyu was also very excited, grabbing Si Cheng Houzai’s arm and saying repeatedly, “Dad, Jian Yi has grown up, it’s amazing, how did he grow so fast? I haven’t seen him in what feels like a blink of an eye, and he’s grown so big. Dad, tell me, is Jian Yi really Jian Yi? It’s like I’m dreaming. Dad, who do you think Jian Yi looks like? I think he looks more like Amo, especially his nose. Dad, Jian Yi said he doesn’t hate me, he still acknowledges me! He called me Dad, Dad, he called me Dad, I’m so happy…”
Si Cheng Houzai listened blankly, tears streaming down his face instantly. He lowered his head and sobbed softly. Si Cheng Duyu, who was in the middle of his excited speech, was completely baffled at the sight: “Dad, why are you crying? Don’t cry.” He frantically searched his body for a handkerchief, finally raising his hand to clumsily wipe Si Cheng Houzai’s face, a smile plastered on his own face the entire time.
Si Cheng Zhengli watched coldly, a sneer curving his lips.
The suspended experiment began to operate again.
Just as the sky was beginning to brighten, the sound of a key unlocking the door came from the entrance. Lu Qinyuan, a light sleeper who was constantly vigilant, woke up almost immediately, but didn’t move.
The footsteps grew closer and closer, stopping right in front of the bed.
With a “click,” the warm-colored bedside lamp turned on, and a figure cast a shadow, covering Lu Qinyuan completely.
Xiao Qi seemed exhausted and slept very soundly, holding Lu Qinyuan’s waist tightly with both hands, pressed very close. Lu Qinyuan carefully turned over, squinting as he saw Si Cheng Zhengli dismantling an intravenous indwelling needle, the plastic bag making a soft rustling sound.
“Take one of Xiao Qi’s hands out.” Si Cheng Zhengli’s voice was very soft. Lu Qinyuan frowned, and, as instructed, revealed Xiao Qi’s left hand, which wasn’t pinned underneath him.
Si Cheng Zhengli was intimately familiar with the locations of Xiao Qi’s blood vessels. He applied a tourniquet, found the right spot, and inserted the needle directly. Xiao Qi wanted to retract his hand restlessly, but Lu Qinyuan held it down. Si Cheng Zhengli tore off a piece of tape to secure the indwelling needle, then took out a blood collection needle, reached out, and pressed on Xiao Qi’s arm. He inserted it again, and bright red blood flowed back into the collection tube through the clear plastic tube. The blood flowed very slowly, taking a long time to fill one tube.
Without Si Cheng Zhengli having to say anything, Lu Qinyuan knew that Xiao Qi’s blood was different from that of ordinary people. Si Cheng Zhengli changed to the third collection tube, his gaze fixed on it. He only looked away after seeing that the tube was full, removing the blood collection needle and pressing a cotton swab against the needle hole.
Xiao Qi’s blood was thick, and only a little red stained the cotton swab. Si Cheng Zhengli threw away the cotton swab, collected the blood collection tubes, tidied up, turned off the bedside lamp, and left silently as he had come, without a single word of excess.
In the dim, gray night, Lu Qinyuan stared at the indwelling needle inserted into the back of Xiao Qi’s hand, his eyes as dark and ambiguous as the night. Lu Qinyuan finally understood a little about Xiao Qi’s anger and helplessness back then. Even if he was injured, even if he made a mess of himself, that only meant that he had once resisted, but he had failed. That was still better than doing nothing at all.
The night seemed to stretch on endlessly, long and without end. Lu Qinyuan thought about a lot, but when he tried to recall it, he couldn’t remember anything. It was empty, with many thoughts, but all of them were fantasies.
Tormented and waiting in this way, they finally welcomed the first ray of sunlight in the morning. Lu Qinyuan was no longer so anxious and uneasy. He turned his head to look at Xiao Qi, wondering how Xiao Qi would react when he woke up and saw the indwelling needle on the back of his hand.
Unexpectedly, Xiao Qi smiled and questioned Lu Qinyuan when he saw the indwelling needle on his hand: “Look, is this how you protect me?”
Lu Qinyuan said: “If I could, I would rather that needle be in my body.”
Xiao Qi’s smile instantly faded. After a long silence, he turned his palm over and held it out: “I used to cry, make trouble, self-harm, and commit suicide, using every trick in the book, but I’m still alive. They drew a circle for me, letting me make a mess inside it, as long as I didn’t die. This scar is from the most serious time. I almost succeeded that time.”
On his wrist was a pink scar, cutting across the entire wrist. The cut was neat, suggesting that he was determined to die at the time, determined to go to his death.
“But when I was really about to die, I was afraid. I felt like I hadn’t lived enough.” Xiao Qi chuckled softly: “Actually, I’m just a coward. I’m afraid of death.”
There was one more sentence that Xiao Qi didn’t say: he was even more afraid of dying before Mu Linxian, leaving Mu Linxian alone.
Xiao Qi with the indwelling needle was like a dog with a collar. These words were said by Xiao Qi himself. When Si Cheng Zhengli came to give him an IV drip, Xiao Qi barked at Si Cheng Zhengli twice, and Si Cheng Zhengli praised him: “Good dog, be obedient.”
Xiao Qi only smiled. Si Cheng Zhengli listened to his heartbeat, which was much slower than normal, and his expression became solemn. He then felt Xiao Qi’s pulse for a long time before letting go, saying to Lu Qinyuan, who was sitting beside him reading a book: “Mr. Lu, if you have even half a place for Xiao Qi in your heart, please take care of your physiological needs yourself from now on.”
Lu Qinyuan found a rare book in the study that he had been looking for for a long time and was reading it with great interest. He casually replied: “Okay, I understand.”
This perfunctory tone infuriated Si Cheng Zhengli. When he turned around and saw Xiao Qi adjusting the speed of the drip, his long-suppressed anger exploded. He raised his hand and slapped Xiao Qi on the head twice, saying in a harsh tone: “So you are a good dog, just praised you and you’re already causing trouble again. You can just say you want to die before Mu Ge, and I won’t have to put so much effort into fighting with Yama for a person. Don’t you know what your own body is like!”
Lu Qinyuan looked up from his book, very dissatisfied with Si Cheng Zhengli’s attitude: “Can I report you for verbally abusing and threatening a patient, Doctor?”
Si Cheng Zhengli scoffed, indicating: “You’re welcome to do so at any time.” He turned around and left. He wasn’t afraid of Xiao Qi causing trouble again. Xiao Qi wasn’t afraid of anything, except dying before Mu Linxian. Si Cheng Zhengli had a firm grip on this weakness, and it still worked every time.
After leaving Xiao Qi’s place, Si Cheng Zhengli handed the things to his assistant and went directly to Mu Linxian’s place. Mu Linxian had caught a cold yesterday and couldn’t even get out of bed now.
Before he even entered the door, he heard a series of suppressed coughs, followed by the voice saying intermittently: “I… cough cough… don’t have much time left, you don’t need to… cough cough…”
Si Cheng Houzai’s voice came through faintly: “You are my most outstanding disciple, you have even more talent than Duyu.”
“Is that so?” Mu Linxian’s voice sounded like wind and mist: “Teacher is risking being scolded by Zhengli just to say these things to me?”
Another bout of coughing followed.
After a moment of silence, Si Cheng Houzai finally spoke, his voice so low that it seemed about to be scattered by the wind as soon as it left his mouth: “I’m sorry…”
But Mu Linxian heard clearly. He smiled with relief: “You should say those words to Xiao Qi. He is so innocent.”
“As a member of the Si Cheng family, dedicating oneself to science is a matter of course, even a privilege that others can’t even ask for!” Si Cheng Houzai said: “His two older brothers have made contributions to the Si Cheng family, how could Jian Yi fall behind? I just helped him choose the most suitable way for him.”
Mu Linxian slowly closed his eyes, refusing to continue talking to Si Cheng Houzai. For more than ten years, Mu Linxian had tried countless times to make this old man, who had been brainwashed by the family’s science, recognize his mistake, but the results had all turned into futile arguments.
Si Cheng Houzai sighed: “Cheng Hui, our positions are different, no one can understand anyone else. You think you are right, and I think I am right.”
Those with different paths cannot make plans together, yet they had been arguing about that stubbornness for Xiao Qi for more than ten years.
Mu Linxian didn’t want to continue listening to Si Cheng Houzai’s reasoning and said to the door: “Zhengli, come in, we’re done talking.”
Si Cheng Zhengli walked in, glanced at Si Cheng Houzai, took out a thermometer, shook it twice, and handed it to Mu Linxian, his fingers pressed on Mu Linxian’s pulse, not moving for a long time.
Si Cheng Houzai sensed that something was wrong and hurriedly asked: “Your senior brother…” Receiving a sharp glare from Si Cheng Zhengli, he quickly shut his mouth.