TSBIR Chapter 80

Chapter 80: Shen Xingyang’s Relief

Shen Xingyang paused for a long time before calming down and continuing.

“After my brother died, I found out it was all Yin Yan’s scheme. Later, I wanted to kill him for revenge, but I failed and was imprisoned by him. He locked me up, not allowing me to leave the room. I could only stay in that small place, unable to see anyone except him.”

“He was always busy. I was always alone in that room, with nothing. I would sit by the window, watching the sun rise and set every day. Every time I was in that loneliness, I would actually look forward to Yin Yan’s appearance, looking forward to the appearance of the murderer who killed my brother. I hated myself, and I hated Yin Yan. Later, I started trying all sorts of ways to commit suicide. Once, I drowned myself in a bathtub filled with water. That time, I was the closest to death. But I failed, and Yin Yan still found out.”

Shen Xingyang’s voice was low and heavy at the beginning, but when he got to this point, he suddenly stopped, then smiled helplessly and began to raise his voice.

“He started to get scared, just like me. He watched me not speak, not eat, just staring at the ceiling all day. As long as there was no one around, I would think of all kinds of ways to commit suicide, or kill him. He had no choice but to seek help from the most famous psychiatrist, which is you, Song Yichen!”

As Shen Xingyang said this, he looked at Song Yichen. Song Yichen also looked at him in shock, wondering why Shen Xingyang had still reached the point of jumping off the building if he had been there.

Even if he didn’t love Shen Xingyang, he was confident in his psychological treatment, and it shouldn’t have had no effect at all.

“You started helping me to get out of it, using all kinds of methods, but the effect was not obvious. Later, you told me that you were entrusted by my brother to take care of me. You said that my brother wanted me to live.”

“You also said that you would help me escape and make Yin Yan get the punishment he deserved. You started to think of a way, and finally, everything was planned, ready to take me away, but Yin Yan found out. He even disregarded the Song family’s revenge and had people shoot you in front of me. I watched you fall, but I couldn’t do anything.”

“Finally, on the day Yin Yan was preparing to marry someone else, I wore a white dress shirt covered with the process of your death, and jumped from this rooftop in front of Yin Yan. In the moment before my death, the most painful moment, I was actually mostly relieved. Everything was finally over, and I was liberated!”

“After that, I lost consciousness. When I woke up again, I only heard the voices of doctors and nurses rescuing me. In the same hospital, I woke up, and it was in front of Gu Ze. I was reborn. At first, I couldn’t believe it. I thought I was dreaming, that I had been rescued. I frantically wanted to run out, to see if I was really reborn, until your appearance told me that everything was real. Before my death in my previous life, I was most guilty of killing my brother, and you. So, the moment I saw you after being reborn, my heart was filled with satisfaction. I wanted to save, to make up for those guilts, so I suppressed all the excitement and pretended to calmly listen to your orders.”

Shen Xingyang finally finished speaking. He didn’t expect that telling Song Yichen these things would actually give him an immense sense of relief.

Song Yichen’s eyes were deep, hiding something, but Shen Xingyang could feel Song Yichen’s fear, or rather… heartache, or perhaps something else, from Song Yichen’s tight grip on his hand.

“Shen Xingyang, look up!”

Shen Xingyang, who had been looking down while talking about his past life, raised his head in confusion, and just happened to touch Song Yichen’s cold lips.

Song Yichen forcefully wrapped around Shen Xingyang’s tongue, pulling him onto his lap and tightly hugging his waist.

Shen Xingyang’s tongue was numb from the kiss, and his whole body went limp, weakly supporting himself on Song Yichen.

He thought it was comfort, but Song Yichen lowered his head closer to him, his low, hoarse voice entering his ears.

“I lied to you in my past life!”

Shen Xingyang looked at Song Yichen in confusion, as if asking if Song Yichen also knew about the past life. But Song Yichen looked at him, very firmly and confidently.

“In my past life, I didn’t help you because of your brother’s entrustment. It was because, I don’t know when, I fell in love with you, so I didn’t hesitate to give my life to help you escape from that place that made you suffer.”

“Shen Xingyang, no one would be willing to pay the price of their life because of an entrustment, let alone me, with the entire Song family behind me. Do you think an entrustment would make me willing to abandon my family and give up my family, just to let you be free?”

“Shen Xingyang, only a one-track mind like you would believe such words. If I didn’t love you, how could Yin Yan not hesitate to offend the Song family to kill me?”

Shen Xingyang was stunned. His mind was filled with the look in Song Yichen’s eyes before he died in his past life, and that comforting smile.

He seemed to understand all of a sudden. It was because of this?

So, in his past life, he missed Song Yichen once: “Then why did you lie to me in your past life, saying it was my brother’s entrustment? Also, you never expressed that you liked me. And you were so cold, just like when I first met you in this life.”

So at first, Shen Xingyang thought Song Yichen hated him.

“You were too well-behaved, which made me want to bully you, to see you angry and frustrated.”

At first, Song Yichen was more unwilling to admit that he had fallen in love with Shen Xingyang, and was also very anxious. Moreover, Shen Xingyang was still in a relationship with someone else at that time.

So he deliberately acted badly, not wanting others to discover that he was different to Shen Xingyang.

But also, Shen Xingyang always looked submissive in front of him, and he really wanted to see Shen Xingyang be unable to bear it anymore and get angry with him.

“I’m really angry, and you’re not happy!”

Shen Xingyang looked at Song Yichen with a smile. In fact, although Song Yichen always said those unpleasant words, he had been helping him in action. It was just that he hadn’t noticed it.

“Was it hard? When you first came back.”

Song Yichen looked at Shen Xingyang with heartache. That’s why Shen Xingyang schemed against Yin Yan and Shen Jinlin, just because he was afraid that what happened in his past life would happen again.

Shen Xingyang was enduring more than he imagined. He regretted very much that he had been sarcastic to Shen Xingyang when he was at his most difficult.

Shen Xingyang smiled and raised his head to kiss Song Yichen.

“No, whether it’s my past life or this life, I have you by my side, so I never felt hard. I’m very lucky that I met you.”

Song Yichen couldn’t be happier. Shen Xingyang really didn’t hold any grudges against him at all.

It seemed that the current Shen Xingyang completely only remembered the good things about him, and didn’t remember his bad past.