Chapter 76
by VolareLing Sheng’s grandparents passed away early, so Ling’s mother usually celebrated her birthdays with her students. After Ling Sheng’s incident two years ago, everyone knew about his sexual orientation, but Ling’s mother remained calm. When many people sent greetings filled with various implications, Ling’s mother only said that he would handle his own affairs.
This year, hearing that Ling Sheng had returned to the country, many people wanted to come and see him under the pretext of celebrating her birthday. But Ling’s mother knew their intentions, so she only agreed to a few who genuinely cared about her.
Xiang Yang was one of them.
Xiang Yang’s parents didn’t have much education but had high hopes for their son. He received tutoring from Ling’s mother for three years of high school and later was admitted to H University. Now, in the eyes of outsiders, he was a successful winner in life with a successful career and family. So the Xiang family had always been grateful to Ling’s mother. Xiang Yang had come to her birthday almost every year, but since Ling Sheng’s accident and departure abroad two years ago, Ling’s mother didn’t want to deal with those who came to watch the spectacle, so she celebrated her birthdays outside. Counting it, they hadn’t seen each other in three years.
Ling Sheng openly brought Jiang Chen to the private room to wait for the others. Jiang Chen ordered food and greeted the guests, behaving like a host. Everyone immediately understood their relationship. The people who came were all classmates who had a good relationship with Ling Sheng, so after the initial surprise, they didn’t feel anything much, only saying that it wasn’t easy for them.
When Xiang Yang came in, Jiang Chen was leaning towards Ling Sheng’s ear with the menu, saying something. Ling Sheng looked up and saw him, smiling slightly: “Xiang Yang.”
The smile was no different from previous gatherings, but it felt like something had changed.
Jiang Chen stopped talking and looked over.
Xiang Yang, at 1.84 meters tall, was wearing a Polo shirt and khaki casual trousers. He had lost his youthful handsomeness and looked mature and refined. He first looked at Ling Sheng, and then his eyes turned to Jiang Chen, who was also looking at him.
As their eyes met, Jiang Chen stood up and extended his hand to Xiang Yang: “You must be Xiang Yang-ge, welcome, welcome, come and sit here.”
Among all the students, Xiang Yang was one of the closest to the Ling family. The people present, seeing him, also greeted him, but no one knew about their secret relationship during university. They pulled him to chat with Ling Sheng.
“The last time Ling Sheng returned to Jiang City three years ago, Xiang Yang was on a business trip and couldn’t make it to the teacher’s birthday banquet. Counting it, Xiang Yang and Ling Sheng haven’t seen each other in three years, right?”
“They always had the best relationship in high school. Have you been in contact these past three years?”
“Xiang Yang, sit next to Ling Sheng, there’s a space here.”
Several people pushed and shoved Xiang Yang into the seat to Ling Sheng’s left, while Jiang Chen was sitting to his right. Ling Sheng moved his chair to the right, giving Xiang Yang more space, and smiled: “It’s been three years. I sent Xiang Yang a red envelope when his child was born. I was planning to take some time to visit, but the child is three years old and I still haven’t seen him.”
They were all familiar faces. Ling Sheng spoke appropriately and not too intimately. After all, he was gay, and although Xiang Yang had known this for a long time, it was the first time everyone had seen him since he came out.
They had a very good relationship in high school, and Xiang Yang had tutoring at Ling Sheng’s house. The two almost always went to Ling Sheng’s house together after school for three years. After Ling Sheng’s sexual orientation was exposed, everyone inevitably had some fantasies, but since Ling Sheng had brought his boyfriend today, they didn’t seem to have any extra expressions, so they followed Ling Sheng’s words and talked about Xiang Yang’s child.
The meal was very enjoyable. Jiang Chen, acting as a half-host, added food and greeted people. Everyone, seeing this, gradually changed from being a little curious and eager to watch the spectacle to normal.
Until the end, after eating the cake, everyone chatted with Ling’s mother for a while and slowly dispersed. After everyone had left, Jiang Chen came back after paying the bill. Ling Sheng was walking out with Ling’s mother. Ling’s mother said she needed to go to the restroom, so Ling Sheng and Jiang Chen walked outside to wait for her in the lobby.
At this moment, Jiang Chen’s phone rang. He saw it was Jiang Jian, so he showed it to Ling Sheng before getting up and walking outside to answer the call.
Ling Sheng was about to turn on his phone to look at it when a figure stood in front of Ling Sheng.
“Xiao Sheng.”
Ling Sheng looked up and saw Xiang Yang standing in front of the sofa.
Xiang Yang sat next to him, with a slightly complicated expression. He carefully looked at his face for a while before softly asking: “Have you been well lately?”
Many people had asked this question at the banquet, and Ling Sheng gave him the same answer: “Very well.”
This was a sincere answer. He didn’t think there was any time he felt better than now.
Xiang Yang suddenly didn’t know what to say next. After the end of their time in university, Ling Sheng deleted all his contact information. The two had been disconnected for a long time, until once, when Ling Sheng was about 25 years old, they reconnected at Ling’s mother’s birthday banquet, in order to help Ling’s mother get something back from Xiang Yang. Besides that, Ling Sheng had never proactively contacted him.
“You two seem to have a very good relationship. To be able to get back together after being apart for more than two years, that’s considered a broken mirror rejoined,” Xiang Yang said, trying to find something to say.
He didn’t know why he was talking to Ling Sheng here after everyone had left.
In the eyes of outsiders, his life was much happier than Ling Sheng’s. Three years ago, when Ling Sheng came back, he happened to be starting a business. His wife’s family was very powerful, and with his wife’s help, he didn’t encounter any major setbacks in the process of starting his business. Now the company was slowly stabilizing, his child had just turned three years old, he had a wife, a child, and a career, a true winner in life.
And Ling Sheng’s career was ruined by a relationship three years ago, and he was forced to go abroad. Now he had to start all over again upon returning to the country. Although his boyfriend’s family background was considerable, they couldn’t get married after all, and there was no guarantee what their relationship would be like in the future.
He unconsciously compared himself to Ling Sheng, without any deliberate malice, but deep down he seemed to want to prove something.
Before Ling Sheng could speak, his phone vibrated in his pocket. Xiang Yang ignored it. It had already rung four times from after dinner until now for only twenty minutes, this was the fifth. He wanted to talk to Ling Sheng alone, and he had been considering his words, so he hadn’t answered. He didn’t want to answer now even more.
Ling Sheng didn’t notice his abnormality. His gaze was always partly on Jiang Chen, who was answering the phone at the door. Hearing his words, he just smiled faintly and said, “I guess.”
Clearly, Ling Sheng didn’t plan to say much to him.
Xiang Yang’s attention was always on Ling Sheng. He didn’t know what he was expecting or looking for. The current Ling Sheng was more mature and charming than when they separated ten years ago. It’s just that now, even the kind of intentional or unintentional avoidance he had for him five or six years ago was gone, as if he was just a friend who wasn’t too familiar, chatting about a few irrelevant things.
“Xiao Sheng,” Xiang Yang called out a title he hadn’t called in many years.
Ling Sheng’s expression froze for a moment, then he turned all his attention to him.
Xiang Yang felt it. He turned his body slightly, his chest facing Ling Sheng, and said: “Actually, I always wanted to say sorry to you…”
“You’ve said it, and I’ve accepted it,” Ling Sheng interrupted him directly: “Xiang Yang, I’m a man of my word. Besides Coco, no fourth person knows about what happened. For more than ten years, I’ve been keeping my promise. Now, I want to ask you to keep the words you once said.”
All of Xiang Yang’s remaining words were blocked in his throat.
He didn’t really understand what he was doing. He thought of when Ling Sheng kept his hair long and secretly wore skirts for him to see in his house outside of school.
His heart and eyes were full of him.
Actually, he lied at that time. He hadn’t fallen in love with another girl. He was just afraid, afraid of taking a different path, afraid of facing his parents’ disappointed and accusatory gazes, afraid of the price of rebellion, so he chose to run away.
Ling Sheng was braver than him, and knowing that he had been single all these years, he felt a subtle and unspeakable satisfaction, until Ling Sheng’s relationship became known to everyone. Amidst the discussions of the people around him, he had tried to contact Ling Sheng, but he hadn’t been able to get in touch.
Now Ling Sheng finally had someone by his side. He couldn’t explain it, but when these two were together, almost everyone felt that they would be together forever.
Ling Sheng’s steady, calm, but loving gaze when he looked at Jiang Chen was even more moving than the fiery, moth-to-a-flame passion of his youth.
Over the years, he had never received such a gaze again. He had taken a stable path, successful and happy in the eyes of everyone, but he had never received the kind of unconditional love that Ling Sheng had given him.
At this moment, Jiang Chen came in after answering the phone, his face still showing shock and a little confusion.
Ling Sheng stood up, walked to his side, and smiled: “What’s wrong? What did your brother tell you, making you look like that?”
Jiang Chen reached out and naturally held the hand that was hanging by his side, and said: “My parents want to meet Auntie.”
At this moment, he saw Xiang Yang sitting there. Jiang Chen was wondering whether to let go first, but Ling Sheng’s fingers had already intertwined with his: “Isn’t this a good thing?”
Jiang Chen’s heart warmed by his actions, and he squeezed his hand even tighter: “It’s a good thing, it just feels a little unreal.”
Back then, because the incident was sudden and involved a wide range of people, father and son had argued and fought. The cold war of more than two years was a fact, but it was enough for them to calm down. These two years, Jiang Jian had truthfully told Jiang’s father about Ling Sheng’s news. He had always known.
At first, Jiang’s father was still very disdainful, but slowly he became silent. The time Jiang Chen was sick, Jiang Jian went to tell Jiang’s father that he wanted to take Jiang Chen out for a walk alone, and saw that the information about Ling Sheng that he had put on his desk had not been put away. Jiang’s father didn’t say anything and let him take Jiang Chen out.
That time, Jiang Jian wanted to tell Jiang Chen a little bit about Ling Sheng’s news, but Jiang Chen didn’t ask anything. After returning, the father and son sat in the courtyard, and Jiang’s father asked Jiang Jian where he had gone today, and Jiang Jian told Jiang’s father the truth.
In fact, from that day on, Jiang’s father no longer deliberately concealed the news about Ling Sheng, but Jiang Chen had been stubbornly holding his breath, not asking a word. Jiang Chen couldn’t stop regretting when he heard this.
But he also felt that it wasn’t necessary, it wasn’t too late now, and it was good enough.
The tide receded, and the foam that obscured the view naturally dissipated. The coastline was clearly visible, and the sun slowly rose from the deep sea, everything became warm and bright.
“Ling Sheng…” Jiang Chen hesitated a little. He unconsciously frowned slightly, tightened his grip on his fingers, and his voice sank, sounding a little difficult to say: “I apologize to you on behalf of my dad. Actually, it was all caused by me. He didn’t understand you at the time, and he didn’t understand what happened between us, so he looked at you with tinted glasses, and…”
Ling Sheng slowly stroked his face with his fingers and said seriously: “It’s okay, my attitude wasn’t much better either.”
What he said to Jiang Jian was the truth, as long as they could give Jiang Chen to him, he felt that any other price was worth it. Moreover, when it came down to it, Jiang’s father didn’t really do anything to hurt him, he just wanted to protect Jiang Chen. Standing on this point, Ling Sheng understood and didn’t care about anything else.
The two were speaking in low voices, and Xiang Yang over there didn’t hear everything clearly, but looking at the way Ling Sheng looked at Jiang Chen with a smile, the intimacy between the two didn’t need to be expressed in words.
The phone in his pocket vibrated again. Xiang Yang took out the life-threatening phone and finally answered the call. As he dealt with the voice inside, he walked out. When he passed by the two, Ling Sheng politely nodded to him.
After Xiang Yang finished the call, he took a deep breath and was about to say goodbye to Ling Sheng when he turned around and found that the two were no longer in their original positions. He was wondering, when his eyes turned and he saw two figures standing behind the lush money tree near the door.
The sunshine in July was the most intense of the year. After the glaring light was blocked by the sunshade outside, only a bright light remained, shining through. They were standing very close to each other. Jiang Chen was facing the glass, and Ling Sheng was facing the light, looking gentle and warm.
Jiang Chen’s gaze was always on Ling Sheng, full of tenderness and love, not caring at all whether anyone would see. Ling Sheng said something with a smile, and Jiang Chen lowered his head and kissed him on the lips.
Until Xiang Yang walked out without saying anything, Jiang Chen complained a little: “Why did you have to put on a show for him?”
Ling Sheng asked back: “Were you acting?”
Jiang Chen reached out and gently pinched his waist, making Ling Sheng shrink from the ticklishness.
“Yes, I was acting. This level can’t even be considered a kiss. You’ll know what a real kiss is when we get back tonight.”
“Okay, I’ll wait.” Ling Sheng was wearing contact lenses today and didn’t use hair gel, so his forehead hair was hanging down, looking very gentle. He smiled, his eyes sparkling in the sunlight like sprinkled with gold foil, or like the surface of the water smashed by a stone, ripples spreading out in circles, disrupting other people’s hearts.
Like that first glance, and like those moments seen countless times in dreams.
Jiang Chen, like the first time they met, fell into his eyes, held his breath, and disrupted his heartbeat. From then on, he willingly got drunk and never woke up, forever trapped.